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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

.. to be really hacked off with my Mum over vaccinations

311 replies

MrsTwinks · 10/11/2011 16:50

Me and DH are TTC. A passing comment from a relative about my mum and doctors got me thinking about my jabs so thought I'd better get my rubella checked.

Just back from the doctor and it turns out all vaccinations on me stopped when I was about 2. Everything. Now IIRC 1988 was pre the MMR scare, but even so I could understand that, except its all of them. They have recommended I have a polio and tetanus now, but I'm also missing BCG etc.

AIBU to be really fucked off at my mum for a)kinda for just doing it to start with but honestly really b) never bloody telling me!!

I work with kids, shes been on at me to TTC for literally years, and not once has she mentioned me not having had my jabs. The tetanus one really fucks me off too because as a teen I cut my leg open really badly on rusty metal, it got infected so bad even the holes from the stitches got all infected and she didn't let/make sure I had a tetanus booster. I suspect also she never told my Dad because he went ape when I nearly didn't have my meningitis c when I was 17. He was a SAHP with me at first as he was a student so I wonder if maybe it was only him who took me in the first place.

I'm still really mad 'cos I ust discovered it ontop of alot of other stuff she did but now its like she coulda been playing russian roulette with not only my health as a child but my kid's if I hadnt thought to check it iykwim.

and breathe

OP posts:
saintlyjimjams · 14/11/2011 22:45

There are cases of herpes encephalitis being linked to autism but he had no sign of brain involvement (thank god!) I don't know. There were other things at the time which may gave had an effecf and I used to worry a lot about what had happened as I was so worried about ds2 and ds3 going down the same path. Now I don't really worry so much, just keep a vague eye on the research more out of interest really. We had some very useful appointments last year with the neurologist etc and I'm pretty happy that at the moment we're not going to get answers - which is fine. He's been looked at in detail now and the best consultants in the area have been very frank about what they know - and what they hope to know in the future.

The words are produced via sequences of symbols - which he has to learn. He can't talk. He has one understandable word - mummy - although he uses vocalisations and his own versions of signs which I can often interpret. He can't talk because he lost the vast majority of speech sounds and partly because he has a severe language disorder. For instance I said to him earlier 'bring me the packets of sweets' and he really didn't understand and just brought me a sweet. I think the talker will help with that as he'll at last have a means of using language. He is a an amazing whizz on google maps - he can go somewhere, middle of nowhere once in the car and then navigate to it on the map You can say 'find me a green bus' and he'll whizz the mouse over the map and put the little man down right next to the bus. He can find places he last visited when he was 2 ('take me to so and so's house' and he does). He taught himself to read maps - he doesn't really have the language skills to be taught something like that. His brothers watch him and say 'woah I couldn't do that' (nor could I - he's corrected me before when I was showing him a house we last visited when he was 2).

He's always been affectionate and now he has an activity he loves (surfing - we go nearly every week) oh and dog walking - he's pretty happy most of the time. It's full on with severe autism (our front door is triple locked) and of course harder work and he doesn't sleep as much as he should at his age (!) but he's made me see the world entirely differently and I strongly suspect that's a good thing!

WhoseGotMyEyebrows · 15/11/2011 09:48

saintlyjimjams Wow he sounds amazing! I completely get what you saying about him making you see the world differently!

There were other things at the time which may have had an effect . . .

What were they if you don't mind me asking?

WhoseGotMyEyebrows · 15/11/2011 09:48

(Also the surfing sounds cool!)

saintlyjimjams · 15/11/2011 10:14

Oh well he had loads of antibiotics. I mean a stupid number and some were very strong (queried by the pharmacist as to whether he should be having them). And the neurologists I've spoken to (2nhs, one American - one has examined him) felt a mitochondrial dysfunction (rather than disorder) is possible given his history. The neurologist we saw felt that there was enough suspicion to do muscle biopsy but it's a very invasive procedure so would be very distressing for ds1 and at the moment there's no agreed treatment protocol so we decided to wait and maybe revisit in the future. So we don't really know what happened. I suspect we'll have more of an idea in the future. Genetics drew a blank - as well as standard frag x tests he's had a microarray which is probably the best current test. The geneticist felt that it won't ge that long before better tests are developed.

The surfing is amazing - I am very very grateful to the surfers who take him out. Ds1 loves it and it has quite literally changed our lives. :)

ArthurPewty · 15/11/2011 12:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GotArt · 16/11/2011 18:46

Leoni... "immune systems supposed to do but turn on themselves out of boredom / lack of use?" lol Indeed!

I saw someone say something about small pox being eradicated... NO, IT HAS NOT BEEN. Don't kid yourself. There are outbreaks around the world. 2007 saw a major one in Afghanistan and all the (well, Canadian ones anyhow) soldiers had to be vaccinated.

Bunbaker · 16/11/2011 23:44

It was me. I don't recall reading about the outbreak in Afghanistan. Do you think it might have been a result of chemical warfare rather than simply catching the virus?

I have been googling before responding to this post and can't find anything. is it being covered up?

bruffin · 17/11/2011 09:01

I can't find anything either Bunbaker
What does come up is that in 2006 they found evidence in Afghanistan that a number of countries were storing smallpox to use in bio terrorism . But it looks like it was normal for soldiers going to middle east to be vaccinated against smallpox before that anyway because of the threat of bioterrorism.

GotArt · 19/11/2011 14:16

I'm only going what my friend, who has been doing stints there as a soldier since 2006... but regardless, small pox has not been eradicated and we are susceptible.

FabbyChic · 19/11/2011 14:17

My son has never been vaccinated. Ever. He is 18, his dad was a SAHD and never took him. He wasnt registered with the doctors until he was 3.

GotArt · 19/11/2011 14:31

The only reason my doctor knows I have a DD2 is because DH went in for a vasectomy consultation. Neither DD1 or 2 are vaccinated either.

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