to ask someone to break into my home to scare DDs?

[ThoughtCriminal]

When DH and I went away in the summer for a week we returned (very early morning) to find one of the windows open while teenage DDs age 18 and 19 were in bed asleep. What infuriates me is that anything could have happened to them and they don't seem to care. They told me it was a one-off but I don't believe them.

We are planning to leave them again for a couple of nights over Christmas and I just KNOW they will do it again because many mornings I have come down to find the back door unlocked when one of them has stayed up late.

I said to DH that when we are next away I am going to ask someone to act as a masked intruder to enter the house through the open window to scare them into realising how serious this is. I am prepared to pay them.

DH thinks I'm stark raving bonkers to be thinking of doing this. I don't think he cares as much as I do. AIBU?

YABU

You are mad.

YABU

Slightly bonkers yes... supposing one of your kids goes for them with a knife or some other weapon thinking they need to protect themselves.

I would be getting a house sitter in, as your kids are clearly not mature enough to take the responsibility...or I would lock all downstairs windows and hide the key.

YABVU

Seriously?? if so YABU

Em... are you serious? This sounds mental!

YABU. Not funny and rather cruel.

Yabu

YABU.

YABU. And your DH is right.

Are you serious? What do you have planned for when one your daughter's stabs this masked intruder to death?

YABU and I agree with your dh. Couldn't you just leave post it note reminders everywhere?

Yes, you are bonkers I'm afraid. i understand your frustration, and your desire to teach them a lesson in a controlled way, but a friend of mine's DD (aged about 17/18 at the time) hid in a wardrobe for half an hour while she heard two intruders ransacking her house, including her bedroom inches away from where she was hiding. She has, understandably, been totally traumatised by the experience - it has affected the whole family hugely. Don't do it.

YABU

Seriously?? That is the maddest idea in the whole of Mad Idea Land.

Yes. And I think your husband does care. He cares your kids don't freak out.

What will this intruder do? Wake them up and scare the pants of them? Nick stuff?

You'll look good to the police when they call 999 or attack the intruder and leave them injured. The local press will adore this story.

If my mother ever did that to me I'd never forget, never forgive and think she was crazy.

Text them each night or ask a neighbour to check on them.

I'd have thought that a house sitter or treating them as the younger children they are behaving like might be wiser... but then I assume that you're not serious about your wish either.

YABU. They would be terrified beyond belief and may never forgive you. You should rethink your plan to leave them alone or get a responsible adult to look after the house.

May I just say again you are mad. I hope this is some kind of weird reverse thread and it's actually your husband who wants to do this and you are trying to prove he is mad.

Your daughters will be traumatised and never trust you again. Is your proposed masked intruder prepared to do time? Are you?

That is absolutely horrible. I totally understand your worries, I am also lax about security and my DP gets really frustrated with me but fgs that is crazy. What would your masked intruder do to alert the girls? It would be terrifying and the fact that you are considering paying someone is very odd. Who on earth would do that??

I worry so much but they just laugh at me! I would just hate for anything to happen while we are away I only want to scare them. I was thinking of asking my DB. He could use the money.

Goodness, really? yABU. But you know that, right?

We always sleep with windows open (on the first floor). Where do you live that is so dangerous?