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AIBU?

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Original poster

Fuming and shaking, please hold my hand

149 replies

Saw444 · 24/04/2011 12:47

Will keep it short

Have namechanged as this will get me recognised

Dd (7) was playing with her little friends at the small park next to the house I can't see it from the window but if I walk to the side of the house I can talk to her without shouting it's that close

She ran in with her friend looking frightened a while ago and I asked what wad wrong, turns out that two teenagers had been playing on the bike ramp next to it started talking to the little ones then one of them had pulled down her shorts while the other filmed it

She said her pants "got stuck on her bum" so never came fully down

I ran out the house and seen the boys disappear beyond the park and recognised one of them as the older brother of one of dd,s school mates

He is at least 14

I have been to the door and demanded they get there boy home now and check his mobile, shouted a few things I prob should not have done then came home and dh has called the police who we are waiting on arriving

I am furious, a young child I could understand even though I would still have spoke to the parents but 14!!!!

Dd seems fine, we never made a big deal in front of her, told her she was a good girl for knowing to come in and tell me and she is now watching shrek eating a Easter egg

I don't know what else to do

OP posts:
SkinittingFluffyBunnyBonnets · 24/04/2011 12:50

Police! You know who it was...or at least one of them...they are culpable and they have assaulted her and filmed it!

Oh...just seen DH has called the police...I think the polic will seize his phone....I also think you should tell all the neighbours with kids....incase they let theirs near the little freak.

So sorry dd had ths happen.

Borisismyhousespider · 24/04/2011 12:51

Well you've done the right thing going to see the parents involved and calling the police, as 14 or more the boy is old enough to know that this is wrong and any peer pressure issues need sorting out before something like this goes too far, Good Luck with getting this horrible incident sorted out.

Goblinchild · 24/04/2011 12:52

That's a horrible thing to have happened, and it's understandable that you were enraged and challenged his family. Calling the police is a good idea, they can visit him and lay out the law for him. Hopefully scaring him in the process.
However, now they know what happened and exactly what the DS and his mate did, what's to stop them deleting the evidence and denying all?

ivykaty44 · 24/04/2011 12:52

I hoep your dd is ok Sad

2littlegreenmonkeys · 24/04/2011 12:54

Shock I hope your DD is okay, good on her for knowing to come and tell you right away.

What did they boys parents say, or did they get a word in, I know if I was in your situation I would not have let them get a word in edge ways Blush (not least until I had calmed down anyway.

Glad you rang the police and I hope they are proactive in getting this sorted.

TidyDancer · 24/04/2011 12:54

Oh poor DD. :(

I would've done exactly the same as you, so well done for how you handled it.

Hulababy · 24/04/2011 12:54

Hope your DD is ok.

There is nothing to stop them deleting it, but even if they can't prove anything hopefully a police call will be sufficent to stop them from ever doing anything like this again to another poor child.

And ifthey haven't delted it then hopefully they will be dealt with appropriately by the police and made to see jus how unacceptable their behaviour was.

Original poster
Saw444 · 24/04/2011 13:02

Dh is angry with me that it may be deleted now but I'm so scared that they show it to people or Bluetooth it to others

The thought of them laughing at my little girl Angry

The parents made all the right noises but I got the feeling they thought so what, I could have torn them apart Sad

OP posts:
2littlegreenmonkeys · 24/04/2011 13:06

Angry I hope the boys parents don't sweep this under the carpet, he did wrong and needs to be held accountable. He is 14 years old, he knew it was unacceptable behavior, the parents know and they need to deal with him to make sure he does not do this again.

I am so angry on your DD's behalf, I probably wouldn't have had half the restraint you did when speaking to his parents.

TethersEnd · 24/04/2011 13:08

The boys need to know that this behaviour could see them on the sex offenders register in the future.

This is a sexually motivated assault on a small child.

OP, hope you and DD are ok.

Pancakeflipper · 24/04/2011 13:09

Well done you on not ripping their heads off. What a horrible thing. Glad you have called the police and they will hopefully inform the 14 yr old and parents how serious this is.

LIZS · 24/04/2011 13:12

Nasty, I bet even deleted pictures, and any sharing history, can be "found" . At least she told you.

tyzer2001 · 24/04/2011 13:18

I agree with almost everything that's been said, except for the sentence 'This is a sexually motivated assault on a small child.'.

It could be, yes. But it could equally have been motivated by bullying and intent to humiliate.

Either way it's appalling behaviour and needs dealing with - but it bothers me that people seem to attach a sexual motive to everything .

I hope your DD is ok and that the police are able to deal with the situation effectively.

ruddynorah · 24/04/2011 13:20

they can retrieve deleted images.

Vallhala · 24/04/2011 13:22

Little ....! I hope very much that the Police scare the shit out of them, so much so that they'll never even think of doing the same thing again. I'd imagine that this is exactly what the Police will do too. Hope the parents do it as well.

You've done exactly the right thing - I don't blame you for being furious, I would be too.

I hope your daughter is okay.

princessparty · 24/04/2011 13:28

'This is a sexually motivated assault on a small child.

i doubt it is really sexually motivated but silly bullying and humiliating-yes.

Honeybee79 · 24/04/2011 13:28

Hope your DD is OK. How awful.

This is a serious offence for a 14 year old boy and they could end up on the sex offenders register. I am sure the police and their parents will ensure they're aware of the gravity of this.

beesimo · 24/04/2011 13:35

I know exactly what my DH and my lads would do to the culprit but I better not say as I will be getting called all sorts again.

Suffice to say this does not happen in our neck of the woods simply because no little bastard would dare to do it.

LDNmummy · 24/04/2011 13:42

Unfortunately he and his mates will probably have deleted the pictures before the police arrive as you (obviously out of anger and rightfully so) already confronted his family who will also make him aware of you coming round. Unless they are actually respectable enough to admit their son has done this and show the police the pics themselves.

I hope the police do something about this as it is absolutely disgraceful. What did the boy's family say when you went round?

Mumofaflump · 24/04/2011 13:51

I used to work in a prison and when mobile phones were found they had ways and means of retrieving EVERYTHING that hadeer been on the SIM or in the phones memory. Even if the pics have been deleted they can still be found.

Your poor DD. I hope those lads get the bollocking of a lifetime.

Feenie · 24/04/2011 13:53

beesimo, are you trawling the boards so that you can post repeatedly about your family's particular brand of justice? Hmm

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 24/04/2011 14:03

I would be beyond horrified if I thought any of my boys had done this to another child. Maybe his parents reacted the way they did because they are totally in shock at what their child has done, and maybe once you'd gone they got hold of the phone at once, so he couldn't delete it - that is what I would do. I hope that the police can get hold of the image and deal hard with the little bully.

I'm glad that your dd seems to be OK, and it sounds as if you are handling this absolutely correctly, both with her and calling the police.

{{{{hugs}}}} - for you and for your dd.

RubyGrace17 · 24/04/2011 14:05

Absolutely despicable :( Feel for you OP but it sounds like you're doing all the right things for your dd.

Ruby

AllOverIt · 24/04/2011 14:10

OMG - the little fuckers. Your poor DD [busad] I would have gone mad too. You did the right thing.

I hope the police scare the living crap out of them.

Let us know what the police do.

beesimo · 24/04/2011 14:13

Feenie

No I am not. Are you just trawling the boards to chastise me about my posts?

What I do find strange on MNs net is that somehow, in most parts of the country not obviously 'the backwater' I live in it seems that the out of control teenagers who commit such outrages as abusing little girls, pouring piss on teenage girls making elderly, disavantaged sn kids ect too petrified and distraught to go even so far as the local shops ect must somehow be protected form 'my ilk' while their innocent victims suffer.

The reason the cowardly little bullies are doing it is because they know they can and DO get away with it.