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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Am I being unreasoble in thinking this is descrimination against parents?

91 replies

CarmenJ · 14/06/2011 15:10

Hi Mums,

Cosmo in Croydon are discriminating against people with small children and I don?t see why in 2011, England, they are being allowed to get away with it! My niece was invited to a Birthday meal with her friends. She has a toddler and has been told that she has to pay for him to have a separate meal whether he eats it or not. He is not allowed to eat from her plate, or not eat Cosmo's food at all. Well they might as well be saying to parents stay away with your children (especially those with more than one child)! My niece has been told if she doesn?t pay her group will not be seated.

In the current financial climate I think parents have enough to pay for without being forced to pay for something they don?t need. Can anyone tell me how this discrimination is possible in the UK in this day and age?

OP posts:

GeekCool · 14/06/2011 15:12

Sorry but YABU, it's their restaurant/bar and they have every right to expect food to be bought. It's not discrimmination.

create · 14/06/2011 15:14

YABU. They're not discriminating. They're saying they don't want people there who aren't buying a meal.

nenevomito · 14/06/2011 15:15

Well, it would put me off from eating there if I had to buy my 17mo a full meal as she doesn't eat that much, but they're not being unreasonable to have that policy. Its their choice.

MissPenteuth · 14/06/2011 15:16

I think it depends on the age of the child, and whether the restaurant has a children's menu. They can't expect parents to pay for an adult's portion of food for a 1yo, for example. By the age of 18mo-2yrs I'd expect most children to be able to eat something off the menu in most restaurants though, if they do children's portions.

LaurieFairyCake · 14/06/2011 15:16

A child of 3 will take up a chair and a meal should be ordered for it.

It's not much different than paying for airline tickets - or do you think they should travel free too when they're taking a seat?

TotalChaos · 14/06/2011 15:16

Yabu, it's irritating, but nope, they don't have to allow children in at all.

MissPenteuth · 14/06/2011 15:18

Should add however, as others have said, it's their restaurant and their choice what policies they uphold.

SheCutOffTheirTails · 14/06/2011 15:19

I think it's a shit policy and I would just change the booking.

I'm not sure it's really discriminating against parents, it's just taking a gamble that a very child-unfriendly policy won't hurt their business.

GooGooGadget · 14/06/2011 15:20

would they allow an adult to occupy a table without buying a meal? Then it is not discriminatory.

They are being arseholish about it, and I'd be pissed off too, but that is their lookout. I'd not even mention a very small child when booking.

Bucharest · 14/06/2011 15:36

Don't blame them. Nothing worse than trying to have a meal out while toddler-next-door is sputting his dinner everywhere.

I imagine they get more customers than ever.

Original poster

CarmenJ · 14/06/2011 15:44

I think you're all correct especially where you say they'll get more business than ever. There are loads of people who think children shouldn't be seen or heard. I just think it's disgraceful.

OP posts:

Debs75 · 14/06/2011 15:52

So what if you are an adult who wants to enjoy a family meal but doesn't want to eat?
When my dsis was verging on aneorexia she went out for a few meals with her then bf and just drank water.

What if you are eating at a time when your toddler doesn't normally eat so a meal would be wasted on them.
And to say they can't eat from your plate is a bit over the top. I BLW bothe my younger 2 and they often share my plate.

If Pizza Hut don't mind toddlers sharing your food then good enough for me

Nixea · 14/06/2011 16:02

I wouldn't have even batted an eyelid tbh. So what if one restaurant has a policy which is a little child-unfriendly? And even then they're not saying that kids aren't welcome - just that they have to eat the food cooked there rather than a packed lunch.

There are many, many options for eating with kids including some lovely restaurants so where's the harm in having one that caters more for couples and adult groups? If I've paid for a babysitter for the evening then I actually actively seek out places that are NOT child friendly for a peaceful evening.

Plenty of options for all concerned so I can't see the need to get all worked up about it.

TransatlanticCityGirl · 14/06/2011 16:08

I wouldn't call this discrimination. As others say, it's their policy and their right to enforce it.

But I wouldn't eat there...

GetOrf · 14/06/2011 16:11

I agree with Bucharest - perhaps they do not want to cater for families. Or have tables full of children eating from their parent's plate.

OP there is enough discrimination in teh world without you imagining some.

cookcleanerchaufferetc · 14/06/2011 16:13

It is a buffet style restaurant, isn't it? Why should they allow kid(s) to eat their parents food, which is unlimited, for free? They charge children's prices also. YABU. If you don't like it then go elsewhere.

GetOrf · 14/06/2011 16:13

debs - with respect, restaurants cannot be expected to cater for anorexics.

They are there to make a profit, not to provide a social service. If you do not want to eat, don't go out for a meal.

Original poster

CarmenJ · 14/06/2011 16:15

Imagining? Hah - I work in a field where I receive the complaints people make about children. Sorry GetOrf I can assure you there's nothing left to the imagination.

OP posts:

exoticfruits · 14/06/2011 16:16

They don't want DCs-they are being discouraging. Fit in or go elsewhere.
They are a business and are not bothered-they get far more people who don't want children in. It is chicken and egg-if all children were well behaved there wouldn't be a problem.

SheCutOffTheirTails · 14/06/2011 16:19

I don't think you quite grasp the "which came first, the chicken or the egg?" question, exotic

GetOrf · 14/06/2011 16:19

There are plenty of child freindly places to go - go there.

Some people want to go out to eat without shrieking children and balloons everywhere.

Perhaps parents of older children who have endured family friendly restaurant hell and don't want or need to be reminded.

GetOrf · 14/06/2011 16:20

85 posts before someone says 'oh but they do it so differently in Italy, the restaurant owner looked after my baby all night, they were so welcoming to families on the continent' yawn

OddBoots · 14/06/2011 16:21

It's a buffet, do you really expect them to let people share a plate at an all-you-can-eat place?

exoticfruits · 14/06/2011 16:22

No probably a silly one! Not quite what I meant. I know that some people ban or discourage DCs because the parent doesn't make them sit still and quiet. So chicken and egg doesn't fit-but some parents spoil it for all by letting them run around.

Original poster

CarmenJ · 14/06/2011 16:22

Getorf you are funny. It's true some people don't want to eat with children nearby. I'm just aamazed they can get away with it. Look at mens clubs being forced to let in women. Some might have argued they wanted to eat without shrieking children and boobs everywhere.

OP posts:

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