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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think pupils at secondary should make their way to school on their own?

226 replies

emkana · 07/10/2011 21:47

be it walking, cycling, or bus - but not driven by their parents anymore. I guess liftsharing with other parents to save money is okay. But parents driving the little darlings every day because they couldn't possibly manage?

OP posts:
MilicentBystander · 08/10/2011 19:17

I think it's quite normal to be concerned that a teenager is not allowed to go out in the rain.

PFB by any chance? Grin

fluffythevampirestabber · 08/10/2011 19:19

You know what.

I'm about to out myself massively.

DS1 and DS2 both did a sport after school every day to national level.

They could have got a bus (lived in a different location at the time) but they were knackered with training to the point of throwing up some days so you know what? If I could I collected them and brought them home.

So, go on then, flame me.

popadop · 08/10/2011 19:19

PFB .......What is that?

MilicentBystander · 08/10/2011 19:20

I thought we'd already established that you live 678 miles from anywhere so need a car?

It's not because they will get wet or dirty or have a bag .

MilicentBystander · 08/10/2011 19:21

Precious First Born Wink

fluffythevampirestabber · 08/10/2011 19:21

Milicent - the point is, when the boys were at school, we lived elsewhere and they could have got a bus.

I chose to collect them when I could because they were knackered, and soaked through with the sport they did and there were no showers available for them to use.

MilicentBystander · 08/10/2011 19:23

I don't get that.My kids have a school bus. It's outside the door and they get on, get off and walk 5 minutes to the house. Even when wet from swimming!

popadop · 08/10/2011 19:23

I suppose some parents put themselves out for their kids and some don't..........

fluffythevampirestabber · 08/10/2011 19:24

do they do an activity to the point where they throw up their lunch?

FlossieFromCrapstonVillas · 08/10/2011 19:26

I'll continue to occasionally take or collect my 11yr old (fit, athletic) son. Threads like this are hilarious!

I'm his Mum, if I jolly well want to ferry him I jolly well will.

ragged · 08/10/2011 19:26

DH was picked up by his mum in the car for lunch any day that it rained whilst in Secondary school, this was 1990, btw, not at all recently! He only lived a 5 minute walk away, too. He's not a PFB, either, just saying that over-protectiveness hardly started recently.

I know a couple who (now) insist that it is ILLEGAL to allow a child under 14yo to be alone, and that includes walking to school alone. Naturally they are very judgey about yr7-9s allowed to travel alone to school. So I reserve my right to be judgey about their judginess, iyswim.

popadop · 08/10/2011 19:28

FLOSSIE........................I so agree with you......................some of the comments make me laugh out loud.

natation · 08/10/2011 19:28

I don't think Millicent... is suggesting that people move to be closer to school, it's just that most people don't live in rural areas and therefore most people do have secondary schools less than 10 miles away, even more likely one less than 5 miles away. These days people are however more mobile, it is indeed a factor in polarising the school system somewhat in the UK, into very sought after and less desirable schools, meaning people no longer accept the free public transport available to schools over 3 miles when it is the designated school and they choose instead another school over 3 miles for which they do not get free transport, and since bus fares include all charges upfront and can seem very expensive (and certainly are, when reading what some pay on this thread), they take instead their cars. Then there are less and less buses going to less and less places, then more people use cars, it's a vicious circle.

But yes when recently having to move house as we couldn't afford the rent, our number one priority was to choose another house convenient to all 3 of our children's schools, plus accessible to work. This certainly wasn't a luxury, having to move.

LittleMissWoodscommaElle · 08/10/2011 19:28

The rules for free school trainsport are much more complicated than that and also don;t account for after school activities

A1980 · 08/10/2011 19:31

Probably been said: but depends where the school is and the area and the transport links.

When I was 11, I did a long walk to the tube station and went half way across London on the tube.

Not gonig to work if you live in a rural area with no buses, etc.

One of my neghbours is ridiculous thoguh, she's been taking and collecting her daughter at secondary school right through fromm 11-16. The school is 15 minutes away by bus.

MilicentBystander · 08/10/2011 19:31

popadop driving your precious only child to school every day in case he gets wet isn't putting yourself out, it's downright laughably pathetic.

I have five kids, don't presume to know how I parent them.

MilicentBystander · 08/10/2011 19:32

And Pop, how do you presume I prevent all my kids from getting wet when they go to different schools? Should I have stuck to the one child to ensure maximum mollycoddling? Hmm

WinnieMac · 08/10/2011 19:34

Milicent, what exactly is your problem?

fluffythevampirestabber · 08/10/2011 19:35

I think the thread title is a sweeping generalisation tbh.

In an ideal world there would be adequate transport to ensure kids get to and from school.

But life doesn't work like that.

Imagine how you would feel walking to work with a large bag in the pissing rain and cold, ice and snow and your DH drove past in the car on his way to work.

Would you not expect him to put himself 2 minutes out of his way and drop you off?

popadop · 08/10/2011 19:36

lol......................It is not in case he gets wet lol lol lol that was said to wind up the in laws because they were crap parents.

We have busy lives and if he walks home it is a rush sometimes......

sometimes he walks, sometimes he strolls, sometimes I pick him up.

In the summer sometimes I pick him up and we go straight to the beach. [even when it is not raining ...SHOCK !!!!! HORROR!!!!!!!!]

Honestly what does it matter to you.

popadop · 08/10/2011 19:38

mILICENT...............nO NOT STICK TO ONE CHILD OF COURSE NOT HAVE AS MANY AS YOU LIKE WHAT DO i CARE.

Uppity · 08/10/2011 19:53

It's not because they can't manage.

It's because it's cheaper to drive them, than for them to use public transport.

If you take the Inland Revenue's estimate of 45p a mile as being what it costs you to do a car journey (that represents true costs, not just petrol), it costs me and my friend six pound a week to transport our 2 DC's to and from school. If they went on the bus, it would cost us nearly 30 pounds a week between them.

No brainer.

fluffythevampirestabber · 08/10/2011 20:06

For me, it's also about caring for the members of your family and doing a (for me) small thing that makes their lives easier - why wouldn't you? Confused

popadop · 08/10/2011 20:08

Exactly.......................why would'nt you?

fluffythevampirestabber · 08/10/2011 20:13

And my kids are active and sporty and independent. Which me picking them up has bugger all to do with.

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