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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think pupils at secondary should make their way to school on their own?

226 replies

emkana · 07/10/2011 21:47

be it walking, cycling, or bus - but not driven by their parents anymore. I guess liftsharing with other parents to save money is okay. But parents driving the little darlings every day because they couldn't possibly manage?

OP posts:
Dawndonna · 07/10/2011 22:21

Yes, I probably will be taking them to college/university. They all have Aspergers. Not that I should have to justify my parenting choices.

Maryz · 07/10/2011 22:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
emkana · 07/10/2011 22:21

In Germany most children go to school on their own from early primary school, often taking buses.

And it's not bitching, it's a debate, or supposed to be.

Where did I say they gave to take the bus even if they're being bullied?

OP posts:
Sevenfold · 07/10/2011 22:22

maybe the op also thinks my dd should make her own way on a bus.............

maypole1 · 07/10/2011 22:22

Sevenfold yes same as us the worse thing was they lived near the school but were getting the bus especially to bully dd then getting off a few stops down and walking home

Sevenfold · 07/10/2011 22:22

parents driving the little darlings every day because they couldn't possibly manage?

I quote

talkingnonsense · 07/10/2011 22:22

Well I'd love ds to get the bus in the morning but it doesn't stop if it's already full! He gets the bus home.

ilovesooty · 07/10/2011 22:23

Yes Maryz, I've seen that - he obviously couldn't carry all that by himself. I don't think it's typical of what most teenagers in the UK carry to school though.

Sevenfold · 07/10/2011 22:23

maypole1 Sad

maypole1 · 07/10/2011 22:23

emkana I am sure the teachers in Germany take threats to kill a tad more seriously

doesntfitin · 07/10/2011 22:23

No you don't have to justify anything really

I just think you have to let them go at some point

troisgarcons · 07/10/2011 22:24

Thank feck he isnt learning the piano

Original poster
emkana · 07/10/2011 22:24

I was referring there to parents who say their children can't cope when they've never even tried

Which yours clearly have.

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 07/10/2011 22:24

If DS went to school nearby I would be dropping him off at school on my way to work. Have you seen the price of a bus pass?

Original poster
emkana · 07/10/2011 22:25

No I don't think so, German schools are not really that great at dealing with bullying ime.

OP posts:
TastyMuffins · 07/10/2011 22:25

I'm still in shock that primary school children are driven on a regular basis to and from local schools in a city. So many cars on the road it puts the kids who walk and cycle at much more risk.

Surely congestion and increase in pollution are good reasons to be concerned let alone the kids who turn into adults incapable of getting themselves from one place to the next without someone else giving them guidance. Someone's got to work with the gormless people.

Perhaps if more kids went to and from primary school on their own they would know what to do when they start secondary school and it wouldn't add to the other changes they already face.

ilovesooty · 07/10/2011 22:26

I have a friend whose daughter when 15/16 used to flatly refuse to go to school unless he drove her. At that age he couldn't make her..

Her school was less than a mile away.

Sirzy · 07/10/2011 22:27

I had no option of a school bus. I had a direct walking route which wasn't safe (especially in winter) and took 20 mins, the less direct route was an hour along a busy road. Add to that i had ongoing (still!) knee problems from year 9 I was bloody grateful that my mum was able to take me and pick me up!

Oh and I was still more than capable of making my own way to college 40 mins away on the bus so I dont think it did any long term damage!

jellybeans · 07/10/2011 22:27

YANBU on the whole. Loads of DD's friends get lifts because the parents are 'worried' or the child doesn't want to walk far or won't risk getting wet.

maypole1 · 07/10/2011 22:28

doesntfitin may I ask how keen you would be to get the bus home if someone said they were going to kill you

Or would you want your oh to pick you up from work

JLK2 · 07/10/2011 22:31

I was getting myself to school from the age of about 9. My brother was a couple of years younger than me and I used to be responsible for getting him there as well. We used to walk in the summer or get the bus in the winter.

I am amazed when I see or hear about 6th form age children (young adults really) relying on their parents to ferry them everywhere. It cannot be good for them. We seem to be regressing, 18 year olds today are at about the maturity level of 16 year olds a generation ago. We have had 21-22 year olds starting work at the firm where I work that have literally never done any work in their lives and have no idea about how to act in a work environment. Something has gone very wrong.

Maryz · 07/10/2011 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LaWeasel · 07/10/2011 22:32

When I was at school the people that got driven in usually had either:

a) stupid public transport routes that would have taken hours.
b) a parent working near the school that was driving in anyway.
c) only occasionally did if they had loads of stuff to carry/their public transport didn't turn up.
d) daftly over-protective parents.

I think the d's were probably in the minority.

TimmyTimeRules · 07/10/2011 22:34

My friend used to drive her children to secondary school even though they lived a 15 minute walk away along safe roads. She used to do this so she knew they were actually attending. On weekends these same children used to go all over the place on their own by bus or by train.
Anybody who saw her doing the school run would have thought her children were the most mollycoddled ever but looks can be deceiving!

Sevenfold · 07/10/2011 22:35

maypole1 perhaps all the judgy posters and the op haven't had their child bullied. if they had they would get it

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