AIBU to expect my SIL NOT to open a parcel addressed to my nephew?

[alison222]

I sent a birthday present to my nephew and had a message today to say it had arrived safely and that she approved of my choice of wrapping paper. This means she opened the parcel addressed to him. I had marked it with sender on it so she knew it was from me and she told me what he would like so she knows what it is. He will be 9. Part of the pleasure of getting a parcel is to be able to open it yourself surely?

okay, everyone who thinks that it's not depriving:
do this for me.

next time you receive a present for your own birthday, leave it wrpaped in its original wrapping until the day, then open it.
Please do exactly the same for the children - leave it in its original packaging until the day.

see how different it feels, and how much more exciting that you've got a birthday present in the post on your birthday

oh, and if you let people now that the present arrived safely - how do you not recognize the handwriting on the address?! and why would anyone expect you to thank them for a present before the day of the birthday???

I'll do it but I very much doubt it will be anymore exciting. In fact it'll probably annoy the boys as they have double the wrapping to get through.

Insomnia
"People who enjoy opening brown paper parcels need to shop online more..."

I run a business.
I receive on average 2 or 3 packets every day - from the postman in the form of jiffy bags, or from a courier driver in the form of a huge box.
I still get excited when I get home and find there are letters for me there!
(and a bit disappointed when I find that all the letters are for DH )

i've never thought about it before but i would have opened it too... (just the jiffy bag or whatever not the wrapping paper)

I always take away any cards/presents that arrive before the big day and do the big pile on the birthday morning.. but they are only 6 and 3.

so, does that mean Pass the Parcel isn't exciting then?

I don't think opening a letter addressed to your minor child would be a criminal offence.
Op did the package say who it was from on the outside? If I didn't know who had sent it i would def open it!

But nickelbabe, if you strip it of the brown paper as soon as it arrives then you get the thrill of unwrapping it and seeing the paper and looking at the shape and then you get to unwrap it again! on your birthday. Doing both together is less fun not more.

But I promise that next time I recieve birthday presents in the post for the DC - if I trust the donors in question to have gift-wrapped it - I will let them open the initial parcel before I whisk it away. Happy?

i think i have to thank god that I've married someone who feels the same way as me about this.

i can imagine divorce proceedings against someone who thought it was okay to open my post

if the child is capable of opening the packet without ripping the contents, then the child should be given the packet in the same condition it arrived.

Also...and this will outrage some of you I know, I have been known to open the packaging of toys we've bought for them, assemble the toy then wrap it up so there isn't 25 minutes of faffing about with nasty wires and they can just play with it when it's opened.

Oh and at about midnight on Christmas Eve one year DH and I stumbled about, giggling, tired and slightly pissed, whispering "WTF is this piece?" assembling Rose Cottage wendy house for DD1 in her room.

She failed to notice it at all on Christmas morning and ran straight into our room. We said "Has Father Christmas left you any presents in your room?" She ran back to her room...short silence...then she ran back in again and exclaimed excitedly "Oooh yes, and he has brought me a barn!"

Dilys - no, it doesn't work like that

I would feel like i had somehow violated the packet!

YANBU

Maybe I got rubbish presents but the brown paper and all the 'postiness' was way more exciting than the content. Still is, usually! It's a bit sad that kids are having that denied and I don't see a reason for it really.

Even now I get excited about something coming from Amazon even though I know what's in it. There is something about opening something that's come in the mail. I love sending my friends gifts through the post even though I could wait til I saw them, because I know it's more exciting that way.

When I send stuff to my 'littler' friends/relatives I tend to put the adult's name on the front purely because I know it will be them who has to go get it from the delivery office or sign for it, so it seems to avoid any hassle. With a 9 year old it's different though as they are more than capable of signing for their own parcel or whatever.

Insomnia - wouldn't do that either.

Dilys completely ignore the second part ofyour post.
yes please, that would make me happy. :)

"It's a bit sad that kids are having that denied and I don't see a reason for it really."

Because they don't find it any more exciting? Because it makes not one blind bit of difference?

Well if we've learnt nothing else from this thread we've discovered that nickelbabe has found the perfect profession to satisfy her fetish personality, which is nice .

Spiderpig8 Yes I wrote my name on the outside of the parcel - "from..."- i always do this - what if it has to be returned to sender for some unfortunate accident - I don't want the post office opening it either

YAB a bit U

Yes it might have been exciting for the DN to unwrap the parcel as arrived in the post.

But on the other hand he might have been unexcited by a boring brown parcel compared with all his other brightly wrapped ones.

Ultimately it's for your SIL to decide what's best really and this is a really petty thing to be bothered about.

I wouldn't open any post addressed to them, even if they were only 2 yrs but I hide birthday cards and presents until the day. I take of the brown outer wrapping-I can't imagine anyone getting excited about it, my DCs never have and I certainly don't. I have a nice, brightly coloured pile, no one knows what it is until they open it. I can see them looking incredulous if I said 'I thought you wouldn't want to miss the excitement of brown paper'!
Families have their own traditions-I don't think it important. It isn't opening post because it isn't opened.

i think the sil is a control freak, i would definately let child open it

Why does her saying she approved of your choice of wrapping paper mean she opened it? She could have watched your DN open it.

We always take the brown parcel paper off presents that arrive for the dses and for eachother - and no-one has ever expressed any disappointment whatsoever that they didn't get to take it off on the day.

I honestly do not see any problem with what the OP's SIL has done. I'm sure her nephew will be really happy about the present she has bought him and will not need therapy/consolation because he didn't get to take off the brown paper.

I'd have given it to DC, brown paper, yards of sellotape and all. Getting something through the post is really exciting when you're a kid.

Even NOW I get excited at opening stuff that comes through the post except bills and that's when I've ordered things for myself from ebay. What's all this about pretty looking 'present piles'?