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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that I shouldn't be made to feel guilty for driving on the school run?

204 replies

DSM · 17/11/2011 15:36

Some people have to drive their children to school, I am one of them.

AIBU to feel put out at the constant letters home and remarks from other parents/teachers about driving to school? To the point where last week I was given a very hard time for not signing the petition to stop parents driving to school?

As much as I agree that walking to school is a great benefit for children, the campaigners really should consider that its not a viable option for everyone.

OP posts:
solomanswife · 17/11/2011 17:13

If you have to drive your child to school, that's fine, but why do parents feel they have to drop them right in front of the school gate? Surely the little darlings can walk the last 200 yards so the entrance doesn't get jammed up? I used to park a couple of streets away which made life SO much easier all round.

WhoIsThatMaskedWoman · 17/11/2011 17:16

People didn't read your post "properly" because it was really badly worded popbiscuit. I assumed that you didn't mean what you appeared to say because I thought nobody could really mean that, but I can't blame people who assumed that you did mean it.

To the OP, do you think that it would be good to have fewer cars on the road at school run time? And do you believe that every single parent doing the school run by car is doing so because they have no reasonable alternative? If the answers are Yes, and No respectively then the school is probably right to apply additional pressure for as many families as possible to walk, and you just have to suck up the fact that you will get read a lecture that you don't feel applies to you.

popbiscuit · 17/11/2011 17:18

But Karma, don't you think that we should be a little more concerned with how parents take their kids to school? Don't you think that we should all be instilling in our small people to use cars only when absolutely necessary?

There are plenty of days when I'd rather drive to school in my lovely, cozy car but I think it's so important that we make our communities more walkable and our kids more walking/biking-friendly. We have a pleasant 20 minute walk to school; I have three healthy kids and a dog and absolutely no excuse to put my car on the road unnecessarily...

JennaTailor · 17/11/2011 17:19

School is a 20 minute drive for us (In London) ... I set out at 7.45 to avoid the traffic, arriving at the school between 8.05- 8.10...spend some time chatting to my son who goes into the school at 8.30 ...then i drive a further 15 minutes to work to start for 8.45am. No way could i walk

YANBU

HarryHillatemygoldfish · 17/11/2011 17:20

What gets me are those that drive past vast empty stretches of safe parking to squeeze past parked cars, kids, bikes and buggies to park directly outside the gates, seemingly at any cost.

fedupofnamechanging · 17/11/2011 17:21

popbiscuit, I think it is entirely a matter of personal choice. You seem to enjoy the experience and that's great. Other people either don't want to or can't and that is entirely up to them. Nobody has the right to tell anyone else that their way of life is 'right' and anyone who deviates is 'wrong'. And starting petitions to make people conform, is just nasty, bullying behaviour.

spiderpig8 · 17/11/2011 17:24

...and completely unenforeable so a complete waste of good paper and ink as my father would say!

spiderpig8 · 17/11/2011 17:27

popbiscuit-well good for you, for sticking to your own principles ,but you seem to think others aren't allowed to have different principles.

Pagwatch · 17/11/2011 17:32

I think that campaigns encouraging parents to walk their children to school are aimed at those who can but don't. If you can't you can't.

But there are lazy fuckers who drive short distances under no time constraints. I know a few. Encouraging them is a good idea given how dangerous the roads around school are with the idiotic selfish driving and the pavement mounting nutters parking wherever they like

If you need to drive, you need to drive.

popbiscuit · 17/11/2011 17:35

But it is wrong to drive to school if you don't have to. It contributes to the following:
-unhealthy children
-traffic congestion
-road rage
-dangerous pedestrian conditions around schools
-pollution

...and Spider, what principle would that be exactly?

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/11/2011 17:39

but popbiscuit - the OP DOES need to drive. Confused

FredFredGeorge · 17/11/2011 17:41

Certainly people should not be forced to take their children to school in a particular way, however bothering people who choose anti-social ones, ensuring parking controls that are appropriate for safety and residents access are rigourously enforced should and the schools should provide an easy way for those who absolutely have to as per the disabled child comment above who couldn't walk from 10min away.

But for those who are doing it for any other reason, shame, hassle, bother but don't ban. It is a personal choice that harms society a lot more than it benefits the individual.

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/11/2011 17:42

I don't think anybody has said that they disagree with the basic idea that if you CAN walk your children to school then you should (circumstances permitting, obviously).

People are objecting to being preached to though. Just because one person feels very strongly about something, doesn't give them the right to bang on and on about it.

popbiscuit · 17/11/2011 17:43

I know she does, Jareth, and I've gone off on a bit of a tangent here. As Pag said, if you can't you can't.

Unfortunately for OP the campaigns have to be targeted at everyone and so, yes, some people who have no choice will have to be made to feel guilty.

spiderpig8 · 17/11/2011 17:43

I have paid for my car, insured, taxed and tested it and I'll damned well drive it when and where i want.
Actually we livea very rural 2 miles away from school so no choice for us.But in any case i would drive if i wanted to, I would certainly not be dictated to on this matter by a school!!!

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/11/2011 17:44

Your tone is getting a bit preachy, that's all :)

popbiscuit · 17/11/2011 17:47

It is getting preachy, you're right. I don't think I've ever gotten so heated on MN before Grin. I might even swear next...

EssentialFattyAcid · 17/11/2011 17:48

YANBU
Being a working parent and walking to school isn't always compatible

thestringcheesemassacre · 17/11/2011 17:51

Have no issue at all with the people who drive. It's the insane and extremely dangerous parking that is worrying. People that park on corners, zig zags, pavements etc. I've started taking a picture with my phone and every week send the head teacher (we live near very large private school) a list of number plates and car makes. It's tedious and I kind of hate myself for doing it, but we have ample parking within a 5 min walk to this school.

JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/11/2011 17:52
Grin
JarethTheGoblinKing · 17/11/2011 17:57

There are 2 people in my street who drive their kids to school which isn't more than a 10 min walk, even at slow toddler speed - they drive both morning and afternoon, and it's bloody ridiculous (I know for a fact they don't work or have time critical things meaning they have to be at home for any reason).

That is fecking lazy IMO. BUT - I'd never dream of telling them that.. Wink

Avantia · 17/11/2011 17:58

stringcheese - I have the same problem with a small pre prep school near me _ the parents drive because they live all over the place then they MUST park as close to the school as possible because little ' Farquhar' cannot possible walk 100 yards up a road. Had big bloody huge Chelsea tractor parked on a junction corner the other day whilst mother stood gassing to another !

Marched over to the school got teacher out showed her the car and asked her to remind parents how to park !

thestringcheesemassacre · 17/11/2011 18:01

Avantia - become a nerd like me and start compiling the list. The head of the school near me has been very obliging and extended the orange cones to stop people parking in the ambulance bay near the care home. You need to see this parking to believe it. I'm like a parking bounty hunter!

LauraIngallsWilder · 17/11/2011 18:23

DSM - gosh no I didnt for a second think or suggest that you should get your 6yo to walk along a busy road (possibly that has no pavement?)
I just meant that the average 6 yo can walk a mile in a lot less than 30 minutes - could be any day of the week to any destination

You misunderstood me, maybe my words were not clear (the perils of MN!)

gothicangel - obviously if your dh has difficulties with walking thats different.

LordOfTheFlies · 17/11/2011 18:42

I work 3 days so my DD goes to Breakfast and After School Club- so we drive these days.(Before 8am and after 5pm so quieter)
On my non-working days we walk (about 25 minutes each way) unless it's tipping down.
I don't give a monkeys if people drive, their choice.

What really winds me up is the parents who go gunning down the very narrow, parked both sides roads without any consideration for other children crossing the road.
And the ones who park on corners, double yellow lines, the zigzags next to the gates.In fact anywhere they can to get near to the school gates (A couple have blue badges, but most don't)

Until I get a job as a Traffic Warden (Traffic Enforcement Officer) I will have to content myself with watching the fights between the drivers or laughing to myself (in an unkind way) when a delivery lorry or bin lorry blocks the road.