to think that asking a visitor to take of their shoes in my house, is an OK thing to do

[fluffybutt]

I don't have many rules at home, just shoes on if outside and off if you are inside. Just had a friend and her DCs over, and asked them if they would mind taking their shoes off - well apparently thats really rude and made my visitors feel uncomfortable. FFS, it's not like I asked them to walk through an antiseptic food bath or anything.

We wear shoes in the house unless they are muddy or whatever, or unless we fancy being barefoot. I think it's rather naff to take your shoes off at the front door, very pencil up the arse middle class, although I am happy to oblige if other people ask me to.

In terms of hygiene, we have a Vax and that sorts the problem out.

www.thefirstpost.co.uk/assets/library/101125picoftheday--129067953971226900.jpg

Talking about class!

I'm now feeling quite chuffed that people might think I'm common for preferring shoes off inside the house. It's me working class roots coming out at last, see?

I always ask children, but never adults. That said, most adults seem to notice that the children and I have taken ours off and do so too.

If an adult comes with children I do say to the children "Could you take your shoes off indoors please." and then say to the adult "It is a rule for children, doesn't apply to you really". But as I say - I think every adult we have had visiting has taken their shoes off too.

Also - I can understand people feeling uncomforatable being asked to take their shoes off if they were not expecting it. Maybe they have very holey socks, or something....

Oh, I think it's OK if you have wooden floors that are easily damaged by stiletto heels. But you are only allowed to ask people actually wearing stiletto heels. (If I ran the world etc.)

My MIL's parquet flooring still bears the scars of dh's first girlfriend, more than 25 years ago...

Would be interesting to do a survey on how often people are ill in shoes on/off households. I suspect the immune systems of those with "shoes on" are better and they're not ill any more often!

"It's the thought of all those disgusting germs"

does anyone wear shoes in bed? a serious question, as i would have said nobody does, but if people are wearing them inside their living rooms on a relaxing evening, now i'm wondering...

Germs don't matter - you aren't licking the floor for heaven's sake! And even if small children do they are just building up healthy immune systems.

Cleanest place in most houses is the loo as people clean it regularly with products that contain bleach. But you wouldn't want to eat off it, would you? So in that context it's ridiculous to be that worried about germs you panic about shoes on carpets.

Well I lay on the bed with my shoes still on. Does that count?

I dispute that shoes off/on is about class, not that I care, because the whole issue of "class" is rather alien to me. In my country it is just not done, it is considered rude and everyone respects this rule. I am happy to have shoes on or off in other houses but I prefer people taking their shoes off in mine. There is dog poo and chewing gum dropped on public roads and gravel on our drive that can not be taken out by wiping the feet on door mats.

To those who disagree a quick question - someone has mentioned smoking inside houses upthread - spot on comparison!! It is absolutely acceptable in my country to smoke indoors, would you like me to light on in your house should I wish to or would you like to reserve the right to point out the outside place where I can go? How would you react if I was offended and called you rude behind your backs? (I don't smoke btw, but did up until 10 years ago)...

The question is to those who can also imagine themselves to be "non-smokers" otherwise it does not count!!

Thank you Edam for these lovely images

It just doesn't happen to me in RL , people wear clean shoes to visit, wipe them before stepping through the door and are not asked to take them off, it is only on MN that you realise that Hyacinth Bucket isn't a joke! (Probably the same people who start threads about 'dirty strangers touching my baby,' when a harmless old lady wants to stroke a foot.)

yanbu. I hate shoes in the house but I would never ask someone to take there shoes off either.

I never wear shoes in my house but it's my house. I don't ask that guests take shoes off in my house.

I think if you insist on no shoes then your house should be very clean for your guests. I'd forgotten about this but I once visited a client's house (i'm a lawyer) and they insisted my boots came off at the door. I was but she was insistent and I had to take my boots off at the front door, outside the house and she offered slippers to wear. BOAK! Slippers of theirs that had been worn! I politely declied and said i ws fine to walk around in my tights. She said no one, not guests, nor anyone was to wear shoes in their house and they did this to everyone. I don't know why they bothered. The house was filthy. Dingy old carpets, the kitchen was medieval with broken units and the crockery needed a good bleaching. Then there was the bathroom. The floor was filthy and there were piss stains all round the toilet on the floor. FOR FUCK SAKE! I felt quite disgusted having to take my shoes off and walk on those floors.

Please be aware that if you insist that your guests take their shoes off, they will be careful where they're stepping and looking at the floors. Please make sure they're clean.

YANBU
I don't insist myself, but I understand perfectly that other people prefer visitors to remove their shoes (eg, newly mobile baby in the house, easily scratched wooden flooring, etc)

While common in some countaries - wearing your shoes in the house is horribly bad manners where I come from. Studies have shown that the bottom of peoples shoes are dirtier then the worst toilet seat. So IMO wearing your shoes into someones house is equivalent of spitting on someones floor. Disgusting IMO.

That being said - if your a professional visiting a house and its obviously disgusting already....that would be the exception (I'm sure your house isn't like that though OP).

A this is horrible. My house is normally very clean and on a few occasions when it was not (house moving or renovation or I cannot remember now what else, but I am sure there were other incidences) I would insist people kept their shoes on.

"countries"...I wish we could edit our own posts

No your not rude its room to assume you can walk around with your outdoor-shoes indoors yuck

I have a big sign in my all way please remove your shoes thank you.

In my culture its dirty my husband on the other hand took a good while to get used to it he's Irish and they don't remove their shoes

I wear my slippers in my house which have never been outside and are washed regularly anyway.

When you ask people to take their shoes off they have to walk around in tights or socks. I once stood in a spillage of water that was on the kitchen floor at a friends house (another shoes off insister, even before your coat is off) and I then had to keep those wet socks on as I couldnt' change them and then put those wet socks back into my own shoes and make them wet too. If you're going to insist that guests walk around in socks / tights, perhaps warn them in advance so they can bring their own slippers.

I insist on people wearing their shoes in my house.
I don't want stinky feet all over my shag pile.

Some of you are really weird. "some shit on the floor doesn't matter, it will build up the immune system." dear God, I should start a new thread asking if It's unreasonable to suspect many British people have no idea about basic hygiene - we can start with carpets in bathrooms (yuck), not brushing teeth at least twice a day (double yuck), and the most cavalier approach I have seen in any country for proper storage of raw food (turns my stomach). You may want to live like it's the 18th century but don't tell me it's cultural relativism, it is either lack of awareness or an active desire to live in filth.