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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think attitudes to disabilities in a themepark should be better...

568 replies

LunarRose · 03/09/2011 12:16

We have exit passes for DS with ASD.

AIBU that "I'm going to kick their head in" cos they're "queue jumping", was neither clever nor original (especially after the third time my DP heard it during the day)

AIBU that pushing DS out the way (in the chest with some force) because he failed to respond instantly to your demand he "get out of your way" (whist waiting at the disabled exit) was just plain unpleasant Angry (I was bending down to move him at the time)

So many more similar incidents through the day.

I normal circumstances I wouldn't want to wish my son's disability on anyone, nor the days over backache that a themepark trip entitled before we knew about exit passes (from carrying DS through Queuelines kicking and screaming) however....

We shall retreat to Chessington where we have always found people lovely!!!

OP posts:
spiderpig8 · 03/09/2011 15:45

I don't think able bodied people should have disabled passes.Sorry.People in wheelchairs which may pose a danger in a general queue-yes , others -NO

Glitterknickaz · 03/09/2011 15:50

That's a shame, I found Legoland good last time I was there, but I have really noticed Merlin altering the criteria to make it harder and harder to get the passes.

As others have said without passes we simply cannot go.

Paultons Park was dreadful, they completely ignored us despite us making it very clear that we were present at the exit with the relevant documentation, Chessington did the same PLUS their disabled parking spaces are on a hill (cue wheelchairs disappearing off on their own whilst drivers were trying to transfer - I had to help out the people in the next car which I don't mind but what if I hadn't been there?)

It's really shit how accessibility policies are often written by someone who has never been anywhere with anyone who has a disability or with a wheelchair, and it shows when that has been the case.

Glitterknickaz · 03/09/2011 15:51

spiderpig, so those who are actually physically unable to queue due to a structural brain malformation - ie Autistic Spectrum Disorder, should not be allowed to attend theme parks?

Glitterknickaz · 03/09/2011 15:52

and actually spiderpig illustrates PERFECTLY the ignorance we face on a daily basis applauds

nailak · 03/09/2011 15:59

going to a theme park is not a right imo, there are many other reasons why people cant go to theme parks, money, travel, not able to have someone to hold younger child while go with older on the ride etc etc, i dont see why people feel like it is there right.

my kids have never been to a theme park, i would love the chance to go and do what it seems normal families do in the summer holiday, like go to seaside, soft play, theme parks, camping weekends, but i cant. due to my family circumsttances.

what makes a disbabled person more worthy?

nailak · 03/09/2011 16:00

their right

ChippingIn · 03/09/2011 16:03

Glitterknickaz - try not to pay too much attention to people who don't have any fucking common sense knowledge of SN/disability, some of them are alarmingly unaware of the difficulties faced and made 100 times worse by such people

Lunar - it sounds like you had a terrible time. Do you feel your DS gets enough out of it for you to go through all that - and him too. Frankly, those places are hell on earth when you go on your own - let alone with kids and those with SN. It's a shame too as with a little more thought and a lot more staff training it needn't be that way. As for other visitors - some people are fuckwits best ignored, but it's hard I know :(

ChippingIn · 03/09/2011 16:07

Nailik - are you actually serious?

No one said that disabled children have a right to go to a theme park. They are under the same restrictions you and your family are - distance & budget. They don't get a free pass you know.

Once they are in, all they want is the opportunity to do what is available in the park the same as the non disabled children - this requires a bit of assistance from staff and some understanding from customers - which part of that do you think makes them 'entitled'

FFS

worraliberty · 03/09/2011 16:09

nailak you've missed the point totally

If disabled people can afford to go to a theme park and manage to get to a theme park because their circumstances do allow that...then why shouldn't the theme park accommodate them? Confused

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:16

God there are some ignorant posters out there.

My DD could not wait in a queue. She is almost 5, quite able bodied but has no concept of the idea of waiting due to autism and severe learning difficulties.

Therefore to be able to go to a park like another almost 5 year old, she would need a pass. To be on a level footing, not to have an advantage.

As for the poster who said wheelchairs should only get them to avoid causing a nuisance in the hallowed able-bodied queue - words fail me.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:18

Am starting to wonder if 90% of the population is rude selfish and ignorant, from the posts I keep seeing on here and the incidents I am reading about (and experiencing daily)

Andrewofgg · 03/09/2011 16:20

FanJo you are right but it is utterly unrealistic to expect children who have no personal experience in the field and who are themselves being taught to respect queues as children should be to understand why another child is being allowed to "jump the queue" - as they will see it - and children will speak out, often very loud and clear, when they perceive unfair treatment. That's life.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:21

Got grumbled at today by a man because I dared to stand in front of him at top of stairs and block his way for a full 2 seconds whilst I waited for a chance for my DD to hold on to the railing to go down (she struggles with stairs).

Seriously, why are people so grudging and just plain miserable?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:21

Andrewofgg- I am talking about the parents commenting, not the children.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:22

Seriously, posters on here who say that disabled kids don't deserve a slightly easier trip to a theme park, when their whole lives are generally considerably harder, should be ashamed of themselves. End of.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:24

nailak - do you grudge terminally ill children their funded trips to Disneyland etc as "not all can afford it"? Where do you draw the line with your grudging?

ProfessionallyOffendedGoblin · 03/09/2011 16:25

Which is why the adult with them should be able to explain what a fast track pass is and why a child might need one.
But that requires an adult with some level of comprehension.
People were also quite at liberty to queue with my failing, screaming Aspie in meltdown who was clearing a space so that he can breathe if they chose to. They did seem to mind their poppets being frightened though.
Oddly enough, that was seen as unsatisfactory as well.

worraliberty · 03/09/2011 16:25

I agree Fanjo but to be fair there are normally rude, ignorant and arrogant people in all walks of life.

Even on threads like this you'll find rudeness and arrogance on both sides of the 'argument'.

It's easier said than done, but try not to let it get you down.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:27

worraliberty - there are a lot of rude and ignorant and arrogant people in life, and parents of kids with SN encounter them DAILY for some reason, we are the ones who should be all grumpy and vile tempered to the general public if anyone, due to exhaustion and stress, but I don't going around making remarks at all and sundry constantly like some do.

worraliberty · 03/09/2011 16:28

That's my point Fanjo there are some very rude people here with or without kids with SN.

Both arrogant and ignorant at times.

Glitterknickaz · 03/09/2011 16:28

Oh I do apologise. Was forgetting my children should be hidden away and we should all live in isolation for daring to breed defective specimens. Of course we don't have a right to enjoyment and a day out.

Disabled people - know your place.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:28

ie man in museum, I had just spent 3 hours in a busy museum with a child with severe autism - stressful - yet still I managed not to bark and grump at people in my way unlike the man who had just sauntered around looking at the exhibits casually, wonder why this is.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/09/2011 16:29

worra- I agree with you, there are a lot of them on here these days sadly.

ProfessionallyOffendedGoblin · 03/09/2011 16:29

'I don't think able bodied people should have disabled passes.Sorry.People in wheelchairs which may pose a danger in a general queue-yes , others -NO'

So you should get a disabled pass if you inconvenience the Mundanes?
Not simply if you have a disability?

5inthebed · 03/09/2011 16:29

Op, your poor son, I hope he was ok after the shoving.

We went to Lightwater Valley a few weeks ago, we paid for it btw. DS2 got a fast pass, as did DS1 and I as we would be the ones accompanying him on the rides. It was a godsend, as he flips out if he has to wait for longer than a few minutes. it is the first time we have enjoyed going to a theme park.

Nice ignorant comment spiderpig. Just because a person with SN can walk, does not make them any less disabled as a person in a wheelchair.

We are going to Disneyland Paris in November, and would be interested to hear about the fast pass there. How many people get it with the person with SN? Ive heard different things, like the whole group, or just the person and one carer. ANyone set me straight on this?