Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shocked at how many mners seem to condone smacking

780 replies

Cat98 · 03/05/2011 13:47

I am not talking about people who have smacked in anger and post saying "oh no, I lost it and smacked my DC" - everyone makes mistakes and no-one is perfect! I am talking about those who use smacking as a considered, pre meditated form of punishment/discipline. I know this was discussed a lot on another thread a few days ago, and I was pretty much told "each to their own" - but I am genuinely surprised that it seems to be a popular method here?

OP posts:
Jaquelinehyde · 03/05/2011 23:06

Oh Osama I don't know how you dare, the bare faced cheek of it!

razors · 03/05/2011 23:08

I disagree with smacking and am waiting for the day when it is finally banned in this country along with the other forward thinking countries in the world who have banned it already. I would never lay a hand on another human being. Especially a defenceless child.

rachie2011 · 03/05/2011 23:09

alldirections
Bit harsh that would surely make it worse..........
It depends where you were goin surely
if you were going some place nice like Nannans or zoo or park ect i think any child would soon behave if the car was stopped and they were told they will not go if they cannot sit safely
But if it like to school lol where most kids dnt like anyway it would not work lol
In that go i guess her safety comes first if you have tried everything taking away toys not playing outside later ect i would tap her on the hand and say its naughty your going to hurt yourself now please sit nicely etc
And if it doesnt work and you cannot control her Well lol get the bus :)

sickoftheholidays · 03/05/2011 23:09

If I went through and reported all the rude messages, there would be 24 pages of "message deleted by mumsnet" and that would rather spoil the debate.

Arcadie · 03/05/2011 23:09

Hi OP - I was the third poster on here. The one with the biscuit who you thought was being unfair for saying it would kick off?

I admire your high-minded ideals of trying to get reasoned debate on this subject. But it's not going to happen on AIBU...

Mamaz0n · 03/05/2011 23:10

alldirections

Have you considered something like This

sickoftheholidays · 03/05/2011 23:10

you have to admit its been a good thread though Arcadie

osamabinladensmrs · 03/05/2011 23:12

sickoftheholidays

You have not been abusive. Gem has. The rules clearly forbid personal attacks. Calling someone a twat is not acceptable.

rachie2011 · 03/05/2011 23:12

Mamaz0n Hey magic lol they look fab! :)

glitterballmama · 03/05/2011 23:14

Jacqueline and Gorgeous, the fact you are even trying to defend Gemsy tells me all I need to know about you....

FirstVix · 03/05/2011 23:14

To be fair there is no longer any real 'debate'. Lots of abuse from both sides. I don't feel anyone here deserves to be called a bad parent based on what I read before things got hairy.

I personally don't want to ever hit a child. However, I wouldn't necessarily think (as I mentioned earlier) that anyone was abusing a child if I saw a smack being administered. Depends on context etc.

For whoever asked, I was goggling the number of countries that had banned smacking (that point interested me) and came across this.

Not sure how relevant/up-to-date or whatever it is but does give another view.

NickRobinsonsloveslave · 03/05/2011 23:14

I witnessed a bloke giving his DD the deluxe hairdryer treatment on May day. He did that for about 5 whole mins. Everyone was gawping at him completely embarressed and cringing. He NEVER laid a finger on his DD though, so I suppose his treatment was okay, then? As opposed to just giving her a short slap on the bottom then walking on again.

glitterballmama · 03/05/2011 23:16

Sickof, I said that I was revolted by your parenting methods and that your attempts to defend hitting your child gave me the creeps.

Gemsy accused me of having sex with my father.

Rather different, I think?And definitely rather worse than calling someone a twat.

osamabinladensmrs · 03/05/2011 23:16

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

AllDirections · 03/05/2011 23:17

Rachie, it does sound a bit harsh but my DD is very determined. She doesn't usually undo her seat belt but if she decides she doesn't want to do something there is no talking to her at all, even if we're going somewhere nice! On Friday I nearly lost control of the car and I put us all at risk (3 DDs) so when she started on Monday I smacked her leg once and she stopped. I don't usually smack so I think it was the shock that stopped undoing the seat belt again.

I notice that the anti smacking brigade haven't come up with any suggestions!

osamabinladensmrs · 03/05/2011 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

GORGEOUSX · 03/05/2011 23:18

Osama you can stop gloating - I've reported YOU.

glitterballmama · 03/05/2011 23:19

Thanks again osama for reporting her.

Gorgeous, it's amazing that rather than admit Gemsy's posts were out of order, you're choosing to round on someone else! Are you going to report me now?

AllDirections · 03/05/2011 23:19

Thanks for the link MamazOn, I'll definitely look at getting one as we do a fair bit of travelling.

MilaMae · 03/05/2011 23:20

Osama, the gloating post, words fail me Shock

rachie2011 · 03/05/2011 23:21

I thought mumsnet was a place for mums to meet for advice and a chat and i have bin on a few times been called a SH*T stirrer for replaying to a message i thought i could help with got told i was born in the 1950s because i said i saw a different in children who are smacked and those who are not and bad mum for considering to tap my child on the hand to make her understand the cooker is hot and she must not tounch not feeling toooo gr8 about this place at the moment :(

K999 · 03/05/2011 23:21

Ooh, can someone report me please? I've never been reported before....it all sounds rather exciting.....Grin

MilaMae · 03/05/2011 23:22

Alldirections we were advised against those I forget by whom. I think it was due to not being able to get them out quick in an accident.

glitterballmama · 03/05/2011 23:23

Mila, words fail you at osama's post?Not Gemsy's insane rantings?

Mamaz0n · 03/05/2011 23:23

deluxe hairdryer treatment?

I really do hope that Gemsys claim to work in CP was blarney.

I can totally get that people would be defensive over acts that they feel guilty about. But rather than admit that they have lashed out previously and look for advice on alterniatives, they become aggressive and silly. It says a lot.

I have seen a couple of people on this thread elsewhere and withheld judgment, this thread has confirmed prior thoughts though.
I fear the average IQ of MN has dropped significantly upon their arrival