to think that asking a visitor to take of their shoes in my house, is an OK thing to do

[fluffybutt]

I don't have many rules at home, just shoes on if outside and off if you are inside. Just had a friend and her DCs over, and asked them if they would mind taking their shoes off - well apparently thats really rude and made my visitors feel uncomfortable. FFS, it's not like I asked them to walk through an antiseptic food bath or anything.

Of course not Mrs C, because one would presume said guests had arrived by chauffeured car and said chauffeur would carry ones guest to the house.

I used to take mine of automatically without thinking.Now I enver take them of but mind thats becuase I do not walk .But must admit I feel bad about my wheelchair wheels and someones house

Fluffy, YANBU. I suspect if your guest was the sort to be offended by your request, you wouldn't really want them around again at any rate. And they were rude not to ask your preference in the first place.

Of course Fluffy - how remiss of me to forget that fact

If you have a gravel carriage sweep its awful for wooden floors

I would never dream of asking guests to take their shoes off. For one thing, it ruins the look of many an outfit (e.g. if you are wearing heels with long trousers to account for the heel length). My closest friend is Indian and expects guests to take their shoes off so I comply (but I don't like, especially as I know she used to have verrucas). She insists on taking her shoes off at my house, however many times I tell her not to.

I only have one non-Asian friend who asks people to take their shoes off, and I find it a bit like those people in my grandparents' generation who used to leave the plastic covers on chairs to protect them, i.e. I look down on them for it. Sorry, but I do. It's not a cultural thing, so I just find it a bit rude.

Thats why you put large patterned Turkish rugs over them whiteglovestest

It depends on the weather... if it's been raining, then yes, shows off. And the occasion. Evening dinner party, no... if they ask if you'd prefer it I say 'yes'. Others then generally follow suit. Many friends have this policy in their homes.

I am a CM so during the week we have a NO Shoes Policy in the house... so many kids and parents in and out... babies crawl on those floors, and put everything into their mouth... so it's a health and safety issue. I once had a mother bring a dead bee in on her stiletto!

i automatically take my shoes off when going indoors so would expect others to do the same.
Not rude to ask in my opinion but does feel awkward sometimes.

We have many friends with babies who crawl around barefoot on the carpeted floor in their homes, and we live in an area near countryside, horses, sheep (and hence animal poo, etc)....it is the expected thing to ask about taking your shoes off if you enter anyone's home, and nobody thinks twice about doing it if asked. However in London lots of people didn't do it in their own homes and were quite perturbed if asked to do so - at the end of the day, if they can't or won't do it, well, you just have to agree to meet outside. We used to tell tradesmen about it before they came (eg plumbers), and if they weren't happy, we'd lay out newspaper instead. It used to be thought of as an "Asian" or "Oriental" practice but now as many people are busy and nobody particularly welcomes an extra round of hoovering to do, I think it's only reasonable to ask. If people are worried about bare feet on floors, wear an outfit that goes with socks or thick tights - otherwise, meet elsewhere.

It is a bit a class thing, sometimes...

Ever seen pictures of anyone at Buckingham Palace with no shoes on?

Ever seen the Queen padding around in stocking feet when she visits a private premises because someone has asked her to remove her shoes?

The queen can afford to have her carpets professionally cleaned and replaced as often as she needs to.
I know I certainly can't.

I have cream carpets in the sitting room. They do not get dirty from normal outdoor shoe wear (someone traipsing in in muddy boots would dirty them of course).

And as for kids sitting on the "dirty" floor where outside shoes have been, do these kids never go to the park, put their grubby little paws in their mouths after touching the swings & slides? A bit of dirt is a good thing. I grew up in an uber clean household and get ill every time I go south of Dover. I am sure the clean childhood and a lot to do with it.

The queen takes off her shoes if her hosts do. Now that's manners. And she sensibly packs extra socks.

Bit surprised at the discussions about being common - if a family can only afford a small house or flat that children have to play barefoot in or babies have to crawl about in, surely refusing to take shoes off or moaning about whether your socks smell or not is itself being common.
The whole point about being classy is in your character and how you behave, not whether you only associate with people who are rich or live like they are aspiring to be rich. I do realise that some people are talking about social class and not about being classy, which are two different things, but I'd rather be classy and poor than noble/rich/royal and narrow-minded.
You're there to spend quality time with the person and not judge how many rooms they can afford, or whether their piano is wrapped in plastic or not - if they want to wrap their piano, it's THEIR piano, not yours. Anyway, if you don't put smelly feet right next to your friends' faces, I doubt very much anyone will notice the smell or lack thereof...
People don't take their shoes off in Buckingham Palace photos because it is a work occasion even if she's showing people around her "home". But I think there was once an interview where Diana, William and Harry were described as being barefoot in their bedrooms - I can't quote the article as it was ages ago - but that's in a private setting. Sometimes also, if people let you come into their home where they are barefoot, it is a sign of trust/intimacy and I think criticising them is a sign that you don't respect the trust they've shown you.
I have been to many parties and dinner parties where guests took off their Manolos and Jimmy Choos, and Church's, and never made a fuss (and all owners went home with the right shoes).

'wear an outfit that goes with socks or thick tights - otherwise, meet elsewhere.'

Or ditch rude excuses for friends.

It's common and ungracious.

We do have large patterned rugs in the main rooms but I do hate runners so the entry hall is susceptible to heel marks

There's nothing classy about being an ungracious host and putting your carpets (or effort to clean them) above the comfort of your guests.

I recently visited the grosvenor estate and we took our shoes off. we had been in the garden though.

South you're equating common with poor, and not common with rich. Cardinal error, there! If picturing someone who was likely to ask me to take off my shoes, I'd immediately think Farrow and Ball and cream carpets that they told everyone they were buying six months in advance and fretting about being seen to shop at Waitrose.

There's nothing classy about being an ungracious guest who walks all over their host's wishes.

I would never ask my vistors to remove their shoes, nor do I value my rugs or floor above them but do feel every so pleased when someone has been courteous enough to offer. It goes both ways. To offer implies a respect for my home.

I take my shoes off in my house, I'd rather not risk walking dirt and worse into my house, I'm not precious about the flooring but we do have some nice rugs which I'd prefer to keep clean. There's 5 of us so potentially a lot of crap to come in on shoes, plus a lot of unsurfaced paths etc that DP and DSS use to walk the dog, plus a 4 yr old who isn't going to notice if the shoes are dirty or not.
Plus, I like the sensation of being barefoot and like having my shoes off.
I wouldn't insist on someone taking off their shoes in my house, but I'd always follow the lead of someone else in their house as to shoes on or off and I'd hope my guests would be equally mannered.

'There's nothing classy about being an ungracious guest who walks all over their host's wishes.'

That's why on nearly every one of these threads everyone says they complied with the hosts' wishes or elected not to go to the person's home.