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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to find it funny that what goes round comes round?

61 replies

SuzanneJS · 01/09/2011 00:06

I found out tonight that a girl who bullied me for two years, over a boy, some 24yrs ago calls her dog the love of her life on her Facebook status.
I'm aware of low self esteem etc, but my self esteem was at it's lowest back then.

OP posts:
WoofToYouTooLady · 01/09/2011 00:09

that's nice, dear

DuelingFanjo · 01/09/2011 00:11

yabu

worraliberty · 01/09/2011 00:12

I don't see the connection really? It's just a status update about her dog?

Have you sought help for how you're still feeling 24yrs on?

Is she on your FB list or can you just see her wall because it's open?

Original poster
SuzanneJS · 01/09/2011 00:13

Why am I being unreasonable to laugh at her state of affairs? I thought her dog was her partner till I read on a bit further.

OP posts:
Vallhala · 01/09/2011 00:13

I adore my dogs and I don't think anyone could accuse me of having no self esteem so I'm not sure that you've scored a hit tbh.

Although bullying is bloody awful - my DD has just left a school which caters purely for the rehabilitation of severely bullied children so believe me I don't underestimate it - it's something which needs to be dealt with at the time, albeit far more effectively than it is at present, and to be put behind the victims in later life.

I'm not sure that gloating about anything, is particularly healthy or beneficial to the victim. Far better to live well yourself and be happy with your lot, that's the revenge.

PerryCombover · 01/09/2011 00:13

I don't understand.

Did you say your dog was the love of your life and did she get on a public forum and sneer about it?

Otherwise where is the cycle?

PotatoesOfTheCarribean · 01/09/2011 00:14

no comprende,

sorry

Original poster
SuzanneJS · 01/09/2011 00:15

Her Facebook wall is open, I just find it amusing that after the stick she gave me she's now on here own and as for therapy...isn't laughter the best cure?

OP posts:
Pandemoniaa · 01/09/2011 00:15

I take most of what is posted on Facebook with a pinch of salt. Far too much of it consists of streams of unreliable consciousness or trouble making. So I'm sorry, but I'd not be assuming anything about this girl.

worraliberty · 01/09/2011 00:15

I think the OP is saying that the woman has no-one in her life except her dog...therefore what goes around comes around?

Unless I'm reading it wrong.

PotatoesOfTheCarribean · 01/09/2011 00:16

You sounds like a twato

PerryCombover · 01/09/2011 00:17

My brother's facebook page says he is interested in men and lives in Abbotabad

If she is still affecting you please speak to a therapist. Bullying is grim and awful and I'm sorry you went through it

WoofToYouTooLady · 01/09/2011 00:17

twato, love it

worraliberty · 01/09/2011 00:17

Yes laughter can be an amazing cure

But to be honest, you looking up her facebook account after 24yrs would kind of indicate that you're still hurting and haven't been 'cured' at all IYSWIM?

There's every possibility that while you've taken all the anger/upset through your life...she may not even remember you at all.

Therefore, it's best to simply move on.

PattySimcox · 01/09/2011 00:18

worra thats how I read it too.

OP I to my shame would feel slightly smug if I were you, however this is mumsnet and such feelings are not allowed Wink

Original poster
SuzanneJS · 01/09/2011 00:18

Vallhala
I meant my laughter is at her status update and how far she's come, she used to bark at me when she saw me for dome absurd reason. I don't think her self esteem is low because she loves her dog

OP posts:
Vallhala · 01/09/2011 00:18

That's how I read it, worra... and nowt wrong with loving your dog afaiac!

amIbeingdaft · 01/09/2011 00:18

OP, I get you. She was a total bitch, and now she's paying for it because she's all on her own. This happens to wankers, people don't want to be around them. Karma is a simple thing.

I do agree though, gloating isn't nice, and it's worrying if this still bothers you. However, if you're just having a five minute gloat to yourself and tomorrow you're going to block her page and get on with your life, then good on you. The best revenge is living well, of course.

worraliberty · 01/09/2011 00:19

Well I don't mean 'simply' move on because obviously it's easier said than done if she affected your life in this way.

I just mean try to move on now for your own sake.

Original poster
SuzanneJS · 01/09/2011 00:20

Worraliberty, she is a friend of a friend on Facebook, otherwise looking her up was never an idea I had till I saw she commented on a status I'd also liked

OP posts:
LindsayWagner · 01/09/2011 00:20

Jeez think it's quite clear what the OP is saying, in a fairly lighthearted way; YANBU, OP - you can take quiet satisfaction from that IMO (while moving on obv ;))

There's something doggy in the MN wind tonight.

Pang · 01/09/2011 00:21

OP this just show you aren't over it. If you were you wouldn't care what she was doing with her life. It's terrible that you were bullied but now it you are older and stronger, so move on.

GreatNorksOfFire · 01/09/2011 00:21

Suzanne, I would just be very careful about life not turning round and biting you on the arse. It has a funny habit of doing that.

This really isn't meant in a bitchy way, but really I would ditch cyber stalking this woman after 24 years and move on. If you can't move on by yourself, then get some counselling to help you. Be bullied is horrid. And it can be quite difficult to move on from it, but for the sake of your own self, it's best if you can do this.

YABU.

Original poster
SuzanneJS · 01/09/2011 00:21

Pattysimcox shall swiftly remove my smugness to more compassionate site ... Lol

OP posts:
Vallhala · 01/09/2011 00:23

Well that's how your comment about low self esteem read to me, Suzanne, or else why mention it out of context?

It seems to me that you were saying that because she "only" (and ^apparently, on the strength of a FB post) has a dog to love she has nothing else and no inner self-worth.

I can't see me laughing at a FB post that someone adores their dog. I'm a rescuer, my FB is full of dog-lovers and I see that comment all the time. No big deal and I don't assume that's all they have in their lives.

You're an adult now, it;s behind you. Move on, for your own sake, and stop checking up on FB for past trouble-makers from 24 years back.