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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think i dont deserve to be treated like a prostitute

138 replies

firstly · 15/08/2011 09:43

Im fuming.
I have a sort of no strings thing with this man. But basically this weekend ive been treated like nothing more than a whore.
friday night at gone midnight i got a text of his cock. I hadnt spoken to him for over a week, no contact ( which is fine.. but not even a hello?) he was then annoyed at me that i refused to get out of bed ( i was asleep) and go see him.

Saturday night the same thing happened, but i was out with friends, so he just got annoyed that i didn respond at all.

Last night the same thing happened again, but it was a bit earlier, 9pm. I said i was free tomorrow and if he wanted to do something then, i would but i wasnt going to go round. He got really pissed off and said i didnt do it (!!!!) properly anyway and if was either NOW or not at all.

I am not a prostitute and do not deserve to be treated like one. Yes, i have slept with him in the past, and am not in a relationship with him, and i dont want a relationship with him, but how on earth does he think he can just text me things like that??

Or AIBU?

OP posts:
SardineQueen · 15/08/2011 10:17

I am also a bit confused about this idea that prostitutes get a lot of respect from their clients, zzzen

InMyPrime · 15/08/2011 10:26

He sounds rude and childish, to be honest, so is he worth the hassle?

If you had a casual friendship with someone where you meet for coffee now and again, would you just text them a picture of a cup of coffee, after no other contact for a week, then sulk if they don't respond instantly and then text them stroppily to say that they're boring to talk to anyway?? He sounds like a waste of time so just cut ties and ditch him.

ChaoticAngeloftheUnderworld · 15/08/2011 10:59

Dump him. Just because you have no strings sex with him does not give him the right to treat you with disrespect.

TheFlyingOnion · 15/08/2011 11:03

You are available to him, when he wants, for sex with no commitment...

And you wonder why he has no respect for you?

AnyFucker · 15/08/2011 11:15

So, are you going to shag him again, or what ?

sausagesandmarmelade · 15/08/2011 11:30

If he's not providing what you want then get rid....simple!

If you want sex with friendship...then make that plain.

He's obviously misinterpreted what you want.

Original poster
firstly · 15/08/2011 11:42

No, i will not be shagging him again.

Sex can be no strings but still be treated with a little bit of respect. Im not asking for dinners and romance. Heck, i dont even want his time ( bar about an hour of it)

But i dont really want to be booty called at midnight and then for a strop to be thrown because i dont do what he says.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 15/08/2011 11:44

He just sounds like a twat, tbh

Best jettisoned with a rocket up his arse

TheMonster · 15/08/2011 11:44

Ask him for some money and say then you will go around. Grin

Whatmeworry · 15/08/2011 11:46

I have a no strings relationship...

Except you wanted strings. He could have been less of an arse though.

Pandemoniaa · 15/08/2011 11:46

I seriously think that if anyone texted me a picture of their cock it wouldn't matter how no-strings the relationship, he'd be history. I am assuming that he's left secondary school, btw, because I thought that the novelty of phones with cameras and the pirate in men's pants would have worn off long ago in an adult.

I've had a no-strings relationship as it happens. It was a mutually respectful arrangement even if there was lots of shagging.So no, YANBU in wanting a bit more respect or some sex but pick the fuck buddy more carefully next time.

Original poster
firstly · 15/08/2011 11:46

lol. i may just do that.

OP posts:
muminthemiddle · 15/08/2011 11:51

He sounds like a dick.

Original poster
firstly · 15/08/2011 11:54

and he is one as well.

Doesnt matter, i shant see him again, i was more indignant at being told 'it was now or not at all'
than anything else, i mean, noone talks to me like that.

OP posts:
ButWhyIsTheGinGone · 15/08/2011 12:00

OP - there's nothing wrong with simply wanting sex without the hassle of a relationship. As long as you are careful, where's the problem? The issue is THIS man is a demanding tosser. In fact he sounds like a complete twat! I have a guy who I see on a NSA basis and it's been going on for about 18 months with no problems whatsoever. Mainly because he always brings a bottle of wine/DVD round and we make a nice evening of it. No - find yourself someone decent!

ButWhyIsTheGinGone · 15/08/2011 12:01

Urgh - just noticed the bit about the picture of his cock. Is he 15? Are you supposed to fall to your knees in lust?? Foul!

lubeybooby · 15/08/2011 12:02

YANBU

He has been an utter twat. I've had no strings things going on in the past and never been treated like that. Don't have anything further to do with him.

somewherewest · 15/08/2011 12:12

Sorry, this is a bit blunt, but is this really the first indication you've got that this man is a selfish asshole who basically treats you like a sex object?

A little bit of me thinks that this is the 'logical' outcome of no strings attached, but I'm possibly being unfair....

somewherewest · 15/08/2011 12:15

PS I tried no strings attached and it didn't work. The ones who really did want no strings were pricks. The one who wasn't a prick also turned out to be unsuited to no strings attached. In fact he was a lovely guy who I unwittingly hurt.

DogsBestFriend · 15/08/2011 12:20

It's not the logical outcome of no strings attached sex at all, somewherewest. It's the outcome because this guy's a dick.

Firstly, you said, "friday night at gone midnight i got a text of his cock....
Saturday night the same thing happened, but i was out with friends..."

So tell me - why didn't you pass the phone around to the entire pub/club/whathaveyou and all have a bloody good laugh at him? :o

DrGruntFotter · 15/08/2011 12:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

maras2 · 15/08/2011 12:37

Butwhyisthegingone.Ithought that it was a typo about the txt subject. Boak !

Quodlibet · 15/08/2011 12:44

Nothing wrong with a bit of no-strings fuckbuddying but I wouldn't be having sex with anyone with such appalling manners. You have to treat your sexual partners with the same respect you'd treat your friends in my book.

He's clearly got hilariously deluded ideas about the effect on women that a picture of his cock will have, too. Why do men do this? It's bizarre.

Original poster
firstly · 15/08/2011 12:54

i did show everyone :)

everyone laughed.

OP posts:
ShoutyHamster · 15/08/2011 12:55

Nothing wrong with no strings, a lot wrong with him being a rude entitled pig.

Same as any other 'friendship'. If your mate wanted to go for coffee, but texted you 'Get here NOW you lazy cow, I want to go out and catch up with you' - what would you say? Err, fuck off?!

That's where the OP is. Don't miss the point by getting all Mary Whitehouse about their arrangement.

OP, he's a rude twat. Ditch him, just block his number. He's pointless. And cock pics are naffer than naff.

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