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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

ANYONE WHO CLAIMS ANY BENEFIT EVER FOR ANY REASON WHATSOEVER IS A CUNT

400 replies

Hullygully · 15/06/2011 15:36

Just so we're clear.

If we can all just agree on that, perhaps there would be no need for all these poor concerned posters to keep fretting about it.

OP posts:
xstitch · 15/06/2011 17:25

Oh I thought it was any benefits, is it just JSA then and not CTC?. Have I been accidently commiting fraud by goat Shock

RunAwayWife · 15/06/2011 17:26

I think it is any benefits so we might be ok,
Do goats eat Krave???

LineRunner · 15/06/2011 17:26

Krave is provided by goat-infested breakfast clubs.

FoofffyShmoofffer · 15/06/2011 17:29

I haven't read the entire fucking thread but I class this as my first cunt - albeit a group cunt but still Grin < proud>

allhailtheaubergine · 15/06/2011 17:30

My goat's kids went on Jezza to demand a paternity test.

Cunting goats.

slightlymad72 · 15/06/2011 17:33

My goat has started snorting Fruit Shoots and rubbing himself with Greggs Pasties (apparently they smell to good to just eat) anyone know I can stop him before I get reported to Goat Social Services

TheLadyEvenstar · 15/06/2011 17:37

Are we allowed a pair of decent shoes?

I have a handbag as well do I get a goat now?

xstitch · 15/06/2011 17:37

Oh good I can keep the goat then.

Goats eat anything don't they?

They gave you a solvent addicted goat?. I would complain.

Awomancalledhorse · 15/06/2011 17:41

A solvent addicted goat counts towards more benefits. And a badger, I wouldn't complain. Badgers keep baliffs away.

Honeydragon · 15/06/2011 17:42

You have to invest your goat for your children

I have 20,000 goats on a yacht in Monaco, I've been knicking bags of clothing from Wifeys house to feed them.

I am GOAT FRAUD CUNT

Honeydragon · 15/06/2011 17:43

knicking ? Wtf Wtf Wtf???????????

LineRunner · 15/06/2011 17:46

Goats mean prizes.

xstitch · 15/06/2011 17:50

Can I borrow someones badger please?. I could do with chasing away the bailiffs.

TheLadyEvenstar · 15/06/2011 17:52

I have a badger you can borrow

Awomancalledhorse · 15/06/2011 17:54

My beaver gets around town. It's how I got so many goats Blush

xstitch · 15/06/2011 17:55

Thank you TLE.

BearBehavingBadly · 15/06/2011 18:01

I did but all I got was a claim form for lighter fuel benefit. Its 40 pages long & difficult to understand the questions such as:

How many goats under the age of sixteen live in your house?

How many goats live in your street?

If its half past two in the afternoon on a Thursday then does your goat have either a addiction, mental illness or sleep with Ryan Giggs?

Am in tears......

aliceliddell · 15/06/2011 18:01

The goat threads are breeding! They're Furrin scroungers! Stop them before they kill again!
Anyone tried Crispy goat in a Krave sauce?

BearBehavingBadly · 15/06/2011 18:02

Is it like Peking Duck?

TheLadyEvenstar · 15/06/2011 18:04

I prefer Goat Pie nice with a badger sauce

veritythebrave · 15/06/2011 18:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BelleDameSansMerci · 15/06/2011 18:34

Why can't I have a yak?

TheLadyEvenstar · 15/06/2011 18:38

Belle if you are having a Yak why can't I have one too?

TheLadyEvenstar · 15/06/2011 18:38

or a Llama?

BelleDameSansMerci · 15/06/2011 18:39

You'll be wanting an alpaca next...

Is there no end to this sense of entitlement? Grin