to suggest that my sister could cover boobs with a scarf....

[chocolatehobnobs]

Sister has 2 DC 2 and 5 months. I am pg. She reckons she is the world expert on child rearing, never afraid to comment on other's parenting. We went for lunch at the weekend at Wagamama's. Staff were lovely and helpful offered highchair etc sis was vocally demanding a certain table and being a bit precious IMO. We were sitting next to 6 young guys (same table) Sis whips boob out and BF baby. I (and our neigbours who were eating) could see boob, dripping nipple. When she announced loudly that baby had bitten nipple I offered to pass her a scarf to save the boys blushes. She refused and said she was often complimented on being a good role model for BF. AIBU to want to do things differently or is she right?

"What's the big hang up with the word 'whip'? No of course you can't actually whip a breast out but the phrase 'whip it out' is never meant literally."

the issue is taht teh people who use this word in relation to BFing use it to exaggerate the action and imply that it is something far more noticeable that it actually is.

"While I have no problem with people breastfeeding wherever they want to I would have a massive problem with being hit by a squirt of breastmilk, as one poster said they did to a passerby (and didn't seem overly bothered by it either). I can't even imagine the mortification I would feel if I did that to somebody. If my breasts had any tendency towards squirting whatsoever then, sorry, but there's no way I'd have been feeding in public. "

cows' milk, coffee, soup and allsorts of liquids get spilled in restaurants and cafes all the time. they are accidents and nobody intentionally spills them. yes it isn't pleasant but you dont see anyone demanding that those things shouldn't be in the restaurant.

"Babies biting nipples?!?! If it can bite it shouldn't be on there imo!"
based on what logic?

Sorry I'm struggling with internet connectiion cutting out didn't mean to repeat myself.
Takeresponsilbility I agree with you about peace and quiet. That is my issue - not just how people BF and yes 5dollar it is about my sister and her inflicting her views on me.

chocolatehobnobs - your sister does sound like a pita. If this thread had been about the wedding I'd have been totally on your side

yes, other liquids get spilled but not squirted several feet across a cafe (I've NEVER seen anything like this happen btw, can't even imagine it, but that is what the poster explicilty stated that she did on several occasions). Plus no other flying liquid is fresh from a human body. That may be natural for the baby to drink but I would feel pretty sick about having milk from a stranger end up on me.

And the teeth thing is based on no logic just an instinctive 'ouch, no way' response.

so what difference does it make whether it is spilled on you from 6 inches away or 3 feet away? it's still spilt isn't it?

cow's milk is fresh from hundreds of cows' bodies!!

and why would you feel sick? it's only fabric, it can be washed.

I wouldn't particularly want to be squirted with someone's milk either tbh... not the end of the world though and not a good reason to stop someone feeding in public!

Yes, still spilt but somehow the shock factor would be worse if it was from a distance. Don't know why. And I know it can be washed but not there and then, I'd have to get home with it on me. I know it's totally different but my reaction would be the same as if I had vomit, urine, blood or any other bodily fluid on me - bearable from myself or someone I know but horrific from a stranger.

My reaction is likely completely irrational but I would be repulsed to be the victim in that situation and mortified/scarred for life to be the woman who squirted. It's just not a scenario I could bear to risk putting myself or other people into.

'victim'

manicinsomniac - you so clearly have zero experience with breastfeeding.

Babies get their first teeth routinely about 4-6 months of age. You're surely not saying women should stop breastfeeding their babies by then?

Wow! at some of the comments on here.

Surely the one thing that this thread (and practically every other) highlights is that everyone has their own opinion - and that they are entitled to it?

I breastfed in public. Did not particularly want anyone to see my breasts (not because I'm prude / ashamed / insert another adjective), but rather like the way that I would not want to flash my arse cheeks at Joe Public if I could avoid it.

And in my personal situation, I could avoid it quite easily. The first month or two, when it was difficult to get screeching ds into position, bra strap unhooked, mouth positioned, latched on etc, I used the bf rooms (am not in UK, and I was never inconvenienced at having to find/use one).
Later on, when I got the hang of it, I bought a huge cool (I think!) scarf, put it over my shoulders and held it together at the front with one hand while 'manipulating' DS onto breast with the other. He was never smothered or drowned in scarf material at any point and to be honest, all he cared about was getting milk in his gob! Think he might have tried to pull it down a couple of times when he was much older, but I think all that a voyeur might have glimpsed was that back of his head and as much breast as you'd see around it...

Nor did I squirt anyone either - other than ds who had regular breast-milk face-washes.....

Don't see why some posters need to be so insulting though? Each to her own, eh? If you feel comfortable bearing all, great, but please remember that some people might have a lower comfort level than you - that doesn't in itself make them prude. Similarly, if you find it awfully distasteful, I guess you need to find new friends, or at least avoid baby mealtimes with them if it's simply too distressing.

Get a grip people who are afraid of being squirted by breastmilk! Perspective please! I mean, how likely is it to happen to you? Hilarious!

I'm not afraid of it! I was expressing surprise and shock at the story of someone who said their breastmilk squirted regularly, especially as she didn't seem particularly embarrassed or upset that she had squirted someone. I said it would have ruined my day to have been the one squirted and ruined my week (at least - would just have wanted to die of embarrassment) to have been the squirter.

And no, I never considered breastfeeding. But neither of my children had teeth till 8 months so I thought that was the norm. 4-6 months they could surely only have the isolated tooth, not enough to bite with? I have never seen a 4 month old with teeth. But 6 months seems about the right age to stop breastfeeding. It's only in the last few years that we've gone all American and started attaching toddlers to ourselves.

You're very sure of yourself considering you have no experience manic.
Why do you think that 6 months is about the right time to stop?

If it's OK with you, I'll continue to breastfeed my 10month old. Milk is the most important form of nourishment for a baby pre one year of age - why would I give her cow's milk over human milk?

Oh, and they only need 1 tooth to bite. DD only has her two bottom ones, but when she bites it hurts!

6 months - only because that's what my mum told me and when I've asked people how long the general reply is 'a few months or so, it depends really,' which I interpreted to be around 6. I'm not sure of myself, I said it SEEMS about the right age.

5dollarshake, of course it's ok with me?! I didn't say anything about what anybody else should do, I said I never considered breastfeeding and certainly wouldn't do it when they had teeth, not that others shouldn't so as they like.

My ds bit harder with no teeth fwiw.
And I breastfed him till hewas nearly 3

And I'm not American.

You said you never even considered breastfeeding yourself, so to say '6 months seems about the right age to stop' is clearly what you expect from other people.

manic, my Mum told me lots of stuff. But I did lots of reading on the subject to find out more facts and the bigger picture. What is socially normal and what is biologically normal can be very different.

Once you've fed a bigger baby, believe me, 2/3 years old seems the right age.
It's also what is actually recommended by the World Health Organisation.

And you did actually say that you didn't think a baby with teeth should be being breastfeed in an earlier post. Feel free to retract that if you wish, but you did say it.

I still think it's totally rich that someone who never even considered breastfeeding is being so free and easy on what breastfeeders should and shouldn't be doing...

"4-6 months they could surely only have the isolated tooth, not enough to bite with? I have never seen a 4 month old with teeth."

My children were teething by 3 months Insomniac and already had 4 teeth by 5 months. I only breast fed to 6 months but wished I'd done it for a lot lot longer. My ExH wasn't very supportive of me and I gave up too quick, big regret. But I didn't post on mumsnet when my two were babies and didn't have the fantastic support and knowledge available on here.

timewasting, I believe I said babies with teeth shouldn't be on breasts imo. Not that they shouldn't be on there. Why would I expect everyone to have the same opinion as me? Bizarre assumption to make.

and I'm not being 'free and easy' on what breastfeeders should and shouldn't do, I am stating what I would and wouldn't do.

"just as otch likes feeding a 3 year old"

Actually this is misguided thinking. I don't 'like' feeding a near-three year old. At times it's a pain - literally and figuratively, because I'm pregnant and it can be very sensitive. I continuing through pregnancy because I have got this far and its no skin off my nose to tandem feed, which I hope will help my daughter deal with the arrival of her sister.

I've simply not weaned and passively let my child lead. I cannot 'make' my child continue, because I 'like' it or 'need' to continue it.

Oh, and very rarely (ie almost never) does the situation arise where my daughter wants a feed outside the home/bed. But that might change when I'm constantly feeding (I remember feeding 18 hours out of 24 in the early days!) a newborn.

To be fair, before having children I would have nudged and made a 'bitty' comment to my husband, but I wouldn't have been offended and I wouldn't have been 'shocked' or made my feelings clear.

Although I think your thinking about breastfeeding is disordered and therefore your delicate feelings are your own issue to deal with and don't come under the scope of my inconsideration, I also think your sister sounds like a right ache in the backpipe.

Otch............ up to you, but I'm not sure one needs a child to share breasts in order to accept a sibling. My children all have four siblings each, none were tandem fed and they're very very close.

manicinsomniac, of course you're entitled to your own opinion. But when it flies in the face of all the guidance and evidence about bfing (eg World Health Organisation recommends bfing to 2 and beyond, average age worldwide is something like 5 or 6 iirc - bfing experts help me out here please!), it's reasonable to expect your beliefs to be questioned.

If you'd said, I think deepfried mars bars are the best food for my toddler, wouldn't you expect someone to point out that the evidence doesn't support your opinion?

chocolatehobnobs, I still don't understand why you think your sister is 'inflicting her views' on you. Sure, she has a different personality. Your tale if her wedding suggests that she looks up to you (even if she won't admit it) and also maybe that underneath the bravado she's possibly quite insecure. I think you'd do well to stand back from the bfing issue and try to see your sister's personality for what it is, rather than as an affront to your way of doing things.