The great Event Tent debacle....firstly there are TWO tents in this story, only one makes an actual appearance, but the other one exists in a shed somewhere. One is a modern, with plastic windows type, the other is your traditional massive canvas affair that belongs to the local community. The one that makes an appearance is the modern one, which belongs to a lovely elderly local lady...who also has had possession of the canvas one for years as she is on the 'community council'.
Mr and Mrs Urine Extracting Neighbours are VERY class conscious and will not speak to anyone in the village who they deem to be 'not on their level'...very wanky behaviour IMO, they prefer to hob-nob with the MC villagers only...horrible thought just occurred to me, they think we are like them'? Noooooooo. We have been great friends with Mr and Mrs Lovely Neighbours, local to the bone, since we arrived. Mr and Mrs UEN's don't even acknowledge Mr and Mrs LN.
DH and I love a party...we planned a whole village invited, kid friendly, food and drink provided, just come and have a laugh, type event. However, weather up here is notorious for ruining most, if not all social events, so, Mr and Mrs Lovely Neighbours offered the big plastic marquee type tent for the garden, which belonged to their M.I.L, and moreover appeared with tent on day of party and helped set it up.
It turned into 24 hour massive party-a-thon in the end, and we loved every minute...as did the guests. Mrs and Mrs UEN and their DC's turned up early, horsed into the free food and drink. Left their DC's unsupervised so that we, and other guests, had to watch out for them. Mr UEN started an argument about politics, sigh, and finally pissed off in a huff around 5am (Mr and Mrs UEN had been taking 'turns' to be with DC's now at home). There wasn't a drop of rain the whole evening in the end, but the village teens took over the tent for their own shenanigans.
DH and I carefully dismantled the tent the following day and repacked it away with the type of care only usually found amongst the most anally-retentive...I'm talking hospital corners here! This is because we believe if someone is kind enough to loan you something you should treat their kindness/belongings with respect. We returned the tent personally, with a box 'o' chocs and a bottle of wine for LN's M.I.L.
Fast forward some months where UEN's decided to have a 'Do...they approached LN's to ask for Event Tent that 'Mr and Mrs PoL borrowed'...Mrs LN agreed despite the request ending in a, thrown over shoulder as leaving, very half-hearted, 'its an open house'...'maybe see you there even if you can't get the tent'. Mrs LN felt very unwelcome.
Time passed and UEN's 'Do was coming ever closer...but made no attempt to contact LN's and arrange to collect tent. Mrs LN, with my support, did not rush to deliver it to door of UEN's. Mrs UEN, this was pre-balls period, took every opportunity to drop in on us and mention that they needed the event tent, hoping I would speak to Mrs LN and gee them up?
One day Mrs UEN waits outside her house to catch Mrs LN after school-run, quizzing her about non-appearance of tent and advised that she would pay a few pounds to community fund for tent...Mrs LN showed great restraint in not saying 'THAT tent is NOT the tent you are looking for'...at some point after this UEN's took tent from LN's garage while they were out.
Finally, on the morning of UEN's 'Do, the weather was looking decidedly dodgy and my DH took our DC's to their house to offer to help put tent up. Mrs UEN answered door and said 'No, not today thank you' and pretended?! to shut door in their faces. DH and DC's were, grudgingly, allowed into UEN's garage ( ChaoticAngelofSamhain there's a pattern appearing here!) and given some paper and pens...(for DC's OBVIOUSLY!)
Mr UEN said about DH's offer to help 'no, we decided not to bother with tent'. UEN's family turned up and, as DH put it, the pens and paper were whisked away and it was made very clear he was to fuck off (with not so much as a coffee offered).
Cue TORRENTIAL rain, the likes of which is rare, even in these here parts. We get on with our day, and come dinner time the phonecall comes...answerphone picks it up...it's Mr UEN, 'Seeing as you're (DH) the expert on putting up this tent can you come and help us'...we ignored message...nascent balls even then. I do admit to having a look out the window towards UEN's house as they tried to put up tent in gale force winds and rain of biblical proportions. Oh, how I chuckled!
DH and I, with DC's, went down at the appointed hour to find no-one home...UEN's and family were out for dinner with family, we knew this was planned but had been assured that everyone would be back at a certain time that would allow us to spend time there with DC's before taking them home for bed...we waited a little while and some other locals with their DC's arrived, still no sign of UEN's. We, and other locals, eventually gave up and went home. DC's very disappointed. DH and I opened a bottle of red.
At some point later that evening the Police were called to the party and told UEN's to put music off (WASN'T us, honest) and party was all over before Midnight.
The event tent was EVENTUALLY returned, still sodden, and stuffed into several black bin bags. No thank you, verbal or otherwise.
This is the abridged version!
Mrs UEN was VERY rude to, and about, Mr and Mrs Lovely Neighbours throughout...and to date the only time Mrs UEN has been in LN's house, or spoken to her, was to ask for demand tent. Thankfully now a visit from UEN's is a rare occurrence...MN win...my eternal gratitude for the humourous laugh at yourself therapy received. Most cathartic and highly recommended 
.