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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My ex-h thinks he cannot live on £900 a month (-£400 for rent) aibu to think that many single people manage this?

116 replies

FinneganBeginAgain · 13/10/2011 18:52

Title says it all really. I've been getting a sob story about how poor he is and I just feel he's not in the real world. Aibu? Help me adjust my sympathy levels if I am!

OP posts:
NinkyNonker · 13/10/2011 18:54

Depends really, what other outgoings does he have? Bills, council tax, rates etc... £500 p/m isn't a lot if it covers everything.

Northernlurker · 13/10/2011 18:56

Well it's not a fortune - but then what are you living off?

squeakytoy · 13/10/2011 18:56

It isnt a lot of money, no. But if he has children, then he still has the responsibility to pay what he can towards them.

He also has the option to look for a better job, or get a flat share with a friend, which is what a lot of people on low income have to do.

PeneloPeePitstop · 13/10/2011 18:57

Yep, once you take bills out of that he won't be able to heat or eat tbh.
Maybe houseshares would be a better option so he can fulfil his obligations to his children.

worraliberty · 13/10/2011 18:58

£125 per week isn't much if he has credit cards and a car for example

Take out Food, Gas, Electric, TV Licence, Water Rates, Council Tax, Car Tax, Petrol and what are you left with?

FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 18:58

I live on £200 disposable income that has to feed me.

I can do it and I smoke I'm sure he can. Oh and I smoke.

incognitofornow · 13/10/2011 18:58

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FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 18:59

YOu have to consider his council tax, a car if he runs one, a mobile phone contract, fares to work.

ScaredBear · 13/10/2011 18:59

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AuntiePickleBottom · 13/10/2011 19:00

i am a little confused over the title......is that £900 after his rent or before

ScaredBear · 13/10/2011 19:01

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Dawndonna · 13/10/2011 19:02

My son lives on that, and pays his bills, eats and runs a car.

FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 19:02

He earns 900 has to pay 400 rent, but what she has not factored in is council tax costs which would be about 80 or 90 a month, broadband costs, television licence, gas, electricity, food, fares to and from work, money for lunch. If he runs a car car insurance monthly, petrol.

Im single in a house with a dog I earn 600 more a month take home than he does and I only have £200 left after all my bills are paid, out of that £200 I have to feed me and a dog, pay petrol to and from work, get lunch.

Money does not go far.

incognitofornow · 13/10/2011 19:02

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FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 19:03

Oh for god sake she has only taken out his rent, none of you are looking at his other outgoings.

incognitofornow · 13/10/2011 19:03

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PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 13/10/2011 19:03

We don't have that much more than that for a family of six, but there are factors to be considered rather than just a blanket "how much is enough". Where you live, how much council tax, commute, rent, bills - lots and lots of variables. I'd be surprised if a single person couldn't manage on that though.

Original poster
FinneganBeginAgain · 13/10/2011 19:05

£500 after rent and CSA payment. No car. Rest would be for other standard bills for just himself. Problem is I earn a little bit more than him and I'm currently getting a sob story about how poor he is.

OP posts:
PerryCombover · 13/10/2011 19:05

Doesn't sound like a lot to me

incognitofornow · 13/10/2011 19:06

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FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 19:07

He is poor.

Sorry but he is. You have no idea.

He earns around 14,500? Thats not a lot when you have a house to run.

PerryCombover · 13/10/2011 19:07

Just be pleasant and then use the normal calculation for provision for his child/children
Not your place to hear a sob story..things are hard all around..you are to be expected to look after the children whilst your bills raise and I'm sure your payments won't increase
Nod and smile

ScaredBear · 13/10/2011 19:07

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 19:08

Whats this about? He pays CSA are you in a relationship with this guy? Or are you asking him for money when he already pays the CSA?

FabbyChic · 13/10/2011 19:09

Scared depends on your standard of living, feeding a child is cheap until they become a teenager then they eat so much you cannot afford to feed yourself.