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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that the mums on the school run

259 replies

M0naLisa · 23/09/2011 09:08

Who turn up in their PJs are just lazy?

Why would anyone want to take their child to school in their PJs? It takes what all of 5 mins getting dressed??

Just seen a mum with black and white polka dots PJ bottoms on, fluffy ugg style slippers - they were slippers as they had bunny ears on them flapping about!! Hmm

Is it just me who thinks its lazy?

OP posts:
Latsia · 23/09/2011 13:22

Sorry, I would judge. Doesn't set your kids the best example. They're starting a day at school and you can't even be arsed to get yourself dressed in time.

I only know one person who did this and she was clinically depressed.

Original poster
M0naLisa · 23/09/2011 13:32

Wow 9 pages I'm impressed.

OP posts:
LidlVoice · 23/09/2011 13:36

You know what? I think wearing pyjamas and slippers to go out in is a bit like hanging around outside Tesco Metro with a big dog; a badge of honour for the chavs. Which is why MOST of us on here don't get it. I expect those who find it fine probably do it themselves and have little self-respect and probably swear loudly in public too.

Kladdkaka · 23/09/2011 13:43

I've done this many times. Lazy? No. Autistic where executive function is much worse in the mornings? Yes. Miracle of autistic parent getting autistic child to school on time without any help or support, with necessary book bag, pe kit, lunch box, hat, coat, gloves and scarf, shoes on right feet etc? Absobloominlutely.

'Judge not, lest ye be slapped around the chops with a dead herring' Kladdkaka chapter 39 verse 1

HoHoLaughingMonster · 23/09/2011 13:44

Do you know what?

I think the people who find it fine don't necessarily do it themselves (although they might, who knows?), and they have a healthy dose of self respect, and possibly some tolerance and open mindedness too.

And they aren't the sort of people to use the word chav either, because they don't believe in labelled or judging people on their clothes, or their dog, or even their swearing, but look far deeper at the person inside.

tigercametotea · 23/09/2011 13:46

I think its quite funny to see other mums go out in their PJ's on their school runs. That and women going out shopping with their hair still in rollers. But I live in Liverpool and that's a common sight! I just wouldn't do it myself though. I lack the confidence. (!)

Gigondas · 23/09/2011 13:47

Each to their own- can't say I am that fussed even if wouldn't do it myself

TheOriginalFAB · 23/09/2011 13:49

Did you mean to post this on netmums if it was the wrong forum?

capricorn76 · 23/09/2011 13:52

You can't see the person inside until you've spoken to that person so it's human nature to make a 1st judgement based on their appearance. If they look dirty and unkempt I tend not to bother to talk to them. I would also avoid someone who turned up at the gate looking like Pretty Woman before the make-over.

dexter73 · 23/09/2011 13:52

FAB - it was posted in Chat originally but has been moved to AIBU.

Original poster
M0naLisa · 23/09/2011 14:18

no I posted it in chat. might actually post it on nm later see the reaction on there moat of them will say they do it lol

OP posts:
HoHoLaughingMonster · 23/09/2011 14:29

Yes it's human nature to make judgements. But also (most) humans have the ability to think beyond that, to think "yep they look as rough as a dogs arse but that could be for any number of reasons, so hey I'll give them a chance".

How will you EVER know if they're a decent person if you won't even talk to them?

fanjobanjowanjo · 23/09/2011 14:42

If you haven't got time, you need to get up earlier.

It isn't hard to get out of bed and put your clothes on immediately.

If you don't get to wash/brush hair/teeth it isn't the end of the world.

There's no excuse for the pj bit. Have a bit of respect for yourself.

Kladdkaka · 23/09/2011 14:54

If you haven't got time, you need to get up earlier.

I have time, what I don't have is executive function. Getting up earlier will only make that worse.

It isn't hard to get out of bed and put your clothes on immediately.

It is a well documented difficulty for people with conditions that affect their executive function. Why would the state pay millions in providing assistance with this if it wasn't hard?

There's no excuse for the pj bit.

Yes there is, see above.

Have a bit of respect for yourself.

Hmm
squeakytoy · 23/09/2011 14:57

Sorry, but if you can put a dressing gown on, you can pull a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a sweatshirt on. It takes exactly the same length of time, and doesnt look like you just wandered out of a hospital ward...

halcyondays · 23/09/2011 15:10

I am terrible in the morning and would love to be able to go out in my pjs, but I just couldn't bring myself to go out and do the school run in them. How hard is it to pull on some jogging bottoms or jeans? But the funny thing is, it usually isn't laziness, apparently, they have special pjs to go out in, they get washed, do their hair, put make up and big gold hoop earrings on and out their clean pjs on.

BoringSchoolChoiceNickname · 23/09/2011 15:41

I'm with Apocalypse, apart from the very few who do have significant mental health issues it's nowt to do with laziness, it's just a fad, and a bloody silly one.

Pretty sure my DC's school has its fair share of mums with morning sickness, PND, more kids than they can cope with or just big lazy arses, but none of them has ever been seen doing the school run in their PJs because you don't do it round here.

Just as well really, because if I saw a mother at the school gate with a metaphorical sign on her head saying "Ha ha, I'm going back to have a bath and watch Friends reruns in bed while you have to squeeze onto the Northern Line and file FSA returns" I would not be answerable for my actions (I'm not a morning person).

fanjobanjowanjo · 23/09/2011 15:58

*If you haven't got time, you need to get up earlier.

I have time, what I don't have is executive function. Getting up earlier will only make that worse.

It isn't hard to get out of bed and put your clothes on immediately.

It is a well documented difficulty for people with conditions that affect their executive function. Why would the state pay millions in providing assistance with this if it wasn't hard?

There's no excuse for the pj bit.

Yes there is, see above.

Have a bit of respect for yourself.*

Every mother that wears pjs on the school run doesn't do so because they have the same issues you do.

If it affects your executive function so much to get dressed, do you ever get dressed? If you have the time as you say, it isn't a problem? I'm confused by that point.

ScarletLady01 · 23/09/2011 16:01

I don't even own any PJs or slippers...I sleep in the buff.

I'm sure THAT would raise a few eyebrows on the school run if I couldn't be arsed to fling some clothes on! o_0

Kladdkaka · 23/09/2011 16:15

fanjobanjowanjo for me it varies from day to day. Today is a particularly bad day. I'm now almost functioning but didn't reach that point until about 3.00pm. Yesterday I reached that point about 10.00am. When I was younger I was better so was ok at most school drop offs. The best way I can describe it is that it's like when you get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and stumble across the landing in the dark. You're up and you're awake, but there is a part of your brain that isn't working yet.

I admit though that I had no idea there was a weird fashion in public wearing of pjs in the UK at the moment. I used to try and hide it with wellies and a long coat. Which is probably worse as I looked like a flasher.

catgirl1976 · 23/09/2011 16:18

Kladdkaka - please do not take this the wrong way as I am genuinely interested but if you had the executive function to put on wellies and a coat to hide the fact you were wearing pyjamas, how did you not have the executive function to change the pyjamas instead?

I do not know about your condition so I am interested not trying to be offensive

giveitago · 23/09/2011 16:20

It is skanky.
Do they not freeze to death on the walk in, anyway? It can't be comfortable.

Not if you live exactly next door - then it's just convenient. I've done it (but not that other parents can see). I do it because a) life is too short b) there's noone there I'm trying to impress.

usualsuspect · 23/09/2011 16:21

I don't give a flying fuck what other people wear on the school run

Kladdkaka · 23/09/2011 16:35

catgirl1976 I can't really explain it. It's about transitioning from one thing to another. (Any parent of an autistic child will tell you what a nightmare this is.) I have difficulty mentally moving from one thing to the next. Moving from being in 'bed mode' to 'day mode' is difficult. Taking pjs off and putting on clothes is moving from one to the other. Putting wellies and a coat on is still being in 'bed mode' but covering it up. The mental jump hasn't taken place.

The therapy for autistic people with this kind of problem usually involves breaking down what seems to be a simple process into even smaller processes and establishing them as a routine. I have a special app on my phone from the hospital which does this for me. But another problem with transitioning is that I can't jump from one routine to another and then back again. It has to be all or nothing.

I hope that makes some sort of sense.

catgirl1976 · 23/09/2011 16:37

Thank you for the insight - its very interesting. Hope you dont think I am being too nosey