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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I just don't want their dog here

450 replies

WinkyWinkola · 17/07/2011 11:18

Pil are coming to visit this weekend. They stay in a hotel as our house is too small to accommodate them.

Mil has this ancient dog that is blind and well, imo, ready to be put down. She wants to bring it with them. It will have to stay with us whilst they are in the hotel.

I don't want the dog here, especially not a disabled one that will probably poo and wee every where. We don't have a garden as it's currently a building site.

If I wanted a dog, I'd get one. I don't so I won't. I've got 3 dcs and that's really enough for me. Plus all the cooking and hospitality for pil this weekend - which of course I don't mind but I think bringing the dog is an imposition.

Aibu?

OP posts:
EndoplasmicReticulum · 17/07/2011 17:03

DogsBest - not for you, as you obviously like dogs, big clue in your username!

Point is, the OP doesn't like dogs, so it's a bit of an imposition on the part of her inlaws to assume they'll look after theirs, even without taking the puddles of wee into account.

Claw3 · 17/07/2011 17:05

Linerunner is spot on, pardon the pun!

KurriKurri · 17/07/2011 17:06

You don't have to carry blind dogs, they can still walk, as has been said repeatedly dogs rely more on their sense of smell. Being blind is a much smaller deal for a dog than it is for a person, I can't believe the casual idea of killing an animal because it's old and no longer perfect. There's nothing to suggest the dog is in pain or suffering.

Some people seem to be having a compassion bypass on here today.

My dad is old, blind, confused and incontinent, - maybe I should look into getting him culled.

DogsBestFriend · 17/07/2011 17:08

I quite agree (as I said up-thread), that the OP's home is her castle and all that Endoplas-blimey-that's-a-long-name! :o

I don't like other people's small children and would be saying the same if someone wanted to leave their DC with me. It's not that which rankles, it's the dismissive attitude towards the dog which the non-dog owning OP considers "Is ready to be put down" which pisses me off.

TidyDancer · 17/07/2011 17:09

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DogsBestFriend · 17/07/2011 17:11

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Claw3 · 17/07/2011 17:11

Kurri, i thought a blind dog might be confused in unfamilar surroundings. The OP already stated that her MIL carries the dog around in a bag, because it is blind. Still we wont split hairs, i will re-phrase.

  1. Not everyone wants to care for a dog who will be such high maintenance, especially if you have 3 dc's to care for.
DogsBestFriend · 17/07/2011 17:13

Claw, having fostered a couple of blind dogs IME they adapt incredibly quickly. All it takes are some simple common sense measures, such as not having a coffee table in the middle of the room/between sitting room and kitchen doors etc.

Andrewofgg · 17/07/2011 17:13

A dog is not a child. If you don't like children you may sometimes have to accept their presence in your home as the price of the presence of the parent(s).

Not so with dogs. Love me, love my dog is an amusing slogan but it is bollocks.

Unfortunately some dog-owners are under the illusion that the dog is part of the family as a child would be - which it is not.

No dog-owner should ever expect to take the dog to somebody else's home without asking first and being willing to accept the answer NO.

TidyDancer · 17/07/2011 17:14

You're welcome. :)

And yes, it was very well said, and I seconded it for that reason. Never have I encountered a person on here more worthy of being called that.

dustwhatdust · 17/07/2011 17:15

OP and intolerant others, especially Lachesis :

You all sound pretty mean spirited generally. You put yourself out for family for one weekend for pitys sake

I wouldn't want to come to your house anyway , you're probably a pretty poor host too !

Claw3 · 17/07/2011 17:18

Dogsbestfriend, i accept your experience of blind dogs and that it might not be confused. However i still think its unfair on both the OP and the dog.

DogsBestFriend · 17/07/2011 17:19

Andrew, I agree with you that "No dog-owner should ever expect to take the dog to somebody else's home without asking first and being willing to accept the answer NO".

Absolutely, no question about it.

I don't ever have to accept the presence of small children in my house either, I'm happy to pass on the company of their parents.

IN THIS HOUSE MY THREE DOGS ARE EVERY BIT AS MUCH A PART OF THE FAMILY AS MY CHILDREN. You are foolish to tell me otherwise... what, am I lying? Is it not a fact that I believe this to be the case? Do you think I'm saying it to amuse you?

Like fuck I am!

You cannot possibly comment on my or others' outlooks and ethics on this issue.

KurriKurri · 17/07/2011 17:20

I appreciate the OP doesn't want the dog staying, - thats her prerogative it's her home. As I've said, I would have no problem with it, we are a very dog orientated family and I often have dog visitors, or dog sit for relative when they go on holiday. I don't have a proplem with clearing up mess, or doggy smell or 'high maintenance' things. Don't have a problem with mucking out small kids either.

I'm surprised the dog is carried around in a bag, I've known several blind dogs and have never seen any of them carried around, but maybe he does get confused in unfamiliar places, I concede that. I would gradually let him get accustomed to the house and confine him to one or two rooms so he didn't bump into things.

I just feel sickened by the suggestions of killing the dog, dumping it somewhere etc., even if it is somehow meant as a 'joke' its not funny. It's disgusting. I find cruelty to any living thing, human or animal, appalling.

DogsBestFriend · 17/07/2011 17:20

TidyDancer, don't speak too soon. Wink

TidyDancer · 17/07/2011 17:23

Oh Lord, who let Andrew out of his cage?

DooinMeCleanin · 17/07/2011 17:26

Why are the op's wishes more important than her husbands?

DogsBestFriend · 17/07/2011 17:27

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Malcontentinthemiddle · 17/07/2011 17:27

DBF - 'IN THIS HOUSE MY THREE DOGS ARE EVERY BIT AS MUCH A PART OF THE FAMILY AS MY CHILDREN.'

Seriously? You love your dogs as much as your kids?

Andrewofgg · 17/07/2011 17:28

Hello again, DBF - hope you are well!

If you know the OP in the post in which we locked horns earlier this week - no names here - I'd be glad in an inquisitive way to know how it turned out when she read her contract.

Sure, you can exclude small children too. That is your privilege. Just one less often exercised than that of excluding dogs.

In the end I don't think we disagree about the issue in this thread. OP is NBU.

KurriKurri I abhor cruelty to animals, but keeping them alive can be just that. And swatting a fly is taking its life but I think we all do it. And without giving it a thought.

Kladdkaka · 17/07/2011 17:29

'No dog-owner should ever expect to take the dog to somebody else's home without asking first and being willing to accept the answer NO'

What about service dogs?

reelingintheyears · 17/07/2011 17:29

I said it too...ALOuiseG

And he is.

Kladdkaka · 17/07/2011 17:30

Police dogs?

TidyDancer · 17/07/2011 17:30

DBF, you bad girl! You didn't say lachesis was a cunt did you? You wouldn't do a thing like that, surely?! Grin Wink

Claw3 · 17/07/2011 17:32

I love my dog, he is part of the family, not the same as my children, but as a pet.