to think that women with spanking fetishes and suchlike should be ashamed of themselves?

[saidthespiderwithahorridsmile]

ditto being tied up, rape fantasies etc

what sort of message does this sort of "fantasy" send to the male of the species? That really, deep down, women want to be dominated? That physical control is sexy?

Honestly. Women who indulge in this sort of twisted self-hatred need therapy. And to grow up.

I find it quite offensive to be told I am twisted, childish and immature because I know what i like.

I would challenge that you are the one attempting to opress womens sexuality and sexual freedom. You are the one telling women that they must supress sexual desires and toe the party line.

Whilst i take your point that there may be some men who are immature and incapable of realising that whilst some women get a sexual kick from coonsenting trusting Sub/dom relationships, it does not mean that all women like getting a good kicking.
But that really is the fault of the man who owns those thoughts, not the women who enjoy being spanked.

BooyHoo, I think I love you

and

OP, so does your dh enjoy it up the arse or do you not let him as it wouldn't be right

i think spider has just read a thick book, and wants to show off

Totally agree with Mamazon

as I often do

Is it ok for me to be tied up and spanked by a woman?

arf, oldmac I think you might be right...

I also think this may have fared better as a "Feminism/Women's Rights" thread...

saidthespider You see I don't feel corrupted and traumatised by the media I have grown up in . Should I ?

I do know that some media images are done in such a way that it won't make me feel good about myself but tbh because I was lucky enough to be given the tools to have confidence in the way I was I really don't think it affects me .

There are many complicated reasons why this could be a bad way for some women to get/give their kicks but for many more it is just a harmless fantasy that will definetly not give their husbands the idea they can turn up at work on a monday morning and abuse their female co workers .

my dp has never requested it up the arse - I will report back to MN should the matter arise

sorry you feel offended Mamazon and I can see why you would - but I think it is a valid opinion I am expressing and a good topic for discussion. I am not trying to silence anyone.

a 'thick' book or a book that is of a large depth

" I would challenge that you are the one attempting to opress womens sexuality and sexual freedom. You are the one telling women that they must supress sexual desires and toe the party line. "

Mamaz0n I agree completely. Pre-kids when we had a fun sex life dh and I indulged in a little light bondage, even when tied up there was no doubt that I was still completely in charge . It was my choice.

From stereotypes at least. The men who like a damn good spanking tend to come from a public school background.... where I'd guess spanking and bullying went on a fair amount from what I've heard.

And dh knows if he ever actually tried to "control" me (for real) he would bet a swift kick in the balls

do you know whether he would be up for it or not? as in do you know each other completely

returning to the point about maybe we (those who emjoy a little sub play) aren't in the wrong, maybe you are totally inaware of your sexuality

which cannot be our fault

lol ferret
yes its all about excitement

what excites you at that particular time in your life. and that DOES change.
lord knows why it changes, poss something to do with taboos
who knows

but its not tied to the marxist/lenninist theory of the subjugated theory of the suppressed proletariat

or whatever book she swallowed

Gster and everything you read in the Daily Fail is true...

honest!!!

Gster I agree with that

and I am surprised that my comment about children sexualising this sort of violence as a self-protective mechanism met with disgust. I thought that was pretty uncontroversial. Of course regular brutal beatings during childhood can interrupt sexual development. I suppose I am suggesting that this is what has happened to women on a wider scale - we have internalised and fetishised the domination and violence we have experienced as a group. Or something.

Please carry on disagreeing, I am reading with great interest and respecting the opinions of others.

"what excites you at that particular time in your life. and that DOES change"

OldMac who told you about my crush on Chesney Hawkes?

I love a bit of sexual domination

Yabu

trinity you may display your love via use of a paddle and handcuffs

So, women who enjoy dominating their partners in the bedroom objectify themselves as punitive mother figures and women who enjoy spanky are twisted, immature, damaging to society and in need of help.

OP I think you have problems with non-vanilla sex and in particular problems with women's sexuality as based on your own posts, women are at fault whatever they do. Perhaps you should spend a little time with a therapist exploring why you have such strong negative feelings about women and sex.

so only women who have suffered abuse like to be dominated??

what bollocks....

ALL men who like to be dominated are public schoolboys? Are we really going here??

if the OP's husband has to make do with plain old vanilla everytime, maybe he DOES like being rogered roughly in the arse with a massive dildo, he's just getting his kicks elsewhere?

Only wondering, like...