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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Grrrrrrrrrr bloody housing officer!!!

215 replies

holdenmcgroin1979 · 31/10/2011 15:08

Came round today saying i have two weeks to sort my front and back garden out and tidy it up or else! He knows i have been suffering with severe anxiety after having a bad miscariage last year and being pg again has made me a nervous wreck, the neighbours bloody cat has shit on the gravel in my front garden, wouldnt be so bad but he had the cheek to blame my moggies even thought he knows i keep them inside due to said neighbours cat attacking them everytime they are outside. I am expected to clear up fag butts that people have thrown over my hedge as well. My back garden isnt that bad to be honest it's just a few kids toys a bit of weeding and the grass that needs cutting but it's all stuff that involves heavy lifting or being in contact with soil which could have cat poo in it!! So cheesed off right now so this isn't so much an AIBU but a good old rant. Not expecting sympathy just wanted to get it off my chest!

OP posts:
oksonowwhat · 31/10/2011 19:04

swankyswishing....oh thats made me abit cross actually!!! I work all the hours god sends, yes double shifts the lot. I wish more than anything i had a spare hour or two to do something to the garden, but NO i don't. Money comes first as i have to keep this roof over my head.

I keep it as respectable as possible but that means going out at midnight sometimes in the summer, the neighbours certainly don't appreciate my late night lawnmowing thats for sure!

Don't preach, you have no idea. You have no idea of the OPs situation, anxiety can be very serious indeed.

Serenitysutton · 31/10/2011 19:04

I imagine it's the council- HAs are companies who provide low cost housing, they vary in quality but won't usually be as attentive as the council- maybe people aren't aware but many don't have long waiting lists? Or any waiting list in some cases. Anyway, tbh I suspect he has a point, as he can only ensure the areas are kept clean, after all a scruffy neighbourhood brings with it all sorts of problems; so it's In evryones best interest to keep it clean and maintained. However if he is UR I would take pictures of the garden the day he inspected and put ina complaint about him. If it's upheld I'm afraid it probably worse than you think. If he's taking the piss they'll load a bigger patch onhim sharpish so he has no time to be worrying about your 3 toys.

Fags from next door- chuck bck over and make another complaint against the resident there. Good luck! Eveyone has shit times and it seems you've been through the mill but you can't use it as a reason to ignore your responsiblities. I'm sorry for your medical issues but that won't be an acceptable excuse for your landlord.

PrincessJenga · 31/10/2011 19:04

Can you put a positive spin on it? You're expecting a baby? You'll want somewhere nice for him/her to play in when they're older? May as well get the garden sorted now then... rope in some friends, invest in some rubber gloves and get out there and clear it up.

SansaLannister · 31/10/2011 19:05

And decent housing can be had in private tenancy as well, but without the security of social housing. And believe me, there are plenty of people who are forced to go private, by the council even, because there are not enough council properties to go round. Such people have to use rent bond schemes and find a LL willing to take HB or use one from a council list or wait ages in homeless housing.

So yeah, after having been in homeless accommodation, I find this flat a privilege. I'd be willing to swap it for a house with a garden, too.

Swankyswishing · 31/10/2011 19:05

oksonowwhat, many homeowners work the hours you describe, and suffer from anxiety and - guess what - we generally manage to keep our gardens tidy. Is working long hours and anxiety an excuse to dump old mattresses and rubbish in the garden? Or allow the grass to grow almost as tall as the house? No!

Original poster
holdenmcgroin1979 · 31/10/2011 19:07

i will message you the LA i am under OK.

OP posts:
Swankyswishing · 31/10/2011 19:07

usualsuspect, speaking like a stereotypical council housing tenant there! Classy!

IneedAbetterNickname · 31/10/2011 19:08

holden your local ha work differently to ours then! Our are really strict! You can't put pictures or anything up until your probabtion period is over.

ANyhows, hope you get it all sorted! The anxiety as much as the garden.

xyz2011 · 31/10/2011 19:09

YABU, it sounds to me like everyone else is responsible for the mess inside your boundaries except for you!!!

oksonowwhat · 31/10/2011 19:10

I didn't see the op mention mattress or any of that?? Have i not read the thread properly??

Actually i work double shifts, day and night i have two hours off a day. Pretty hard to do anything with that time. But saying that, my gardens ok. We are talking about the op here. I work with adults with severe anxiety problems, it can be a very dangerous and life threatening situation. I should think the op has a little more on her plate than abit of gardening to worry about.

Also, as i work in conjunction with a HA i know that most HA's will help out in this sort of situation.

Your tone is very rude and abrupt.

dreamingofsun · 31/10/2011 19:10

she's a single parent with 4 children and another on the way ....its no wonder she's stressed with an untidy garden.

Serenitysutton · 31/10/2011 19:11

Fwiw most council tenants are elderly, and probbaly more like your grandma than vicky pollard. Talk about generalisation.

Swankyswishing · 31/10/2011 19:12

oksonowwhat and your tone is defensive!

Original poster
holdenmcgroin1979 · 31/10/2011 19:14

Please dont be fighting, i didnt want this to be the reason people fall out.

OP posts:
Serenitysutton · 31/10/2011 19:14

Oksonowwhat you really need to cut back those hours, you are going to make yourself Ill. Noone can function on that. If is for Money and this isn't a short term solution could you do something bêtter paid? Those hours are not sutainable LT and I'm surprised a LA/ charity would allow you to do them

oksonowwhat · 31/10/2011 19:14

I work in a mental health HA situation so i know what can happen if someone like the op is not supported. I understand the seriousness of what could/may happen and if that makes me sound defensive then i'm sorry. We had a young mother take her own life last month. Very sad indeed.

Haka · 31/10/2011 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Swankyswishing · 31/10/2011 19:16

oksonowwhat, why are you assuming that I have never had, or know nothing about, anxiety issues?

oksonowwhat · 31/10/2011 19:16

serenity, i know, its not good and i am working at changing it. Just doing a qualification at work that i'm hoping will lead to a better paid position. Ex left me with big debts so i'm trying to pay all that back too.

perplexedpirate · 31/10/2011 19:17

Affordable housing a privilege? So what happens to the people who don't "deserve" that privilege? People with messy gardens, or washing machines at the front, or cars with no wheel on the drive? Do they get made homeless for being messy? Yeah, cos that makes loads of sense.
I used to be an HO and I left because I was sick on the attitude of the social landlord I worked for, they were into every aspect of their tenants lives. I would also be very reluctant to move into one of their properties, not because of the condition or location, but because I wouldn't be able to stand having my life judged by some jumped up prick in a cheap suit (aka, past life me!)>

oksonowwhat · 31/10/2011 19:17

Because you could be tipping her over the edge the way you are talking. You may have suffered yourself then but you've clearly had no training.

Serenitysutton · 31/10/2011 19:19

Erm yes now you've said where you work I can see why. You poor sod. Let's hope it turns around soon. SS - I just don't know how they gt away with it. I have a friend doing similar. She can barely get a holiday.

oksonowwhat · 31/10/2011 19:21

holden, i won't argue back anymoreSmile i promise

woollyideas · 31/10/2011 19:23

Swanky, why don't you lay off? Your lack of sensitivity is appalling.
By the way, I'm another home owner who has three feet high grass and weeds. I also have a full time job, am doing an Open University course and am a single parent to a teenager. You really think my weeds are a priority?

Judge not, etc...

Original poster
holdenmcgroin1979 · 31/10/2011 19:25

I am not bad enough to do anything like leave my kids without a mum, i live for them and they are the reason i get up in the morning.

OK your right i didnt mention a mattress as the only ones i have are on mine and my childrens beds, the only rubbish i have is weeds and the grass once it's cut the grass isnt high, no higher than maybe 3-4 inches but with having an uneven garden it's hard to judge, and like i said my kids toys and a covered over BBQ this is the back garden. The front garden has the fag butts that people have thrown over and the said cat poo from next doors cat. My bins are kept outside the front but thats all there is at the front no rubbish or garden waste.

OP posts: