Husband of a friend telling off my child

[900cherry]

I was invited out this morning with some neighbours who are good friends. The husband is known to be snappy and to have little patience with his own children.
In the space of an hour, he told my 4 year old daughter to 'stop whining' and in a cafe, he snapped at her to 'OI, STOP THAT' when she kicked him under the table ( she was doing it playfully). My daughter burst into tears and came and sat on my lap. When his wife, who is a good friend, commented to him to calm down, he agressively responded 'Its not my problem if she's crying cos I told her off for not kicking me. She can deal with it'.

She is 4.

I said nothing as I didn't want to upset his wife, who I know was mortified.

I really want to email him tomorrow to tell him how inappropriate and uncalled for it was. AIBU? What would you do?

PS. The ironic thing is, he has an obnoxious daughter who is really badly behaved and I say nothing!

Animation - sounds like you have not read the thread proberly. it was not an over re-action infact could be discribed as a snap.

Also her daughter did not swing her leg. She kicked him on purpose. What her reason why is any ones guess.

Joy... God yes, we'll be ordering another pot of tea and splitting the last eclair between us..

Cherry - but did you also admonish your daughter for kicking your friend whilst you comforted her? Have you made her apologise? What will you do and say the next time she behaves like this?

MrSpoc I have never tried to justify the mum and childs behaviour actually (where did you get that from?) but have said that the mans reaction was over the top. His own wife told him to calm down and was mortified so I don't think it could have been a playful "oi stop that" but an agressive "oi stop that". His wife wouldn't have taken any notice otherwise.

Anyone who snaps LOOKS angry - there is a physical transformation in the facial expression.

FM, smacks to me like you are looking for justification for your arguement.

Animation Totally agree. If the punishment fitted the crime then the OP wouldn't have posted in the first place, as she has at no point said that she won't allow other people to tell her child off.

Cherry - I don't need to look for justification for my argument but I haven't insulted or been nasty to you and I don't understand why you are going after me in this way. Especially since I was asking questions to get a better understanding of the situation. But you won't answer my questions, since you're at work, but you keep coming back to the thread to have a go at me

Animation - give over. It will not do her any harm to see the reaction of her doing.

She is not going to be traumitised cause some bloke looked anger and said "Oy stop that".

caram3l, yes I told her kicking was wrong and she apologised. He continued to tell everyone how raising his voice was justified. I think he is an arse and I won't be socialising with him anymore.

Fm, I'm not 'going for you'. I am responding to you. You don't like being disagreed with.

So this man shouted "Oi! Stop it!".

Shouted, yes? Like, really shouted? Enough to make diners across the other side of the cafe jump and quickly turn their heads to find out what the fuss was about?

TotallyLovely - at the begging the Op said she did not like anyone else telling her own daughter off. then she changed her ming half way through.

FM, I'm on my lunchbreak, fyi and this is addictive despite it being rather silly too.

NO - this girl did NOT deserve this arsehole snapping at her with his bloody ANGRY face for her 'crime'.

I wouldn't socialise with him again - and it sounds to me like his wife's a bit of a door mat and needs to take him in hand if he's no patience with kids!

But cherry you haven't answered any of my questions.

And I think, since most of the posters here have said the same as me, that YABU, it's not me has a problem with being disagreed with.

LOL at cherry saying someone else doesn't like being disagreed with!
This man could have done you a favour. Your could have learned that kicking people will piss them off but instead she's learned that she can cry to mummy and she'll take her side. Good luck to you for the future!

And it doesn't matter HOW loud he shouted - he was clearly angry and humiliated the kid.

FM - What questions?

Your dd that should say.

I wonder what could have angered him? It's as if someone was repeatedly kicking him in the leg or something!

FUCKMEPINK

I consider myself the voice of reason!

DandyLioness.. Tsk tsk..

Animation - you remind me of the man in "Men who stare at goats".