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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have told my friend to fuck off and mind her own buisness

87 replies

Pumpernickel10 · 20/06/2011 13:23

I don't think IABU here. Was talking pocket money, my DD gets £10 a week which she saves in the bank and £5 each of her grandparents.
My friend said it was too much money for a 10 yr old. She saves most of it and doesn't buy crap so told friend to fuck off and keep opinions to herself.

OP posts:
ShirleyKnot · 20/06/2011 13:24

I want an eyebrow in hairline emoticon.

[eyebrows]

Mabelface · 20/06/2011 13:24

I think you were rather rude, actually! It IS a lot of money for a 10 year old, even if she does save it.

LindyHemming · 20/06/2011 13:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

caughtinanet · 20/06/2011 13:25

YABU - if she's your friend why would you speak to her like that? Isn't she allowed to express opinions different to yours ?

wimpybar · 20/06/2011 13:25

charming, what a nice friend you seem to be

MorelliOrRanger · 20/06/2011 13:25

£80 a month? That is a alot of money for a 10 year old, but if she saves most of it YANBU.

My DD gets £10 a months (she's 4) and she can spend half of it on whatever she wants. Crap or not.

Buda · 20/06/2011 13:25

YABU. She expressed an opinion.

The fact that you don't like that opinion is not enough to tell a friend to F* off.

WhoAteMySnickers · 20/06/2011 13:26

YABU. You were discussing pocket money and your friend expressed an opinion.

Charming.

GypsyMoth · 20/06/2011 13:26

a tad harsh dont you think???

faintpositive · 20/06/2011 13:27

Wow! i wish i had it in me to tell every one i wanted this! What a brave lady you are.
I would probably end up with NO friends at all though becuase everyone has an opinion dont they.

What does your dd do to earn this money, or do you just give it to her? (curious)

GooseyLoosey · 20/06/2011 13:27

Wow - that;s nearly £100 a month and £1000 plus pounds a year. If she is saving most of it, that's great, but can she access it whenever she wants to or does it do into account that she can only have when she is say 18? If the latter, then I think its OK. If the former, then I think it's too much and am not surprised that your friend said so. My view could be changed by context - are you very, very wealthy?

soverylucky · 20/06/2011 13:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ShirleyKnot · 20/06/2011 13:27

Wait hang on...

Does DD get £10.00 per week off you. Plus £5.00 off each set of grandparents? Which means £20.00 per week?

Or

Does she get £10.00 per week total?

or £10.00 / week from you plus £5.00 from the grandparents which equals £15.00?

thegruffalosma · 20/06/2011 13:29

Well it kind of depends as to whether it's too much. I assume the OP isn't going to let her get out hundreds of pounds of savings in one go and splurge it on crap. And if someone out 10 aside per week for their kids future that wouldn't be considered to be odd.
I think the friend was sticking her bib in - nothing t do with her imo but I wouldn't have told her to fuck off - unless it was in a jokey way but secretly I meant it Grin

MorelliOrRanger · 20/06/2011 13:31

Whoops didn't read you told her to eff off, just thought you'd told her to mind her own business.

YABU to say eff off to your friend whatever they have done.

donnie · 20/06/2011 13:31

yes, totally unreasonable. You ought to appear on the jeremy kyle show as you remind me of his 'guests'.

Vicky2011 · 20/06/2011 13:31

Did you REALLY tell her to fuck off?

FWIW I think £80 a month IS a lot for a 10 yr old but it does depend what the money is for (ie does she need to buy clothes with it) but in truth I'm struggling to understand what kind of friendship you can have that wld result in an expression of opinion illiciting a "fuck off" from you Confused

zukiecat · 20/06/2011 13:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 20/06/2011 13:33

How did you get onto the subject, pumpernickel?

I think perhaps your reaction was a bit extreme... just a tadge.... is she still speaking to you?

twolittlemonkeys · 20/06/2011 13:34

It is a lot for a 10 year old. A couple of pounds per week is enough. By all means save the rest for her (university/ car/ house deposit) but I think you are being unreasonable.

diddl · 20/06/2011 13:35

So she actually gets 10GBP per week to spend on herself?

I think that even that is a lot tbh.

Why did you overreact so?

You were discussing something, friend gave an opinion, what´s the big deal?

She wasn´t insulting-but you were!

TooManyBrownies · 20/06/2011 13:37

YABU. Maybe just agreeing to disagree may have been a little less harsh and provocative?

5Foot5 · 20/06/2011 13:38
  1. Personally I think that is a lot of money for a 10 year old, but I accept that is my opinion and you have the right to make up your own mind on the subject.
  1. If you were discussing this subject (any subject) with your friend then surely it is to be expected that she will express an opinion?
  1. Even if you didn't like what she had to say you were EXTEMELY rude and if anyone spoke to me like that they would be an ex-freiend very quickly.
BupcakesandCunting · 20/06/2011 13:39

I need better parents.

LDNmummy · 20/06/2011 13:40

I'm confused, if its pocket money then she would be spending it wouldn't she? Pocket money is spending money and money for saving is not pocket money. Or am I getting it wrong?

I think deep down you know its excessive for a 10 year old and thats why you got so defensive.

I don't think it is excessive if it is being saved though, but that isn't pocket money is it?