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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think you should NEVER trust a woman who doesnt have female friends?

191 replies

HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:12

and wonder how they have not accrued any in their life - or what they have done to them to piss them off - or why they can ONLY relate to men?

OP posts:
Original poster
HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:33

exactly raffle.

OP posts:
Sofabitch · 30/08/2011 11:35

Woman are bitches. I don't trust women with lots of woman friends. I know what they say about each other. I spend all day at work listening to it.

GloriaVanderbilt · 30/08/2011 11:35

I don't have a lot of friends, male or female, but I do have a few of each. I tend to feel far less threatened by men though as I got on very well with my dad and was hated by my mother and sister.

How could that kind of upbringing NOT make me uncomfortable around women? I always expect, subconsciously, that they too will hate me. I know why it is, but it doesn't make me know how to get on with them.

I muddle through without an actual clue how they all feel so comfortable together with all the social unspoken rules that come with it.

I think I can be trusted though, now at least. (tries to forget horrible misdemeanours of past)

Pinot · 30/08/2011 11:36

I have a mix of male and female friends but really - meh.

Original poster
HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:36

but surely women ( as sometimes you see on here) can also be teremdously loyal/hardworking etc

how sad that on a female based site we write off OURSELVES as being bad firends - do you say that about yourselves as mates?

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 30/08/2011 11:36

The bitchiest friend I have is actually male Grin

MillyR · 30/08/2011 11:36

I think the sexism is the issue. It is plausible because gay people are in a numerical minority that somebody might have no gay friends but still not be a homophobe. But women are in the numerical majority, so to avoid having any female friends suggests an active avoidance of forming relationships with women.

Pinot · 30/08/2011 11:37

Ooh yes I have a bitch of a male mate. I luff him the MOST.

Original poster
HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:38

i win on the friend venn diagram then as i have a couple of gay male aquaintances who STUN me with their bitchiness.

would never hold them up as exemplars of all men, gay folk, or friends Wink

OP posts:
PeggyCarter · 30/08/2011 11:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

belgo · 30/08/2011 11:38

It is very hard to make good friends, male or female. I would be suspicious of anyone who made sweeping generalisations about one sex.

Original poster
HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:39

lol

OP posts:
raffle · 30/08/2011 11:39

My views are biased as I'm mid 30s and have had the same best friend since I was 8. Also a lovely group of ladies with whom I have been close friends with since high school.

AuntieMonica · 30/08/2011 11:40

i still don't understand why you think a woman with only male friends would be untrustworthy, OP

Pinot · 30/08/2011 11:40

lol?

Original poster
HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:40

but raffle they are all bitches!
occasionally on ehre when there is a divorce going on you hear about rl mates being endlessly kind - like "newidfornow" is experiencing

OP posts:
Itsjustafleshwound · 30/08/2011 11:41

It's all to do with the band of gold around the finger - let's not beat about the bush ....

Original poster
HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:41

really?
tell

OP posts:
OneOfTheBoys · 30/08/2011 11:42

My bf is male, so ok I'd never ask him for fashion advice as he has none, but I can call him at 2am in the morning if I've need to & he has a strong moral streak a mile wide. Would you not trust him because his bf is female?

Hammy02 · 30/08/2011 11:43

I have lost track of the number of times I've heard women slag each other off and then been lovely to their faces. Men do this but nothing like as often as women. IME. I prefer male company. They don't ying on about feck all unlike alot of women.

raffle · 30/08/2011 11:43

I have got bloke mates but they are not in the same league as my girls. We have things in common obviously, but I have WAY more in common with my female friends. Apart from DH of course.

livetolaugh · 30/08/2011 11:44

I have a lot more make friends than female. As others have said, females can be very bitchy. Just because I prefer male company doesn't mean I'm out to snare every man I am friends with, which is what I think the OP is thinking.

MillyR · 30/08/2011 11:44

Oneoftheboys, what has that got to do with somebody having no female friends? I'd also ask that about people who have said they are not untrustworthy when they have got more male friends than female, or that they have 2 female friends, or their best friend is abroad.

What has any of that got to do with being a person who has no female friends?

2littlegreenmonkeys · 30/08/2011 11:45

Some people just find it very difficult to make friends (of any sex) I know I used to be one of those people, even now making friends is very difficult for me. Not because I am untrustworthy or odd, but because that is how I am.

I would find it very difficult to be friends with someone as judgmental as the OP, I would like a friend to like me for me and to take me as I am (or don't if that is the case) I wouldn't want to be judged as unworthy of her friendship (or anyone's for that matter) on the basis of what sex my friends are.

IMHO the OP's statement is an awful sweeping generalization and I am Sad to think that there are people in this world who judge you in such a manner.

MerylStrop · 30/08/2011 11:45

The comments on the OP's "sexism" are mystifying, considering the bordering misogynist crap that wannabe, puddlejumper and sofabitch are coming out with.

I find it a bit odd when women have NO female friends at all or make no effort to get along with other women.

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