For getting annoyed by my mum saying "college" all the time??

[movember]

Sounds a bit petty but my mum constantly refers to University as "college". Maybe I am being anal about it (probably) but I come from a non academic family. Out of 7 siblings, only one aunt actually went to university (and none of my 12 cousins have either so it was always a bit of a battle against the odds for me. I'm not massively academic so it took alot to actually get IN university, 2 years of education just to get to interview. Then I had to apply amongst 800 people for 200 places. I was one of the successful ones but it was bloody hard and I am proud of myself for getting in.

It's a big deal for me.

Yet my mum constantly refers to it as college and talks about it as if it's just a few gcses Im doing (its a science degree). I and my sister correct her all the time but she does it that often I'm sure she's doing it on purpose.

Yesterday for instance:

mum - "what were you doing on the 26th?"
me - "it's a night out with people from uni"
mum - "oh yes, you're going out with your college friends."

I don't always correct her because I think it sounds a bit twattish but why does she do it??

I constantly get "oh, are you at college today? do you have an assignment to do over the weekend?"

errr ... I have an assignment to do over the next 3 months, not the fecking weekend.

It could be put down to her having no experience of academic stuff but it's SO annoying and she manages to get everyone's place of education right! for instance "oh when your sister finishes college she might go to uni!" hmm you sure she won't just stay at "college" forever? grrrr

I think it is a generational thing.

I actually heard the flipside of this conversation on a bus the other day. Two elderly ladies were talking about one of their granddaughters who kept correcting her grandmother whenever she said 'college' and getting cross because she was at university.

They thought it was silly because "it was always just called college in my day".

My mother insists on calling my University a Poly.

Grips my shit.

YANBU

I went to a college (medical school which was later amalgamated as part the London university/ies but was independent when I qualified) so to me college = university ... sorry

What the hell is wrong with Uni?? - it's no different than shortening any other long word such as Television/TV.

I see the Oxbridge observation has already been made....in which case, I have nothing more to add.

FWIW I feel neither clever nor important, MrsB, just a comp school girl got lucky with the right teacher support. I worked fecking hard at college university and it's not something I throw into conversation. Many people I've met since don't have a clue where I went to college university.

Because it IRRITATES ME!!!

I went to university and called it college at the time because it was a college of the university and in the 80s people talked about college. "Uni" is a fairly new slang and "university" just had too many syllables to bother with.

It not that new. I started Uni in 1983 and we called it uni then

YANBU.

Tell her if she doesn't start calling it university then you won't invite her to your graduation.

Why shouldn't someone mention the name of the place where they went to university though? If someone says they were at Oxford, that's not showing off, it's just a fact.

Well, on the face of it the OP sounds a little pedantic, but if her mum is being unsupportive of her hard work and achievement, and this is coming out in snide dismissive comments, then I can see why it would really grate. Might there be an element of "it's not for the likes of us" coming from her?

BTW I've never understood the vitriol directed at Oxbridge. Why do people seem to hate it so much? They're just universities (although admittedly harder to get into than some of the others).

If my mum had gone round correcting anyone who said I was at college with a "no she's at UNIVERSITY" I'd have found it really embarassing. It does smack a bit of wanting reflected glory and "college" not being a grand enough word. To me college and university are synonymous. People who knew me knew I was doing a degree, I didn't care what the people who didn't know me thought I was doing.

DH and I and 50ish. We both went to College. When people ask him where he nonchalantly tell them as if it were no big deal (Oxbridge College); when people ask me I say xxx Polytechnic and they say something like "fantastic place to be in your teens".

Not a big deal at all. College covers a variety of institutions in a generic sort of way. I think saying uni is a bit affected. We expect the DC to go to College - not specifying which sort here - not relevant.

Uni is a very commonly used abbreviation of university. People say it all over the place. It is not an Australian thing and its usage isn't related to Neighbours. I do find it strange how weird and wanky some people are about others using it.

unassumingtroll - it's not you and people like you I'm having a prod at in the sorts of situations I'm describing. I work with a lot of Oxbridge people, some of whom can be pretty much up themselves (actually being up yourself isn't confined to people who went to Oxbridge in general, just for the purposes of this thread). So if the time and circumstances seem to be right to have a little prick at their balloon, for the purposes of my personal entertainment, I might (all other things being equal) choose to amuse myself. It wouldn't work with you, because you are clearly not the kind of pompous arse I sometimes have to deal with.

But anyway I am putting all this forward as my personal bit of evidence to suggest that 'college' versus 'university' has to do with social class ... although there's something to be said for Irishness and generation as well, probably, as other posters pointed out.

whatdoIknowanyway makes sort of a similar point in reverse when saying 'I always refer to college so as not to make my friends who didn't do HE feel bad'

Oh wtf...Get with the times people. It's called UNI....and a dissertation is called a DISSO

Towndon - exactly! I've spent the last decade dreading social situations where I may be asked where I went to college (sorr, university!). The minute I say Cambridge, it all starts - you can almost play response bingo:

"Yeah, I could have gone there, but I deliberately didn't apply because it's full of twats, etc"
"I've met loads of Oxbridge people at work, and most of them have zero common sense blah blah"
"My cousin went there and hated it"

Like I care!!

If you couple it with the fact that I have a geordie accent, most people think I am lying anyway

ZombiePlan - people who hate Oxbridge are mostly just annoyed they didn't get in themselves. Like me

Don't think I've forgotten the names of the two dons who interviewed me - I ain't [looks menacing]. I am looking forward to coming across them in later life when I am President of the World and they are drawing on their meagre academic pensions ...

If it annoys you, and you have clearly pointed out many, many times that it's University (as you clearly have) then just play ignorant when she refers to it as college.

'College friends' - ' What College friends? I dont' have any college friends?' and leave it at that.

See what happens when you deliberately misunderstand her!!

@ MrsBaldwin

I'm at a post '92 uni - i.e. an ex polytechnic - but I tend to refer to it as being at/going to college... My DH refers to it by it's old polytechnic name as he went to a RG university and considers anything less than that as very third rate...

My Mum hasn't a clue what I'm doing or what the workload entails or why I'm doing it but it doesn't matter and I don't take that as lack of support. I'm there for me, nobody else, so what they call it or whether they understand what I'm studying or how much work I have to do is irrelevant .

Maryz, I went to Trinity too but didn't everyone call it college? Everyone I knew at UCD/UCC etc would have gone to college. I don't think it's a Trinity thing.

I dont think you are BU to be annoyed by it. My mum does it too (when she deigns to mention that I am studying).

She always says its not worth it, which annoys me immensely. She puts it across to people as if Ive found a little interest course to do at the local learning centre, and Im earning myself some pin money.

Im a PhD student and Im being intereviewed for a senior management post this week.

I genuinely think she doesnt understand anything about what I do but it does feel demeaning/belittling to me. I cope by taking a deep breath, smiling, and remembering there are a whole load of people out there who do recognise what I am doing. Can you do the same?

You're going to be one of those people who writes the letters after their name aren't you?

KittyAnne BSc (Hons) MA (Hons)

Good point KittyAnne. I have a colleague who does that and it irritates me hugely - they are always the ones who have a degree in diddlysquat, post 1995, from an ex poly or fe college and who believe they are very very important. I have one who since she got married signs herself as Mrs Jane Smith, BA (Hons), MA (Hons), MABCDE, Job title in bold. FFS.

I think I will have to have a little word.