to think attitudes to disabilities in a themepark should be better...

[LunarRose]

We have exit passes for DS with ASD.

AIBU that "I'm going to kick their head in" cos they're "queue jumping", was neither clever nor original (especially after the third time my DP heard it during the day)

AIBU that pushing DS out the way (in the chest with some force) because he failed to respond instantly to your demand he "get out of your way" (whist waiting at the disabled exit) was just plain unpleasant (I was bending down to move him at the time)

So many more similar incidents through the day.

I normal circumstances I wouldn't want to wish my son's disability on anyone, nor the days over backache that a themepark trip entitled before we knew about exit passes (from carrying DS through Queuelines kicking and screaming) however....

We shall retreat to Chessington where we have always found people lovely!!!

"Did I need to read people's accounts on here to understand why fasttrack passes are so important for people with autism? No, I did not, I got that. Did I find reading the accounts helpful to increasing my awareness? Yes, I did."

this is the relevant bit, I think, Dandy. you had the basic compassion and awareness to know that exit passes are a necessity. expalining more abut the minutiae of daily life I never mind. I try to answer questions as best I can. but there is no answer to comments which boil down to "if your child cannot cope in public then keep them at home" or "it's not fair" (without any awareness of what fair actully is, in terms of accessing public places)

I was not having a go at anyone who finds posts like Marne's interesting, or enlightening. as I said before - until you have to live it (or read a blow by blow account which, for a fleeting moment gives you a window into our world) there is no way you could know.

but as you yourself pointed out - you would not be someone tutting and muttering about "people like that shoudl not be here" or similar. and that makes a world of difference

exact;y 2 shoes why i no longer can be bothered to post on parking and toilet threads any more and think well why should I if people can not see the need why should I explain what it is like .

And for everyone like yoursel Dandy who is willing to learn on a lot of threads theres a lot of same people cropping up who post about the so called perks we or our children get who are not willing to learn or even to consider what it is like

Funny we get told that being disabled or having children that are that we have a sense of entitlement but infact i do think it is the other way round .Some people can not bear to see what they view as perks that we get and they want them to . Not realsing those so called perks are infact a essential thing to let us function in society

ty Dandy and no i do understand what you was trying to say and liek i said genuine posters and people when out I really do not mind explaining .

Though if it is a bad day, maybe not so much then but Im human we all have days when were tired and bit more grumpy and as am more likly just to give of the do not ask vibes

I find thinking about using a large frying pan or blunt club on certain elemnts of mn heads help with that one Dandy

Riveninabingle oh don't get me started on disabled toilet threads. they have the choice of 10 toilets, but have to use the one disabled toilet(not talking the once with baby changing in them( because they chose to get A massive pram, like we chose to have a disabled child or a disability.

The idea that people with disabilities have a sense of entitlement has been a government media campaign for the last couple of years and I for one have seen a greater hostility and a change of perception of what we 'get'.

I believe this it to ripen the country for cuts and yet more cuts to the vulnerable in society who can't fight back.

Soon very few disabled children will be in theme parks as even with the exist passes, life is just too damn difficult to get there or be able to afford to.

yet look at the sense of entitlement NT folk have, now that would be an interesting thread, turn the tables on them

I feel that will be one short que

, and at Spiderpig's attitude.
Shall I keep DS indoors today?

Well said Riv

I was considering taking Nemo swimming today, for the second time in his life, but I can't because I have no-one to help me with him.

I'm disabled myself, he has SN/LN.

We talked about going to Chessington the other day but again, it needs to be me and DH at the very least.

How many people out there give that a second thought? Most of them get in their cars, arrive, have a great day. Well, that is until a disabled child and their carer arrive.

Then it's a whole other ball game. Sighing, staring, moaning, pointing, speaking out of turn and do you know what? The adults are worse than the children IME.

How lucky they are though, to just get up and leave the house.

No plans, no medical supplies, wheelchairs, tubes, feeds etc. They just get up and go.

And at the end of their day out, they go back to their 'normal' perfect but ignorant lives.

Well you can keep it quite frankly. I can't be arsed with the likes of them.

don't forget the bodyguard, I try to take ds with me, as if someone starts, they see him and back off.

Ah, yes. I've yet to get us one of those. Could you lend me DS once in a while?

We were goven Merlin passes but decided not to use the Sn apsses, we survived by taking care ds1 and ds3 had lots of time out but now ds4 has regressed I don't think we coud cope; we tried the Ss Great britian last week, one whiff of the sea smell in the fish room and we had to get outta there.

They all loonk NT. Well OK I am deluding myself maybe about ds3 but ds1 certsainly does until he loses it, and ds4 well if you catch him when he's not screaming. if you do send me a postcard be nice to know it happens

It's tiring to have Sn kids, someone making a rude comment or being nasty is easily shrugged off when you are fine but not otehrwise. We find such stuff just shrinks our lives not having teh sort of backs water runs off when applies to ducks. It's great whenc arers can be feisty and shouty but we're not all.

Riven that's already teh case isn;t it? I eamn we all have bridges and or carving knives....

Sense of entitlement be damned! DS1 at 11 finally starts an appropriate school tomorrow. DS3 was quicker, but even then the crap we had to negotiate-! DS4 isn;t getting a palce at an assessment nursery but a MS one, why? Becuase some Ed Psych who ahs never met him has a rule that ASD kids should all be in MS.

Trouble is ds4 is ttaking after ds1, I'm not sure if I can cope with two ds1's: pretty scary idea right now!

We don;t have a blue badge and as someone with quite an absolute set of right or wrongs that emans we never use disabled facilltiies unless it's toilets with ds3 (he licks the inside of toilets, find it best to acompany him). When Riv kindly offered us the use fo her parking space years back I could not do it; when I ahd SPD I would climb uni steps in tears rather than use the disability lift until the MN SN perople told me to stop being stupid.

I have to ask for help financially but I hate it, I even pay NI when I am exempt (dormant business I could close)- how silly is that? But it stops the gult at not working (DH does work mind).

Sense of entitlement my srase: guilt complex more like!

Went to Pleasure Wood hills recently in Lowestoft. No policy on disabled entrance (small discount but that was all), was told to ask each individual ride operator for access without queueing and it would be up to their discretion!!!! Most had no idea and some refused.
At one ride where we had a nice operator, as we got on some woman shouted out 'Oi Oi Oi, there is a queue you know' at the top of her voice. i walked back and said by all means if you wish your children to take my childrens disability I will happily queue. She shut up then but it spoilt things and you feel like you're taking the piss the way people look at you.
God if only it was that easy!
And half the time you have to fight through the crowd to get to the bloody exit anyway!

The individual model of disability:
"In what way does your illness/disability stop you enjoying theme parks?"

Social model of disability:
"In what ways did the theme park fail you in your attempt to enjoy a normal day out, and how can it improve its attitude and the attitudes of those non disabled customers who attend?"

Personally having 2 SLD kids I know which model i prefer!

If we want a nice day out we usually end up at Bristol Zoo; they will take your evidences and then work out whcih is the cheapest option for your family as a whole, NT and Sn and carer prices alike. It's so appreciated.

OTOH someone I know was recently made to pay extra as her wheelchair took up a premium space at an attraction WTF?

We base which discounts we go for by how much each child will benefit: sow e only used one DLA reduction at he SS Great britain as ds1 could understand and learn and was interested but at a theme park would use both as despite being 11 he won't even touch most kid's rides and neither will ds3. we go really for ds2 and DH (ane me but someone has to babysit and it's usually me).

I went to PH last with ds2. We were lucky in that that the queues werent very long. There is no SN system at G Yarmouth Pleasure Beach either.

DD2 works at Chessington and had had lots of people complaining to her when she let's those with disability passes on to the ride before them.

That's the thing isn't it mumeeee? It's so unfair of Theme Parks and other places letting disabled children/adults pass through before them. I imagine your DD has a rough time dealing with nasty comments.

So, here's a thing. How about if they were left in the queue, just like everyone else. No passes, no queue jumpers. What if that child/adult started to feel anxious, trapped, enclosed but had maybe waited two years to be able to go to a Theme Park for one reason or another.

What if that person then had a meltdown, in the middle of an hour long queue. Would these people who say it's not fair want to be next to them? Would they help? Would they care?

Would they bloody buffalo.

They'd want that person far, far away from them so that they can get on with their day out.

Or maybe disabled people should all stay at home and stop making everyone else's life a misery? Yes, there you go. Problem solved.