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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To get the kids to contribute towards their own take-aways?

92 replies

FluffyGreenMould79 · 16/09/2011 11:19

The kids have been nagging for a takeaway for ages now. I did say I'd consider it for this week but a take-away for the 3 of us will cost around £10 (I only get noodles and curry for the chinese for £3!).

AIBU to say they can have a take-away tonight if they contribute towards it with their own pocket money? I don't usually make them pay for their own food obviously but this is a luxury that THEY want.

AIBU?

OP posts:
DooinMeCleanin · 16/09/2011 11:20

YANBU. However my DC would be aghast at the suggestion they buy their own noodles, so it might not be a popular choice.

Original poster
FluffyGreenMould79 · 16/09/2011 11:23

They don't get noodles, they get meals that cost around £5 each! I'm the one that makes do with the cheapo noodles lol

OP posts:
aldiwhore · 16/09/2011 11:26

How old are they?? If teens, they should maybe treat YOU once in a while out of the goodness of their own hearts! Wink If they're pre-schoolers it might be a little unreasonable!

Original poster
FluffyGreenMould79 · 16/09/2011 11:28

11 and 13 lol

I'm thinking of asking them to go halves on whatever they buy. So if they want the monster king kong burger at £5 they give me £2.50 towards it?

OP posts:
Voidka · 16/09/2011 11:30

Are you strapped for cash?

If you are then YANBU, if you can afford the takeaway then I think YABU.

aldiwhore · 16/09/2011 11:31

Fair enough then I say!!

HattiFattner · 16/09/2011 11:31

I think its a good plan. Id also make them pay up front.

Ultimately, they will be eating healthier food at home than from the chinese.

You could, in a moment of generosity in some future time, offer them a treat. But they should see it as such.

My kids have short arms and long pockets when confronted with the need to PAY for something. They grumble, but it does mean they dont expect me to buy a load of old crap.

kat2504 · 16/09/2011 11:31

11 and 13 is a bit young, it's not like they have a source of income at that age really is it? perhaps you are giving them too much pocket money if it is leaving you so strapped for cash?

zukiecat · 16/09/2011 11:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FabbyChic · 16/09/2011 11:34

Don't be so bloody tight, they should have a takeaway once a week, also gives you a night off from cooking too.

I agree with Zukie 100%

Original poster
FluffyGreenMould79 · 16/09/2011 11:35

I do feed my children, we have plenty of good food in the cupboards. If they're CHOOSING to want something else then I don't see what's wrong with them contributing towards it. It's not like they have no choice - as I say there is plenty of good food at home.

OP posts:
notherdaynotherdollar · 16/09/2011 11:35

£10 blimey thats cheap for 3

i pay about £25 for us

tryingtoleave · 16/09/2011 11:37

Either you can afford it or you can't. They shouldn't have to pay for their dinner.

FabbyChic · 16/09/2011 11:37

Well I think you are a tight arse, kids should be treated to a takeaway once a week and the parents should pay for it.

PopcornMouse · 16/09/2011 11:37

YABU - it's a once-in-a-while treat and they're too young to have jobs to pay for such things. (I'm impressed it's only £10 actually, it'd be double that here!)

See it as a treat for good behaviour and enjoy the time sharing something they consider special :o)

PopcornMouse · 16/09/2011 11:38

It's not like they have no choice - as I say there is plenty of good food at home.

That's a bit miserable! There's plenty of muesli in my cupboard, but I don't want to eat it for every meal!

onehellofaride · 16/09/2011 11:38

11 and 13 is very young to have to pay for their own food treat or not! If you can afford it then that makes it even worse and if you can't then maybe you should sit them down and explain that you really cannot afford to buy a takeaway. If you think they are old enough to buy it themselves then they are old enough to learn that money doesn't grow on trees!

Original poster
FluffyGreenMould79 · 16/09/2011 11:40

Ok I'll say we can't have one then as we (I) can't afford it.

Although I can guarantee they'll then say "what if we pay for it ourselves?" as that is the usual bargaining tool!

OP posts:
booyhoo · 16/09/2011 11:40

they should have a takeaway once a week??

what the hell for? who says? and who should be paying for that?

OP if it is them tht wants the ood then yes i would say they pay for it or go halves. if you wanted to treat them then you pay. i'm sure they have pocket money?

my ds is 6 and we have a weekly dvd night with pizza and sweets. i buy the pizza and sweets but ds uses his own (earnt during the week) money to rent a £1 dvd. if he doesn't have enough money any week then we watch something we already have at home of his choosing. there is nothing wrong with children learning that if you want something you have to pay for it.

reelingintheyears · 16/09/2011 11:40

Do they have to pay towards the food shopping too?

With their pocket money?

Tight arse....your responsibility to feed and clothe your children.

I thought you were going to say they were grown up and working.

NinkyNonker · 16/09/2011 11:40

Wow, I'm 30 and my parents still pick up the tab for takeaways, meals etc. We have done but on the rare occasion. It is the sort of thing I could see them saying in jest though when we were younger.

DaisySteiner · 16/09/2011 11:40

Well, I disagree with Fabby Chic that they should have a takeaway once a week (last time I checked it wasn't part of the UN convention on the rights of the child) but I think it's a bit mean not to treat them to something they enjoy occasionally. If you can afford it of course.

IloveJudgeJudy · 16/09/2011 11:41

Fabby, we can't afford a takeaway once a week. I couldn't tell you the last time we had one. If OP's DC want one she could present them with the facts, tell them she can't afford it and if they still want one, why can't they pay half towards it. It's either that or not have one at all. It would be their shout.

kat2504 · 16/09/2011 11:41

I don't agree that all kids should have a takeaway every week. It's nice as an occasional treat but it isn't massively healthy and is more expensive than home cooking. It isn't their right to have a takeaway every week. However, if they have more money than you then there is something amiss in your family finances!

startail · 16/09/2011 11:41

You are being a bit tight, or you really can't afford it. If you can't afford it the answers no.
If the children are just nagging and being annoying how about chores to earn money for the takeaway fund.