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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think they are lying

181 replies

Fairyloo · 20/09/2011 09:38

Just read article about being a busy working mum (on back of new SJP film) won't in article are saying that they haven't had a uninterruped phonecall for years? And not had full nights sleep for years nor a bath!

Now I'm busy and tired but still manage a bath a full night sleep and an uninterrupted phone call.

Do you? Or is it really that busy

OP posts:
Stoirin · 23/09/2011 08:13

apologies I was drunk MN'ing. I had a reasonable point imo, but was unreasonable in the phrasing and attitude of it.

Zoggsrus · 23/09/2011 08:15

Fgs, why do people feel the need to criticise parenting methods when obviously they are doing the best they can.

Big meanies!
I think I might have to hide this thread now, it's really getting to me

AbbyAbsinthe · 23/09/2011 08:49

Oh ffs. It's a discussion! EVERYONE is doing the best they can. It doesn't mean that anyone's individual choices are worse or better than anyone elses. Just different. I know what I wouldn't be able to put up with, and parent my dc accordingly. Some of you think cc is cruel - do you see the parents that have used cc getting upset at your criticism?

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 09:21

all the time.

mememummy · 23/09/2011 09:32

When i have a bath V. Rarely DD sits on her stool next to me and tells me what she has done at nursery etc i love it. usually i have a shower but sometimes it is a challenge to have a phone call as she want to talk to being a mum/dad etc is what you make it i think and you kiddies are only little once it wont be long and they will have left home and u will be desperate for some1 to shout let me in i want to talk to you! on the bathroom door ;)

Ormirian · 23/09/2011 09:34

Fuck me stoirin, what a vile post, drunk or not.

Why don't some of you perfect parents try a little empathy FFS! Some children don't respond to the very best parenting technques. And (this might be shocking to hear) but some parents aren't perfect. They are human, therefore fallible. And another piece of information that might help with this discussion is that children aren't kitchen appliance, don't have a manual to follow in case of malfunction and you can't switch them off at the wall when you've had enough.

Some children are just very very difficult. Some parents (not being fucking supernanny) aren't perfect. It doesnt make them useless or pathetic and neither does it make them unreasonable for having a moan.

And please can you tell me why you are so (that's a generic 'all' btw Hmm) determined to tell off these pathetic parents - so determined that they caused all their own problems? Sometimes shit happens and there is no cause.

Ormirian · 23/09/2011 09:36

And CC isn't cruel. If it works quickly. If you are one of those fortunate parents for whom it works in a few nights. If you aren't, and the child sobs and sobs for hours and hours for nights on end, then yes IMO, it is cruel. Then it's a battle of wills between and an adult, who should know better, and a child, who has no choice.

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 09:39

Orm, I think it's a form of defensiveness. It's like people who say 'Oh that could never happen to me'.

For some reason they (generic they) can't bear the idea that they might be seen as failing, where they see others as failing. So obviously it's the failing people's fault.

Stoirin · 23/09/2011 09:48

Hardly vile, and whats all this bullshit about "perfect parents"? I was responding to the ridiculous post previous to mine that stated anyone who had an opinion other that "oh you poor thing aint't your life hard" must have a nanny and a detached mansion! Away with the fairies, that one!

Its nothing to do with criticising anyones parenting, or telling anyone what to do. You're having a one-sided argument because no-one said anything like that. The only point here is regarding that particular small subsection of women/mothers that make out that every is just so hard all the time, that they never get a second to themeselves and are slaves to their children. It is martyrdom, plain and simple, and you know it too. You're just choosing to defend yourself against non-existent slandering instead of answering the question at hand.

I have a very difficult child, I know al about a challenge. And some easy ones too. I don't care what you do with your children, really no-one does.

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 09:50

'I was responding to the ridiculous post previous to mine that stated anyone who had an opinion other that "oh you poor thing aint't your life hard" must have a nanny and a detached mansion! Away with the fairies, that one!'

Yes but Stoirin, she wasn't talking to you personally so there was no need for you to take it that way

Stoirin · 23/09/2011 09:53

I didn't. I just responded to the overall ridiculous nature of it.

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 09:56

Bollocks.

Ormirian · 23/09/2011 09:59

"You're just choosing to defend yourself against non-existent slandering instead of answering the question at hand"

No I'm not. I'm not defending myself against anyone. I was talking about the thread in general. No-one has slandered me and I wouldn't say they had. On and btw what is the question at hand?

Stoirin · 23/09/2011 10:01

perhaps you should read the OP if you are confused?

and bollocks to you too MrsBlarney. Hmm

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 10:09

Thankyou Stoirin.

I note you are often deleted and I can see exactly why this happens. So I shan't be taking you very seriously.

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 10:10

By the way,. what makes you think bollocks was directed at you personally?

Ormirian · 23/09/2011 10:22

Oh that one.

I answered that ages ago and l don't think the thread would have been interesting, or very long, if we all just said Yes, Yes, and Yes, or No, No and No, or even No, yes and yes.... or variations on that theme.

Ormirian · 23/09/2011 10:27

And presumably it's OK for people who agree with the OP to join in the fun?

OP: mothers who say theire lives are hard are liars.
Poster-who-agree-with-OP: Yes and not very good at being parents either as it's perfectly easy to deal with even the most awkward of children.
Another-Poster-who-agree-with-OP: They are just martyrs FFS!

But no-one who doesn't.

AbbyAbsinthe · 23/09/2011 10:46

This is ridiculous. Funny how we 'perfect' parents try and consider your point of view, and all that's seen as is criticism Hmm

Nobody has said you're shit parents. Yet that's how you choose to see it. Off you go then.

Ormirian · 23/09/2011 11:01

Thanks.

I'd be interested to see what you thought you were saying though.

TipOfTheSlung · 23/09/2011 11:22

Do people seriiously lock their bathroom doors to have a bath in peace with under 3s around?

I gave up on baths. I have four children 8 and under and cannot relax in a bath knowing that something could be going on/wrong in another room.

AbbyAbsinthe · 23/09/2011 11:30

I haven't said anyone's a shit parent. I haven't said anyone's a martyr, apart from mentioning my sister, who I do think is a martyr.

Throughout the thread, I've been discussing the OP. And along the way, discussing the various points raised by parents that don't parent the same way as I do. Isn't that sort of the point of these threads?

AbbyAbsinthe · 23/09/2011 11:32

Tip

I wouldn't have needed to lock my door, because I would have waited until they were in bed....

TipOfTheSlung · 23/09/2011 11:52

I was kind of asking the person who said lock the door

MrsBlarney · 23/09/2011 13:12

Love to see you finding time for a bath, Abby, with four children all under eight, all in bed and staying there, all at the same time...ha ha ha ha ha

You really do have NO idea, do you?