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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Private school or bigger house?

301 replies

joric · 21/07/2011 18:05

Less AIBU more WWYD....

Will keep it short...

60/70k will put DD through private school and we would stay in our modest house
or
we could increase mortgage by same amount and buy a similar standard of house in better area with v good state school nearby.

WWYD?

OP posts:
SpottyFrock · 21/07/2011 19:04

Choices here were not based on either exam results or a sense of elitism either. But I don't need to justify.

QuestionTime · 21/07/2011 19:10

Private every time

SpottyFrock · 21/07/2011 19:11

Malcolm, if you've never come across a state school were 90% could afford fees then you've never been to east Cheshire! Every other car at the state school gate is a new range rover and the bling would make your eyes water! Grin

Incidentally, I would have chosen state in a heartbeat had our catchment school offered any incline of vibrancy or fun. The headteacher was obsessed with their results as if that was all I needed to know.

But this isn't a state vs private debate. The op needs to look at what's available to her.

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:20

Well, the amount of money spent will be the same in both senarios

same size house in better area = 70k +
v
Private education for 5 years = 70k +

How to spend 70k...?!!

OP posts:
Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:22

Should read:

same size house in better area + state sch = 70k +
v
Private education for 5 years = 70k +

OP posts:
scarlettsmummy2 · 21/07/2011 19:23

private school, its about more than just the level of education, it is the extra doors it opens too. Sorry if that offends but it is true.

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:24

Spotty, ahh East Cheshire..( and the likes!) Yes, you know where I'm coming from

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 21/07/2011 19:26

It can build a lot of family resentment when your little darling doesnt perform to the high standards that you expect after you have sacrificed any enjoyment in your own lives to fund their education, especially when a perfectly adequate state education exists for every child in this country.

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:27

Scarlet- not so much doors but positive , interesting experience yes... Results come second place to that!

OP posts:
orienteerer · 21/07/2011 19:28

Education

MABS · 21/07/2011 19:28

Private always, but dd at senior is 18k per year and ds at prep is 13k so not sure what area you are in that 70k would cover it. good luck with your decision

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:31

Squeaky, as I say, results aren't the be all- ex curr. / opportunities. V. Important. A lot of state schools are good in this area, many are not so good.

OP posts:
Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:31

MABS 12k senior - more for 6th

OP posts:
ChristinedePizan · 21/07/2011 19:32

I think a good state school will get your child to where you want them to be. A house will appreciate, fees are gone. And if your DD doesn't do particularly well (and many children don't) will you resent the fees? How will you support her through university whichever option she chooses?

I was privately educated and I'm not sure that it had any bearing on what I have or haven't achieved in life (currently am a single mum living on benefits so make of that what you will :o).

And I don't agree that doors are opened to you necessarily. If you go to a 'good' private school, maybe. A run of the mill one, no benefit IMO

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:33

We're not talking Marlborough!

OP posts:
wordfactory · 21/07/2011 19:33

squeaky the op hasn't said she won't be able to have any fun if she takes the independent option. She's not proposing to bankrupt herself.

Indeed she won't be in a worse position financially if she moves into the better catchment will she? She'll still have to raise her mortgage payments.

Or are you suggesting she stay in the catchment of the poor school and spend the cash on wine women and song?

usualsuspect · 21/07/2011 19:33

Bigger house ,no question

floosiemcwoosie · 21/07/2011 19:34

Is there anyone else in your area whose child attends the private school?

Is your area good or bad? Do you think moving house would benefit your DD?

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:34

Christine - I would very much resent fees if she was bored and/or unhappy there yes...:(

OP posts:
wordfactory · 21/07/2011 19:35

usual bigger house but stay put in the catchmnet of a poor school that the op doesn't rate?
Really?

MarshaBrady · 21/07/2011 19:36

It's very close, joric. Not much in it at all.

Have you visited both. What do you think of them?

wordfactory · 21/07/2011 19:36

Crikey if either of mine were bored or unhappy I would consdier the school in breach of contract and whip them out.

And the school could whistle for any fees owed.

Not. A. Chance.

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:37

Word- the money will be spent whichever choice is made yes.!
I think the massive house in current area is not an option!

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 21/07/2011 19:38

yes ,really

I wouldn't have sent my kids private even if I could have afforded it

Original poster
joric · 21/07/2011 19:40

It is a close call marsha! I have 12 mths to decide- move or no move!
Word, would you? Would they accept criticism at school?

OP posts: