Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

erm.. chocolate finger for 10 month old at nursery?

355 replies

DuelingFanjo · 31/10/2011 18:31

I didn't put anything on his form saying that I didn't want him to have cakes/biscuits/chocolate so maybe I am being unreasonable but I was a bit Shock to be told that the nursery had given DS a chocolate finger today. I said 'oh, really?' but now I am home I think that actually I am stupid for not saying something and now I feel annoyed with them and annoyed with myself.

What to do Sad? I have to say something. I was told that they feed the babies healthy food, no juice and so on so I thought they might know that chocoloate fingers for a baby that old is not normal? Or is it? Am I the weird one?

It's a good nursery, highly recommended and they haven't done anything I don't like before.

OP posts:
larrygrylls · 01/11/2011 10:57

"well my dd is also 10mths and i wouldnt be happy if someone gave her a chocolate finger, there is NO need!"

There is no need for any foodstuff in isolation. If you don't have an "all foods are OK but in appropriate quantities" philosophy, what happens later on? You create "naughty" foods which children gorge on in secret and later on all kinds of dietary disorders. I wish people would get a grip on basic principles of nutrition (fats, carbs, proteins, micronutrients etc) and that all children are not the same.

Everyone has the right to feed their children (or tell someone else to feed them) whatever they want but it is not necessarily making their child healthier or, more importantly, giving them a healthy attitude towards food. I always feel sorry for the toddlers being fed rice cakes when they go out to birthday parties and all the other children are enjoying proper cake. Food is also one of life's pleasures.

Groovee · 01/11/2011 10:58

As a nursery nurse, I've often seen requests for no chocolate/cakes/sweet things to be given to children. Though most bring it up in the settling in sessions. You'd be best to get it sorted before the christmas party if you really don't want any more "treats" to be given. I'd also ask about birthday cake. It could be they are given that at a birthday too.

choceyes · 01/11/2011 10:58

YANBU OP.

I am that poster who didn't like her DD of 14 months been given jam sandwiches at nursery, so obviously I agree with you that your nursery WBU giving your DD a chocolate finger.

We also as a family eat pretty healthy with the occassional sweet stuff (90% healthy 10% not) and that's how I'd like my DCs to eat as well, so it' not like banning all sweet stuff.

Nurseries should be giving healthy foods, and a chocolate finger even occasionally is just laziness on their part.

Yesterday my DD of 14 months had some party food, a bit of cake and a few quavers, and that's fine, as it was a halloween party and she is now of an age that she knows what everyone else is having and she wants a bit of it too. But if it happened regularly then it's not acceptable.

My DS of nearly 3yrs has been having far too much sweet stuff recently (parties, treats out, and potty training bribery) and has been off his normal diet and harldy touching fruit or veg and suffered from bad constipation for the first time at the weekend. I let him have a toffe apple yesterday for halloween, but for the next few days I shall not be giving him anymore sugar till he is back on his normal diet and his food fussiness is gone. It's true that too much sugar can make a chiuld fussy with food. But occasional sugar at his age is fine ofcourse.
But not at 10 months. OP I totally get what you are saying.

PerryCombover · 01/11/2011 11:02

choceyes
I'm concerned that you restrict sweet food but then use it as reward for things like potty training
whole world of trouble to come with that one

choceyes · 01/11/2011 11:04

chocolate buttons are well known to be very useful in potty training perrycombover!

Although it didn't really help with the potty training, it was an unsuccessful attempt this time.

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:06

"You create "naughty" foods which children gorge on in secret and later on all kinds of dietary disorders."

See I knew it would come up! :) We're talking about a 10 month old here not a 10 yo! They don't even know that type of food exists never mind understanding the concept of it being 'naughty'. If you want to feed your children sweets, crisps and chocolate from weaning age then go ahead but it will not damage a child physically or psychologically to not have those things in their early years.

Btw DF we had a lovely carrot and apple first birthday cake with no sugar. It was really scummy!

Original poster
DuelingFanjo · 01/11/2011 11:07

it is all about moderation. He's 10 months and I am moderating his chocolate intake.

OP posts:
larrygrylls · 01/11/2011 11:08

Scummy sounds about right!

Slilou · 01/11/2011 11:08

OP i am quite lentilly, and have lentilly values. many people on MN dont. most people in the supermarkets dont. even those with children. just take a look in people's trolleys. or in most dc's lunchboxes.

so.....dont be surprised that most people on here dont share your views on food Smile. i'm not.

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:10

Hehe Grin typo. Clearly I meant SCRUMMY :) and it was!

microfight · 01/11/2011 11:11

YAB a bit U

I believe it's better for them to learn about chocolate and sweet treats in moderation as early as it's safe to do so and it's around them. You can't underestimate how clever babies and toddlers are, they will know they are missing out on something before you know it.

In my experience many of the children who aren't allowed any chocolate/cake end up scoffing much much more than those whose parents have a more relaxed attitude. You can almost tell at parties which kids aren't allowed many treats by the way the devour the sweets.

Forbidden fruits!

choceyes · 01/11/2011 11:12

I admit to being lentilly as well. Infact I made a lentil soup at the weekend and DD hoovered it up which is more than she did when presented with chocolate cake the other day.Smile

larrygrylls · 01/11/2011 11:15

"See I knew it would come up!"

Sure, I know he is 10 months now, but at some point I assume you are going to introduce what you would probably consider "naughty" foods. When are you going to do it and how? As soon as you even have the concept in your own head of "good" and "bad" foods, you are going to project it onto your children. If they have always had a small slice of cake at the weekend for tea or a piece of chocolate money after dinner, then they will not suddenly be introduced to this amazing new food. They will just associate it as a very tiny part of a normal diet, to be eaten after dinner.

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:15

Rubbish! The ones who gorge themselves at parties are the greedy ones! It doesn't matter if they're allowed sweets or not. All children should be taught manners. I dislike children grabbing fistfuls of food and gorging themselves at parties.

choceyes · 01/11/2011 11:15

I don't agree with the forbidden fruit theory. Both mine and DH's families are healthy eaters, and we weren't given much sweet things as children (so they say)...and neither of us have sweet teeth. We'd rather have a savoury snack than a sweet one.

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:16

Well that's your way of doing things lorry and I'm glad it's worked for you. Our way has worked out fine for us :)

Original poster
DuelingFanjo · 01/11/2011 11:16

"I always feel sorry for the toddlers being fed rice cakes when they go out to birthday parties and all the other children are enjoying proper cake. Food is also one of life's pleasures"

Larry - out of interest can you tell me at what point (age) it becomes something to feel sorry about? You say toddlers. I can't imagine not allowing DS to have cake when he's a toddler, even I with my wild lentil weaving ideas about babies and chocolate can see that it would be strange to deny a toddler some cake but DS is 10 months old and not, AFAIAC, a toddler yet. Maybe at 2 I will feel more relaxed about it but don't you se there is a difference between a 10 month old and a toddler?

OP posts:
bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:16

Larry* stupid autocorrect!

Slilou · 01/11/2011 11:17

choceye me too- yum!

and my dds complain if i cook white rice instead of brown

ps we also love puddings and chocolate. just not for babies, imo

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:18

What makes you think rice cakes and fruit/veggies etc aren't enjoyable anyway? My boys love them.

larrygrylls · 01/11/2011 11:20

DF,

Yes, but what when you have number 2 and his toddler brother is eating cake and he is 10 months old, sitting in his high chair and reaching out enthusiastically?

I just don't actually see a small amount of choc as unhealthy. It should def be a small amount ( a choc finger prob has 40 claories or 4% of his daily requirement). I would take a dif attitude to crisps, as young babies are v susceptible to salt,

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:22

You have something else to hand them instead.....DS2 would happily tuck into a big bowl of fruit and yoghurt if we happened to be having cake and ice cream.

bumbleymummy · 01/11/2011 11:23

Do you let your youngest play with the same toys/go down the big slide because their older sibling does? Somethings are just for 'when you're older'.

PerryCombover · 01/11/2011 11:24

choceyes
you do get my point though don't you?
restrict sweet things ordinarily but use them as a reward for good or desired behaviour...er?

4madboys · 01/11/2011 11:24

well i have 5 children, eldest is 12, then 9 then almost 7, then 3 and 10mths i didnt give any of them chocolate etc under one and when we did introduce it was just here and there, not loads of it, yes once they are 2 or 3 and start going to parties etc then they do eat chocolate and biscuits and we make them at home and have them ourselves. but its just a nice extra in their diet, they all seem to have a healthy attitude towards food so far, we have taken a no-nonsense approach when it comes to food and we cook one meal and sit and eat it round the table etc, they either eat or go hungry i am not cooking various diff meal. they have all gone through fussy stages, esp ds4 but he is now coming out the other side, slowly! they went trick or treating and to a halloween party last night, they had their dinner and then they had a muffin each and some sweets, we only went to 5 houses so they got a few sweets each which are sat in a tub and they will have one when they feel like it/remember to ask and after dinner!

we just have a realistic attitude to food, that food i fuel, with 4 growing and energetic boys, that is exactly what food is! so they eat healthily with treats as well, we might have popcorn with a film, or pudding when friends come over (pudding certainly isnt a regular thing) they get pocket money and can choose to buy sweets, sometimes they do and tho one would rather buy match attacks and another anything with tinkerbell on it.

sweets and treats are nice but so is all sorts of food, one of my boys loves chilli, its his fave and he would choose it over chocolate or sweets, another ones loves cauliflower and broccoli cheese.

food in our house is fuel and also something of a family occasion, we sit round the table, the kids help cook etc and we all enjoy it and thats a bit of everything in moderation and sweet treats as well but not for a 10mth old who doesnt know what they are, cant ask for them and has no concept of what they are, she eats what we eat meal wise and as she gets older and more interested in what her siblings are eating and once she is walking and running around etc she will get the occasional sweet treat, but when they are little and you CAN make the choices for them, why not make them healthy ones? it hasnt done my 5 any harm.