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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

help and advice

206 replies

FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 11:26

My husband thinks he is entitled to half my child tax credits. We have three children together which we share contact exactly half and half. we have been separated for 3 years now. I have just recently had a new baby so am not working and just claiming the benefits I am entitled to. He is a full time teacher.

He feels that he is entitled to the tax credit money while I do not as he is working. He puts the children into childcare which costs him a lot each month. He claims not to have any money to spend on himself or the children. What should I do?

OP posts:
HappyMummyOfOne · 26/08/2011 14:38

YABVU, tax credits pay the person who gets child benefit - they have not "chosen you". Given he works to support himself and his children and does 50/50 he sounds a great dad. Split the tax credits and CB 50/50 for the children and keep the amount you get for the new child. Tax credits are not your wage - that would come from working.

Groovee · 26/08/2011 14:52

If the care is 50/50 then why shouldn't he receive 50% of the tax credits. There are 7 days in a week..... so presumably they stay somewhere 4 nights and 3 nights elsewhere. That would make the person with the 4 nights the main carer. If you're claiming the CB too then half off that as well. You wouldn't be granted a divorce unless the financial aspect is sorted out first.

RabbitPie · 26/08/2011 14:57

This reply has been deleted

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MyMamaToldMe · 26/08/2011 15:23

I really think you should do the decent thing and help him with the childcare payments. Why should either of your struggle when the care is 50/50?

TeddyRuxpin · 26/08/2011 15:29

Are the tax credit people aware that the childrens care is split 50/50?

Original poster
FondantFancie · 26/08/2011 15:55

The tax credit people were aware of all the facts when they made their judgement. Tax credits are an income top up for people on a low wage. My husband is a teacher earning a good wage. Am I that wrong?

OP posts:
Earlybird · 26/08/2011 15:58

I'll ask again...

OP - does your new dp (father of baby) support you and/or pay all or some housing/utility/etc costs?

OrganicFreeRangeBoys · 26/08/2011 16:01

Tax credits are also there to help with childcare costs aren't they? (may be wrong, not sure)

If so, then as he pay's childcare costs he should get some of the tax credits.

ShirleyKnot · 26/08/2011 16:03
Yesterdays · 26/08/2011 16:04

I dont get it . Why are they in childcare as opposed to being with you ?

CurrySpice · 26/08/2011 16:06

OP it seems to me that you're saying your husband should be penalised and worse off because he choses to go out, earn a living, and pay his taxes?

Hmmm...you come across as a bit...I dunno...greedy

GalaxyWeaver · 26/08/2011 16:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

glitterkitten · 26/08/2011 16:10

fondant can you not see that the money is calculated for the needs of the children.

You don't have them 50% of the time so you are depriving them of money for your own needs.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

Have you also threatened ex with reducing his time with the kids if he pursues the money?

TeddyRuxpin · 26/08/2011 16:14

If it's child tax credit, it's for the care of the children and buying stuff they need, not a top-up on your earnings/benefits so if the children are with their father exactly 50% of the time surely he is entitled to half the money?

tabulahrasa · 26/08/2011 16:24

stop claiming to be their main carer, let him do that as he has them the same time as you he has just as much right to be their main carer as you do...so he claims child benefit and tax credits for them, you claim for your baby - then it's split for you

Sn0wflake · 26/08/2011 16:25

I don't think that opinions on here are as valid as whatever the TAX credit people have told you.

If they have calculated it for your household and it's just for you and your children then stick with that. If they say you should give some to your ex then do that.

I'm thinking that if he claimed he would have got less anyway. And yes he should be able to get help with childcare separately.

OrganicFreeRangeBoys · 26/08/2011 16:28

Op has 4 children yes?

Does anyone know if it would be possible for her to claim tax credits for the two youngest and the Ex claims for the two oldest children.

Can that even be done?

Scholes34 · 26/08/2011 16:44

I don't understand why the arrangement for a 50/50 split on the time the children spend with each parent should involve the husband having to put the children into childcare, especially if the OP is at home/on maternity leave? If the husband is a full-time teacher, he has time during the holidays to spend with them, and can still maintain contact at weekends.

rainbowinthesky · 26/08/2011 16:46

One day I hope your dc come and read this thread to see what a selfish person they have for a mother. Words fail me.

GinAndWater · 26/08/2011 16:52

OP- YABU

You can split CTC & CB by claiming each for different DC. DH did it with his ExW and it was no problem.

MumblingRagDoll · 26/08/2011 16:52

Does he pay you any money? If he thinks he should get half your tax credits then why doesn't he give you half his wages?

magicmummy1 · 26/08/2011 17:16

But mumbling, why should he pay maintenance to the OP if he has the children for half of the week and bears half of the expenses?

PrincessScrumpy · 26/08/2011 17:25

If he is going to be included and get half then you would have to include his income on your claim form therefore, you would get less (I presume). Otherwise it's fraud!

PrincessScrumpy · 26/08/2011 17:28

All schools I know offer a childcare voucher scheme, in which case he cannot claim tax credits too. Talk to the tax credit people and see what they say.

MumblingRagDoll · 26/08/2011 17:34

But Magicmummy why should the OP pay HIM money since SHE has the chldren for half the week and only has tax credits coming in?

What Princess sai is true...if he wants to think like that then he must be prepared to pool the incomes....split them in half too.

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