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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to bring DD (3) to a proffessional talk?

145 replies

MilaV · 07/07/2011 20:02

Reason in simple: both XP and my regular bsbysitting will be working at that time. The talk will be about my field, design, with a few prominent people giving their views. I really don't want to miss it, and then I remembered a friend who used to take his child to all places with her. I plan to go with DD and some colouring books and pencils. Of course if she makes noise we'll go out, but I'm quite nervous and at the same time excited about the idea of sharing this part of my life with her. Do you think AIBU? Think they won't let me in?

OP posts:
LRDTheFeministNutcase · 08/07/2011 23:43

To be fair, GML, after this thread even the OP probably isn't surprised that her DD didn't end up doing the 'sharing part of my life' bit!

If she just say quietly it's not a bad outcome for the mum or the other people at the talk.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 08/07/2011 23:47

Fair enough. I could cope with the 'shit I've got no childcare and I need to go to work today' aspect. It was the 'I'm taking my child so we can bond over our shared experiences in my place of work' that made me Hmm and :o

I'll put my boxing gloves away then Wink

Gooseberrybushes · 08/07/2011 23:58

I bet everybody was gritting.

Gooseberrybushes · 08/07/2011 23:58

actually gritting like mad Grin but she's impervious, so will never know

LRDTheFeministNutcase · 09/07/2011 00:01

I wonder if the OP's initial reaction weren't a panicky 'OMG, crisis, I must be a super-wonderful mum .... I know! Actually, it will be great for DD to see me at work!'

I could understand persuading myself that sort of thing .... nutty, but sort of understandably nutty.

Parietal · 09/07/2011 02:58

OP - can I ask if you are an academic? So far, it seems that only the academics (myself included) think bringing children to work meetings is ok.

Glad it went well.

bonkers20 · 09/07/2011 07:23

I'm an academic and would not bring my child to work, apart from maybe swinging by the office on the way to the on-site nursery.

Original poster
MilaV · 09/07/2011 09:21

I think it was positive for her to see the way adults interact and what her mummy does, hence I am glad to have shared it with her.

Of course, if it makes you happy to think otherwise, go on :)

Seriously, I can't believe I was getting so much shit from other fellow mums. Thanks for those who supported my idea, and to all those who even disagreeing, tried to express their views with respect. The rest, well... have a nice day too! (I'm not going to spoil my weekend telling you to bug off! - oh there, I did it). :)

OP posts:
Goblinchild · 09/07/2011 09:26

Please don't bother to share next time you want to do something like this with your DD, it was a pointless waste of everyone's time.

Gooseberrybushes · 09/07/2011 09:31

yes it does feel like that rather doesn't it

it's rare to come across people quite so impervious

HelloKlitty · 09/07/2011 12:41

If it was a waste then WHY are you still here? Confused Glad it went well Mila.

FreudianSlipper · 09/07/2011 12:47

i take ds to many things that other parents may not (dinners out etc) because i am single and would miss out but within reason, but not where it is all adults, aimed at adults for them to benefit educationally from. they need to be able to listen without interruptions or distractions. i agree children are part of society but there are limitations its not fair on others and childcare issues are often a problem for all parents and at times we have to miss out on something

Goblinchild · 09/07/2011 12:53

'If it was a waste then WHY are you still here?'

I'm always here, i live in the cupboard with the hoover in a corner of MNHQ.
It just seemed like a pointless question to ask if her mind was already made up. It went well from the OP's POV, we have no way of knowing what the other people at the talk felt about it.

LRDTheFeministNutcase · 09/07/2011 12:58

To be fair, Goblin, she did take the suggestion that she check with the organizers first - so she didn't just ignore what people said. To my mind that was the big issue, as extra people in a room can be a real problem for organizers.

Goblinchild · 09/07/2011 13:03

Did she check ahead?
I must have missed that post. Smile

LRDTheFeministNutcase · 09/07/2011 13:21

Yeah, she says she did - I noticed because it was me who said she'd be rude not to! My mate has just finished helping organize a conference where they'd planned numbers very carefully only to find some wanker showed up with his wife and was cross that all the chairs in the room were full ... when we'd been told already they were counting heads. Hmm

emptyshell · 09/07/2011 13:22

Oh and the "you're fellow mummies so you MUST agree that me dragging my child into a completely inappropriate situation is acceptable" card finally comes out. If 90% of the people on here are telling you you were being an inconsiderate twunt - the reason is that you WERE being an inconsiderate twunt.

I swear they should rename AIBU into "tell me I'm right now please".

Journey · 09/07/2011 13:25

This post is so bizarre it is funny. I can't believe people really have such ridiculous expectations of what a 3 year old can gain from attending a presentation.

HSMM · 09/07/2011 13:27

I would say no, except that I always used to go everywhere with my Dad when he was working, or going to watch, or listen to something.

I wouldn't do it myself though :)

HSMM · 09/07/2011 13:31

Glad it went well

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