to think that asking a visitor to take of their shoes in my house, is an OK thing to do

[fluffybutt]

I don't have many rules at home, just shoes on if outside and off if you are inside. Just had a friend and her DCs over, and asked them if they would mind taking their shoes off - well apparently thats really rude and made my visitors feel uncomfortable. FFS, it's not like I asked them to walk through an antiseptic food bath or anything.

OP - they should take them off, unless they are muslims/arabs/thais etc.
For if you offend them (for example by putting your feet on a table facing them) they may throw them at you. And that could be painful.

What's the betting some absolute fing ignoramus is now going to shout "racist" - try and find out a little about cultures different to your own before you go down the fascist route.

I like my hovel I'll have you know

'To those who disagree a quick question - someone has mentioned smoking inside houses upthread - spot on comparison!! '

How so, does second-hand shoe-wearing indoors cause cancer?

How so, does second-hand shoe-wearing indoors cause cancer?

I love it

It is a leading cause of having shit smeared all over your floors. Not sure about the cancer connection but I suspect most medical professionals would see a health issue.

Nice try expat , but I don't think second-hand smoking of one of mine (hypothetical!) ciggie will send you to the hospital. You walking (accidentally of course!) through some shit and leaving it on the floor where my baby crawls might do just that.

I suspect most medical professionals, being in possession of a brain, have far greater concerns than how often one cleans his/her floors, which are generally not used as dining tables.

Do you think it is well fought off A?

I would hate to be asked this. I wipe my feet when I go into a house and wear shoes in my own house and its fine.

Its a bit precious IMO

'try expat , but I don't think second-hand smoking of one of mine (hypothetical!) ciggie will send you to the hospital. You walking (accidentally of course!) through some shit and leaving it on the floor where my baby crawls might do just that.'

Nice try? Plenty of people on here would have their asthma set off by second-hand smoke from just one person's cigarette in their homes, whereas a floor can be mopped, hoovered or even washed with a carpet washer.

It's a senseless juxtaposition.

Do you wash your hands after you went to the loo kids? Or is it also precious? Many people don't.

I happen to know kids licks her hands clean after a visit to the bog, thus strengthening her immune system AND conserving water at the same time.

Fluffybutt - Twister at dinner party: cool! Will try that one out next time the conversation topics are too depressing, eg war, crime, job losses, etc. Of course it'll be at someone's home where shoes are not worn indoors, ha ha.

bemy I do wash my hands after I use the toilet. I think thats slightly differnent than being asked to take your shoes off.

I hate feet. Really hate feet and find it uncomfortable to be in the same room as bare feet (yes I know its weird).

If someones shoes are dirty fair enough but to ask everyone to remove their shoes is a bit much.

So expat according to you smoking is not ok, especially when the host asks due to potential asthma attack or just because they don't like their furniture stinking of the cigarette smoke, but ignoring and belittling a request of the host with clean floors (node to you A) because they find it offensive for cultural reason or because their baby's immune system is vulnerable and they do not want to set off a nasty bug infection is perfectly OK.

I get it.

Do you think it is well fought off A?

What do you mean? Not sure what you're asking?

A x

at expat
kids but to me your refusal to remove your outdoor shoes is the same as your (hypothetical) refusal to wash hands after visiting the facilities... i don't like that and in my home i hope people respect that

hell, walk around in boots, trainer and whatever else you wish. i will just think that you are rude and thoughtless.

Well, anyone with Japanese heritage / experience would say YANBU. How is it precious to follow the way you were brought up? Shoes off at home and school (though we had special shoes at school, not bare feet, and special slippers at home which I always hated and lost as soon as no-one was looking...). I quite like the whole ritual we had there of moving between the inside and outside zones.

I had someone insist I was being rude asking once. I was in a rented house with white shag pile carpet (ick!!) which I had to keep white. I don't see why I should lose my deposit because some rude oaf put holey socks on that day.

That said, I don't actually ask people any more. They usually notice we are all bare foot and comply and I try to not mind when they don't. When in Rome and all that.....

God as a newbie to all this I didnt realise how much people can get hett up about shoes! :o

I didnt say Id refuse to take my shoes off - I said I would hate to be asked (and I would hate to be asked) but I would do it without complaint as it was the home owners request.

When I said I thought it was precious I was thinking of people who are super house proud (notably a great aunt who we hated visiting as we felt guilty for even sitting on her cushions and she insisted on everyone removing their shoes and resulted in very awkward visits)

If its a matter or heritage and tradtition then I suppose thats different

You're all weird. If you have weird disgusting feet, sort it out, that's your problem. If you don't have socks, by some and stop complaining.

People are going on as though the OP is asking them to say a prayer before they enter the house, it's just taking shoes off. I tend to do that automatically with most peoples houses. If you see your host has a shoe rack / spot to put shoes in the hallway, hows about you get a clue and take them off automatically? Totally inconsiderate.

OP, you're not out of line and I'd happily take my shoes off to have a cup of tea round yours. Cheers.

I really dislike other people's feet and socks, so I'd rather people kept their shoes on at my house. Feet, socks and belly buttons, hate them all.

it is time for me to jump off this thread, it is getting repetitive and boring

kid i am not "hett up", i am just not english (scottish/welsh/irish), i mentioned it before. i said in my country it is not normal to walk around the house in outdoor shoes and when i ask to respect this i hope (don't insist, just hope) that visitors will do just that. i am not "house proud". i wash floors twice a week to take the dust and pet hairs off and i do not do anything with my cushions. i don't think it is a class issue as i don't care for class.

i just don't like outdoor shoes in the house, it is the way i was brought up and it is just what i am.

xxx

YANBU - Your house, your rules. Tell them to not bother next time, rude twits.
Unless they want to pay for your replacement carpet, of course ;)

orbinater your post is the magic number!

:o Bemy, not english either (scottish/irish) just goes to show its how your brought up :)

We where always a shoes on house and I bet you lived over the road happily with your shoes off :)

x