to think attitudes to disabilities in a themepark should be better...

[LunarRose]

We have exit passes for DS with ASD.

AIBU that "I'm going to kick their head in" cos they're "queue jumping", was neither clever nor original (especially after the third time my DP heard it during the day)

AIBU that pushing DS out the way (in the chest with some force) because he failed to respond instantly to your demand he "get out of your way" (whist waiting at the disabled exit) was just plain unpleasant (I was bending down to move him at the time)

So many more similar incidents through the day.

I normal circumstances I wouldn't want to wish my son's disability on anyone, nor the days over backache that a themepark trip entitled before we knew about exit passes (from carrying DS through Queuelines kicking and screaming) however....

We shall retreat to Chessington where we have always found people lovely!!!

Again I as lucky enough to attend a school in the 70s that promoted mainstream education for severely disabled children; my classmate in Infants had quad CP and in Senior school I ahd friends who were hearing impaired and another with acquired brain injury.

I was raised to be tolerant but I learned more than that- certainly when I went on to have Sn chidlren myself I am sure my background meant I was less scared than DH who has had little contact with the SN world throughout his life.

Many kids with ASD go to Sn Comp at 11 as LEAs are less likely to provide a TA 1-1 at that stage (DS1 started his ASD Base today in fact), there seems to be one natral fall out after year 2 and another at 11; things such as being absed in many rooms etc nd with several teahcers is hard for somene with an ASD. but I am sure that he will give, and has given, as much to the other children, as he has gained from MS eduation. The school sonds fab as well- ds3 started in MS and they confiscated his PECS book (his symbol based commnication system) as it got in their way . He can talk now thankfully, though not necessarily amke himself understood always.

Shocking, isn't it. Some people really don't have a clue about the abuse we have to endure. I couldn't stop crying for weeks afterwards because I felt so traumatised and humiliated. I'm back on holiday in October, first time since it happened 2 years ago and I must admit feeling rather apprehensive about the visits we have planned now. (Even though most places bend over backwards to help.)

Perhaps we need a national star rating system of how accommodating places are. Hampton Court Palace were amazingly helpful, as were Kew Gardens. Cheddar Gorge Tours were really embarassed that they hadn't thought about how much disabled people and their carers should be accommodated (the tour goes one way only so people can walk all the way back and enjoy the views), so gave us all free tickets, allowed us to travel back on the bus and treated us all to tea and scones in the cafe.

God thats awful, I suspect people that obnoxious are probably just as disrespectful to the non- disabled

That's great to hear wrt to Cheddar as we go tehre often (the town not the caves, ds4 a little toom young still and ds3 scared of teh dark!)

I ahve no interweb skills at all but I reckon a rate-my-destination site, especially an inclusive one that covered LD / ASD and PD disabilities, would be excellent, bit like tripadvisor where we could all elave feedback?

I guess what struck me about SiL's job was the sense that all these resources were being made available, even thrown about, so that the young woman could have not just an ok life, but a really good one. The feeling that she wasn't grudgingly given half-hearted help after a battle, but that the care system - and thus society at large - wanted her to have the best possible of everything.

It kind of ties in to what Pagwatch was saying, that people so often seem to want disabled people to "be pushed down the social/economic ladder". This was so totally the opposite that it took me a while to digest just how different and fabulous it was.

[Disclaimer: not everything about Sweden is great by any means.]

if your child has SN why take them into a stressful envronment like a theme park?

Maybe because we like our kids to at least try new things Porca. For example, normally a theme park wouldn't be on our list of "things to do which don't cause insanity and a 2nd mortgage" but recently on holiday we were able to take our 2 boys (both SLD) and my 2 nephews and it worked really well as the nephews encouraged my 2 to go on rides. Normally we wouldn't have bothered as they only go on teacups and carousels so seems a bit pointless paying extortionate money for that.
But now my boys have had a new experience and boosted their own confidence and self esteem knowing that the CAN do these things and enjoy them too.
Doesn't mean I'll be rushing back to another theme park anytime soon but at least they've achieved this, some may think, small milestone- to them it's a massive achievement and to be applauded.

[Disclaimer: not everything about Sweden is great by any means.]

Don't get me started on that one. I could tell you stuff that'd make your ears bleed.

Kladdkaka, please don't, we're moving back in a few months.

Also at your experience!

Are you Swedish? Where are you from? We're in the Västra Gotaland region. You can spot my house from outer space, it's the one with the newly painted Barbie pink door.

I'm going to (see if I can figure out how to) PM you!

rate-my-destination site, especially an inclusive one that covered LD / ASD and PD disabilities, would be excellent,

something like that would be excellent Peachy as so far all the sites about holidays and trips etc are focused simply on wheelchair users. Of course I'm not underestimating the importance of this but it would also be nice if there were sites with holiday destinations/trips which included learning disabled and what they can offer (e.g. quieter places to eat/visit/exit passes and so on)
At present I get all excited and eager to click on links which say disabled facilites only to find it is only talking about ramps/handrails etc...

Clearly their cannot be a very great difference between types of customers at Chessington and customers at Legoland. The difference between behaviour of the two groups is down to the environment of the parks.

Legoland lets in far too many people for the facilities it has available and this leads to crowds of people being much more likely to act badly. It also doesn't seem to plan out sensibly how people with passes will easily access rides without having to make their way through groups of other people.

I would not recommend Legoland to anyone. I would recommend Blackpool on the basis that it never has very long queues, everything is close together and there is a huge variety of rides. This improves people's tempers greatly. On the other hand, if you are in a wheelchair it does have a lot of steps, and although each area area is accessible by ramps, the ramps often take a different route so you need to make sure you have a park map.

Someone did have that idea, but it's not been very well developed:
www.asdfriendly.org/

We ahd a wonderful time at Legoland with our Merlin apsses; we did go early season though, early June on a Sunday rather than holidays.

Ourvye woudln;t it be better though if it was ALL sn? I mean it's not as if ASD is always a stand alone- my mate has ASD, VI, GDD..... she needs to know about the ASD stuff and a whole lot more too.

Couldn't MN add this to their reviews section I wonder? Could WE add this to reviews in partnership with them?

They do have the reviews for these palces yes.

Should I message MNHQ and suggest it?

Yes you could do that Peachy, it'd be a start wouldn't it.

good idea peachy. it would be useful
I didn't know there was a lift at blenhem palace until I got there

We went to Legoland this August with ASD DS1, peak season and packed as hell, and we had an amazing day.

The only bum note was the girl operating the pirate ship ride who kept shouting to out to our party and others, 'How many people and how many handicapped'? I was stunned that someone would ever use that word and in that way

Couldn't MN add this to their reviews section I wonder? Could WE add this to reviews in partnership with them?

I had the same though, Peachy ;) (Though we don't do theme parks - the amount of enjoyment my two would get out of one would be disproportionate to the cost of getting in. They're the sort of kids who like a big field or beach to run free on!)

Great idea Peachy, after all, I'm sure it would be a positive thing to see 'recommended by MN(SN?) mums' on review pages of Theme Parks, Attractions etc.

It should be rolled out to more places IMO. So anywhere where there will be long queues, crowded areas, Zoos etc, should participate in a wrist band scheme or the like which means that those who are mentally or physically unable to queue, simply don't have to.

And as Peachy says, the park/attraction entrance and website should state VERY CLEARLY (for the ignorant) that they operate such a system. That way, people can choose whether or not to go there.

As long as the cost to both parties was minimal, then it wouldn't be that hard to set up would it?

They are going to discuss it.

I think you would have to be a complete prick to begrudge a kid with a disability a shorter line at a theme park. I mean really.

Mouseface the word ignorant is harsh because we are all ignorant of what we don't know, and to many people the queue problem is something they have never encountered and cannot guess at. Once they know, of course, to object to exit-passes is more than ignorant, but hell, we've been over that ground enough.

Andrewofgg, i agree there is a difference between not knowing and being ignorant. Before my ds was born i didnt know the first thing about SN's because i didnt need to know, i had to quickly become an 'expert' on my ds and his disability (thanks to mn sn section)

I can tolerate people who really just dont know and are willing to try to understand, i used to be one! Its the people who even when armed with all the information, who just dont want to understand, i have encountered quite a few of these too.

Im glad some people who are not parents of SN or who no experience of SN's have posted on this thread, it does help to know there is still a balance