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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To make him walk to school

137 replies

Shinyshoes1 · 06/09/2011 08:51

I'm pissed off already and it's not even 9am.

I said to my ds1 on Friday who is 14 years of age he is to find his Oyster card ready for back to school today. He hasnt found it and has said 'just stop my pocket money for 2 weeks and get another one' This is his bloody answer for everything and he must have had 8 last year if not more.

I know it's a hated phrase on here but I will use it anyway. These kids have a sense of entitlement that is astounding. I am trying to rectify this .

He rolls his eyes at me and has just screamed at me 'I've looked for it' He hasn't looked for it he's just lifted up a few items.

Sometimes I just wanna smack that attitude right from him.

I'm fucking furious that the 1st day back, nothing has changed and we are doing the ole lost Oyster routine.

He is just not bothered and knows full well I will replace it. He dont even care. So, AIBU to make him walk to and from school until it's found.

Its about 1 .5 miles and would take him around 20-25 minutes

OP posts:

G1nger · 06/09/2011 09:16

Between my partner and I, we own about 8 oyster cards. Maybe more. Sneaky little things - they're like nail scissors: they like to hide! They turn up eventually, but the amount of times we'd have had to walk if we hadn't bought other ones...!

I don't really see the problem - the money's coming out of his fortnightly pocket money. Seems fair to me.

Sofabitch · 06/09/2011 09:17

My 9 and 10 year old walk a mile and half to school everyday.

rubyrubyruby · 06/09/2011 09:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

duchesse · 06/09/2011 09:17

shiny, start as you mean to go on this academic year and tell him he's on his own with this. He has a bus pass- if he chooses not to know where it is, that's his problem. Tell him you are busy if he calls asking for a lift later.

Sofabitch · 06/09/2011 09:18

Perhaps he should save up his pocket money for the next 2 weeks and buy himself an oyster card when he has enough? Might make him A little more carful?

MrsRobertDuvall · 06/09/2011 09:18

Yes, let him walk home in the rain.
The forecast is grim all week so he may see the error of his ways before long.
ds lost his once in yr 7...we replaced it, but told him if he lost it again he would be responsible for replacing it. No mum making the relevant calls, or paying.
He has never lost it.

Do not give in tonight .

hebejebe · 06/09/2011 09:18

My DD (8) and DS (10) walk 1 mile to school, rain or shine. Takes 20 minutes, they have cagoules for the rain.

Make him walk. The exercise is also very good for him!

flack · 06/09/2011 09:19

Mine will have to walk that daily, too.

Groovee · 06/09/2011 09:19

I'd make him walk and it may teach him a lesson and make him look for it

oldenoughtowearpurple · 06/09/2011 09:19

I would love to think that I would have made mine walk, but I have a sneaking suspicion i would have just ranted and given in.

I just didn't have the balls to put up with the unpleasantness that making them walk would have resulted in. And now i am stuck with a Princess and a Sloth.

mousymouse · 06/09/2011 09:19

get him a raincoat. he won't melt but (maybe) a little rain will make him look harder for his card.
and don't pick him up when he calls...

festi · 06/09/2011 09:19

yes even if its raining, i just got home from walking my 5 yr old that distance in the rain and will also have to do the same later if its rainning.

HidingInTheUndergrowth · 06/09/2011 09:19

"What if it's raining, I know he's not made of sugarpaper and won't melt but do I make him walk home in the rain??"

Make sure he has a decent waterproof coat and he will be fine.

kickingking · 06/09/2011 09:20

I'd make him walk. I used to walk over a mile to school, and back, when I when younger than him.

whackamole · 06/09/2011 09:21

I used to walk to and from school. Almost as far. There was simply no transport.

Make him walk, and make him walk back too, regardless of the weather. He won't melt.

flack · 06/09/2011 09:21

Just get a light waterproof, something he can squash up bottom of a bag & it won't gut you if it goes missing (I get DC's from charity shops if possible).
DS is 11yo & has been walking by himself in all weathers to catch the minibus (3/4 mile away) for a year now.

BendyBob · 06/09/2011 09:22

Yanbu at all. Take a deep breath and don't let it become your problem; just shrug and look unconcerened/vague about it.

I'd have been suggesting walking in after lost Oyster card #1 though and 1.5 miles isn't far.

Ephiny · 06/09/2011 09:24

I think it's a perfectly reasonable walk for a teenager, it was totally normal when I was that age anyway, and yes even in the rain. Lots of kids did it, so you got to walk with your friends and chat, it was a nice social thing as well as good exercise! Not that we thought of it as 'exercise', it was just normal.

StrandedBear · 06/09/2011 09:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

olderyetwider · 06/09/2011 09:25

Loving the mental picture of a 14 year old face when presented with a cagoule

Tyrionlovingyourwork · 06/09/2011 09:25

My 4 yo old walks to 2 miles to school whatever the weather.

BendyBob makes a sensible suggestion.

BeaWheesht · 06/09/2011 09:25

1.5 miles? Ds will be walking that next year - he is 4 and in p1. Yabu.

Smellslikecatpee · 06/09/2011 09:26

I guess I?m really mean, because I?d stop his pocket money for the attitude alone, for at least a month. And then he can walk, won?t melt will he?
But you need to be firm, no pick ups, no changing your mind, if you?re going to do it stick to it.
1.5 miles is nothing, and seeing his mate float by in the bus might wake him up a bit

Bettymum · 06/09/2011 09:28

My 3.5 year old DD walks a mile to nursery, and a mile home again. If it rains she wears a raincoat and a hat.
I walked about a mile and a half to school at your DS's age, rain or shine. It's really really not a big deal and you get to chat to your mates.
Good luck :).

Grumpla · 06/09/2011 09:31

If it's raining, he will get wet. Nothing will drop off!

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