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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU Partner putting restrictions on my internet use

114 replies

mum0ftw0 · 02/08/2011 16:41

He has banned youtube.
I use youtube to watch music videos, perhaps 5 per day, and also I watch various things such as recently watching lots of videos on Autism, because my child is going through a diagnosis right now.

He banned youtube without talking to me about the possibility of banning it.

He says it uses too much bandwidth and we're over our limit, yet he's allowing next door to use our internet in exchange for 5 pound a month.

Do you think he's being controlling?

Shall I arrange to have my own seperate internet connection?

OP posts:
stupefy · 02/08/2011 16:43

I think you ought to arrange a divorce.

Empusa · 02/08/2011 16:43

"Do you think he's being controlling?"

Just a bit.

What else does he control like this?

pjmama · 02/08/2011 16:44

I'd tell him to fuck right off, frankly.

If it's getting expensive to run, then you discuss it like adults and decide how to reduce the cost. You don't treat your partner like a bloody child and "ban" them from anything.

IWantWine · 02/08/2011 16:44

No. YANBU if he is allowing next door to use your internet and YANBU because he didnt consult you.

He is being controlling IMO.

Is this just a 'one off'? or are there other instances where you feel is is controlling?

Is

Birdsgottafly · 02/08/2011 16:45

It would be cheaper to pay for unlimited usage.
Ofcourse he is being controlling.
This isn't about internet use, the running of the household and finances should be being decided jointly.

bananasplitz · 02/08/2011 16:45

how much is it costing to keep going over the limit

IWantWine · 02/08/2011 16:46

'he' is controlling!

Empusa · 02/08/2011 16:46

Also, youtube doesn't use that much bandwidth. To be making a real dent in your bandwidth you'd have to be watching the equivalent of a couple of high definition films a day.

On top of that you do not get charged for bandwidth, and it's only a problem if you go over the fair usage policy. Which is a huge amount, and is aimed more at people who download movies/games/software.

This isn't about bandwidth.

unfitmother · 02/08/2011 16:47

YANBU, he certainly is

AgentZigzag · 02/08/2011 16:47

Shock I'm just trying to imagine my DH doing that...nope...can't.

What a cheeky bastard.

Don't let him treat you like a child.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 02/08/2011 16:48

YANBU... That's very odd behaviour from your partner. He's charging next door for using your broadband but you're not to use it? Don't know what his rationale is but it doesn't sound like a healthy, adult relationship to me.

thursday · 02/08/2011 16:48

what Empusa said. and of course its controlling. are you a child?

Birdsgottafly · 02/08/2011 16:49

Also has he banned next door from watching youtube?

IWantWine · 02/08/2011 16:54

How can he actually 'ban' youtube' anyway? Am I showing my ignorance lol?

AgentZigzag · 02/08/2011 17:01

Some kind of parental settings IWantWine?

TottWriter · 02/08/2011 17:02

Are you serious? Because if this is true, YANBU. That is the most ridiculous suggestion I've ever heard.

Also, how did you get to the point where you allow your neighbours to use the internet? They could be doing anything and you would be responsible! I would apologise to them and say that you don't want to continue your agreement, then change the password.

HuntForGalaxyHazelnut · 02/08/2011 17:03

Agree with birdsgottafly there's no point you being banned from youtube when next door could be shagging through your allowance.

Obviously he is being a grade A wanker anyway to be 'banning' you from doing things in your own house, but it smacks of control that he's only doing this to you, while still being happy for next door to use the internet.

What a cock.

Cruntie · 02/08/2011 17:12

How much is your monthly limit? Even the cheapest plans should allow viewing of a few youtube vids.

What else do you use this bandwidth for?

eurochick · 02/08/2011 17:13

He sounds like a controlling twonk.

Original poster
mum0ftw0 · 02/08/2011 17:14

He has used parental control bassically.
Something I have no idea on how to change.

He told me he warned me to stop using youtube.
And he says he's banned us all now, next door, and him.

Next door asked him to use our internet, as they used the previous neighbour's.
He says they only use the internet for facebook.

I also think he's treating me like a child.
But with everyone else, other than me, he does constant favours because he's the local nice guy.

OP posts:
catgirl1976 · 02/08/2011 17:26

Erm - controlling and cheap. Sorry.

AgentZigzag · 02/08/2011 17:27

'He told me he warned me to stop using youtube.'

That's something your parents say to you when you're 8.

How do you react when he talks to you like that?

AgentZigzag · 02/08/2011 17:28

Because he must think he can get away with talking to you like that or he'd not say it IYSWIM?

ChristinedePizan · 02/08/2011 17:29

He has used parental control. But you're not a child. What a wanker

maypole1 · 02/08/2011 17:29

Are you sure he's not got something on you tube he dose not want you to see

Thats the only thing I could think off

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