To be upset when parents dont read with their children.

[AVoidkaTheKillerZombies]

I volunteer at DC's school doing an intensive reading programme for children who are not reading confidently or are having problems reading.

So many of the children have no one to read to at home, in fact the programme asks for the parents to read with the child at home. One parent actually refused the programme because she didnt want to commit to the input (5 minutes a night).

Some of the children have nothing written in the reading diaries and its so sad.

interesting comment from Jux on dyslexic families.
That also fits families with hearing and sight impairments.

My solution to this is that they can play audio books (books on cd) to the child.
Tehre are loads of first reader books now that have the option of a CD - lots of the Usborne young reading scheme does, as does the I Am Reading series.
the first Horrid Henries are available with CD, as are Astrosaurs, Rainbow Magic etc, and you can get loads of picture books with CD too.

If the parent doesn't have time to read with the child, or physically cannot read with the child, then audio books are the way to go. At least then, the child will get some reading at home - even if it's not the allocated school book.

I read with all mine
I cannot be arsed with reading scheme books as they have discouraged both my eldest from reading.

It was hard work turning around my ds2s attitude to reading but I have done it.

Problem is good teachers understand this when I tell them, I have had crap ones though who have said tough, read it. We haven't.

Should add they both now have reading ages above their actual ages. Now just have to do it for dd.

As other posters have said that are a variety of reasons why parents may not read to their children. I would like to turn this around and have a look from a parent who does read to her child and feels also feels sad that children reach year 3 or 6 or whatever with limited reading skills:

• reading seems to have been put at the bottom of the pile at school. We'll teach them phonics but will probably, at best, only hear them read once a week. When my DD was in reception and I questionned the teacher she clearly hadn't even heard my DD read (11 in the class by the way). There is NO excuse for this - other items should be shifted off the curriculum to make way for reading - it is an essential life skill whether it is enjoyed or not. Why are teachers not shouting about the ridiculously over full curriculum? If you have 30 kids listen to 6 a day for 5 minutes, 15 minutes in the morning 15 minutes after lunch for example.

• Work hard with parents, social services whoever to ascertain which children are unlikely to have books at home. Do trips to the library whatever it takes. Give these children extra books. Try and work closely with the parents (I appreciate this isn't always very easy). Identify early on which children need more help and give it to them.

• Don't just send 2 books home a week. Mostly they are uninteresting, ensure they are changed regularly.

I am not going to ramble on any more however my point is that we cannot keep saying 'it's all the parents fault'. Blaming the parents the school will not work someone needs to put things in place to change this. From what I can see the first thing that needs to happen is that the curriculum needs to be altered to allow more of the 3Rs. At the end of the day some parents won't/can't read with the children, these are the ones we need to give more support to.

Oh yes I got told off my my children's previous school for not going in on the stated thursday morning before school to change their books. My children were bussed in which the school knew well enough.

As this thread would suggest, many parents who do read with their children don't fill in the reading diary.

Can you imagine the contents of reading diaries if parents genuinely filled in what they had been reading with their children at home? It would become a nightmare of oneupmanship.

Many parents read to or with their kids all the time, but don't bother with the school reading scheme. I never felt the need to have my reading time with my kids dictated by a teacher or to report back to them, but then teachers generally don't seem to mind and are happy for kids to read whatever. There is no way I would be filling in a book to report back to another parent simply because the parent volunteered at the school, and I feel that reading for children who are really struggling should be properly set out using appropriate techniques, and not done through parent helpers.

Milly I'm sure the teachers at the school where I volunteer wouldn't give a damn what the pupils were reading or being read.
They'd be only too happy for parents like the ones on this thread.

But the reality is that many of the parents do not read anything to their DC. And the DC get no practise with their onw reading at home.
In a class of over 30, with a TA making sporadic appearances, and the majority of DC being unsupported at home in their school work, the school needs all the help it can get.

Sadly not one parent has volunteered. Not one!!!
So the head asked me (my own DC don't even attend the school).

Many a time I have questioned what on earth I'm doing, both in terms of the fact that I have no qualifications, and also what the fuck is the point if the parents don't bother...but the head keeps talking me into continuing.

RomanKindle's got a good point - I always maintained that I had to sign my own reading card (ie forge my mum's signature) because no one would listen to me read.
My mum's side of the story is that I used to follow her around and read the book to her about 8 times, and keep nagging her to listen to me read even though I had already read it to her.

I don't remember ever sitting with my mum and reading, so both sides might be true - that she would listen as I followed her round, and I interpreted that as her not listening.

iloverainbows - i couldn't agree more.
Reading is probably the most important skill a child can learn, and pushing it out of the way for anything else is just ridiculous.
:(

Beracroo you are missing my point. Its not about the diary. The programme we are working on is for specific children who know the rocket words but are struggling to read fluently.

The children take home a text that the parent needs to read with them, then they read it with me in the next session. I work with 10 children. There are 2 or 3 I know have read the text at home with their parents because you can tell they are not looking at a brand new text. The other have not read the text with thier parents and that is obvious.

I have a child with SN, severe enough that we are considering a SS because MS isnt working and he is only in reception so I do understand. But I also understand that all the other 7 children who havent read the text before dont all have dyslexia or any other SN. Sometimes its just because parents dont want to read with them, these are the parents I am talking about.

I read with my ds1 till I am blue in the face it doesnt help

I am sorry, but you are NOT qualified to say whether some of those kids have SEN/SN or not, only that they do not in your opinion Do you have access to their school file???!

And, as other posters have said, assuming the parents just "dont want to" is spurious....you simply dont know enough about these families and their dynamic to make a judgement like that.

Yes, of course there are kids whose parents dont care but I genuinely think they are in the minority and I would posit that most parents are put off reading with their kids in case they "do it wrong" and struggle to get their dc to read the (bloody awful) reading scheme books....so much pressure from such a young age re: literacy in this country and yet we are at the bottom of all the league tables for literacy worldwide....why is that do you think?

Yabvvvu.
Have you ever tried getting a child with ADHD to sit and read every nite??! Thought not. So take your judges pants off people. Sometimes there's more to situations than meets the eye!

ah, but the OP knows the kids dont have SEN?SN!!!

sigh.

Oh I see well OP should've mentioned she was a paediatrician or ed pysch and that she is qualified in diagnosing children with hidden disabilities such as APD, adhd, add, asd, spd etc etc

For what its worth my parents rarely read with me and I have a degree with first class honours

Well I've clearly got it all wrong.

The pupils in the school where I volunteer have perfectly supportive parents who all have genuine reasons why they don't read to or with their DC, don't ensure homework is completed (nay attempted), don't volunteer to hear reading themselves (or accompany any school trip), don't turn up at parents evenings...etc etc

Maamoo - Yes I have thanks.

Statistically speaking, its highly unlikely that all 7 children from one class have a SEN, that is what I am trying to say. I didnt say I knew whether they had SEN or not.

You are not understanding what I am saying. I am explaining that the programme we are on requires the parents to agree to read with the child at home. I would never sign up for a programme for this with my DS because I know we wouldnt be able to do it. But these parents have agreed to their child taking part in the programme, and the extra work it entails.

Wordfactory, my genuine reason for not helping out in my child's school is because I don't agree that parents should volunteer in their own child's school. You seem to be implying that this is something parents should be doing and that we should all have some kind of excuse ready.

OP, if parents signed up to do something, they should do it. But I have to wonder why schools are setting up reading support programmes that can't be done within schools, as parental support will be highly variable.

It might look from my sons reading diary like we don't read a lot, but we do. I only write in the diary when he has been reading the books brought home from school, which is 2-3 times per week.

But on top of this he reads comics, other story books (more me reading to him) and childrens books in my mothers tounge.

So not writing a lot in the reading diary does not mean you never read!

This is the must for every children. This will help them to increase the confident among them. Really a Good Program to support.

Hmmm... maybe I will offer to listen to reading next year.
Definitely in DC own school, though.
I don't often write in the reading diary, either, and I don't push other homework (if DC resist hard I don't make them).
Occasionally I've had someone say "Well done you!" when I was listening to DC reading in public. Ironic, since I was mostly actually doing speech therapy exercises or just trying to keep hyperactive DC from running around the room driving everyone else nuts.

I just have to point out on that Literacy Trust link, re 3/10 children having no books in the home -- actually, 3/10 said they didn't own their own books. They may still have family books or library books they can access. DC typically have about 10 library books out at any one time.

millyr whether you help out at your DC's school is entirely a matter for you.
I've no idea whether your school needs the help or not.
My own DC's school has so many teachers and TAs that pupils are listened to every single day and the vast majority are read to/with/listened to at home.
The school therefore see no need for volunteers.

But the school I've been talking about has no such resources and the HT and all the teachers are desperate for volunteers. The reality is that given the parents dont/won't read with their DC at home and the teacher simply cannot read with them every day due to numbers and lack of TA support, these DC are not making the progress they should.

This cannot be due to the entire class having SEN or being of low ability. These are great little kids, plenty of bright little sparks in there. But they are underperforming through no fault of their own...so when asked to help, it seemed churlish to say no.