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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unreasonable DH. Divorce on the cards.

164 replies

marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 19:47

I have been craving spaghetti hoops on toast all day. DH rang me on his way home from soft-play to say he was calling in to Aldi to get some loo roll and then to the Co-Op to get some fruit/bread. Was there anything I wanted, he asked? I said yes please, a big tin of spaghetti hoops.

When he gets back, it seems that apparently he didn't telepathically know that I wanted Heinz hoops and not Aldi's own brand hoops. I am most annoyed. Aldi hoops have watery sauce and the hoops are soggy. This is Not Good Enough.

Looking past the fact that he has looked after DS all day and then taken it upon himself to go and get essential supplies, he is being very unreasonable isn't he? I can't be expected to live like this.

OP posts:
GreenEyesandHam · 13/04/2011 22:49

I'm probably just oversensitive QuickLook, I've been through similar to this situation myself and it really hits home you know?

KaraStarbuckThrace · 13/04/2011 22:50

Oh God it is worse, he is a child abuser as well :(
Aldi brand Fruit shoots Shock

Call the police!

QuickLookBusy · 13/04/2011 22:52

Point taken Green. Will think next time, before posting.

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 22:54

Oh they weren't Aldi Froot Shoots. They were the real deal. He just saves the Aldi shite especially for his wife. Hmm

OP posts:
GreenEyesandHam · 13/04/2011 22:55

Cunt

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 22:56

I know, GreenEyes. I know.

OP posts:
goodegg · 13/04/2011 23:04

I think you should show him this thread, to get the gravity of the situation across? He thinks treating you like this is acceptable, he needs to see MN at its hilarious supportive best.

jenga079 · 13/04/2011 23:07

I blame mil. I bet she made him do it.

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 23:09

It definitely stems from MIL.

Dh takes her food shopping every week. She insists on shopping in Sainsbury's but then whines about the price of the branded items because she can get them in Home Bargains for a third of the price.

His family is fucked-up about brands. What did I marry in to?

OP posts:
halfyorkshiremanhalfessexgirl · 13/04/2011 23:24

and now the ingrained family shit starts to unravel... suffer ye the home bargaining MIL

Tee2072 · 14/04/2011 07:25

How are you this morning, marmalade? Did he even attempt to apologize before heading off to bed and, I'm sure, hogging the duvet?

NorksAreMessy · 14/04/2011 07:30

marmalde, have you worked out a way to check his phone, just to see if he has been ORDERING FOOD ONLINE. You might have to be brave, but we are all here to hold your hand.nthe key words to look for are 'delivery slot' and 'no substitutions'. I am sorry if that was hard to read, but I have been where you are :(

spooktrain · 14/04/2011 08:08

Have you been in touch with CAB? or entitled.co.uk? I'm sure they have experience with tinned pasta issues.

Plus I am a little concerned about your DH's Branston bean fixation, would he consider counselling do you think?

feistychickfightingthebull · 14/04/2011 08:09

You have to buy Lundy BAncrofts why does he do this. His behaviour is textbook

spooktrain · 14/04/2011 08:09

I realise things might have got past the counselling stage, apols if insensitive

thumbwitch · 14/04/2011 08:26

y'know, normally I'd be right in there with the "leave the bastard" crew, I would - but OP, do you really think this marriage is unsalvageable? I mean, is there no hope?
I think with some serious product counselling you could possibly start to mend the hideous cracks in your marriage.

Have you spoken to your GP about his Branston addiction? That sounds a bit scary, actually - perhaps that is why you got ownbrand - rather than OW, he is using the spare cash to fund his Branston habit.

I think you have serious ishoos here, but I also think there is a glimmer of hope... but only if he does the washing up.

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 14/04/2011 08:48

Well...

Went upstairs to bed last night, two hours after he went (this is becoming habit) and he was asleep in bed. He was snoring like he does when he lies on his back, so I gently nudged him in the ribs and he turned onto his side facing me and gave me a cuddle. What IS he hiding? Why didn't he just go to the spare room like most men would? Confused

Also, checked the bean supplies this morning. We are one tin down yet we have not eaten beans for dinner. I dread to think what he is up to with those beans :(

OP posts:
Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 14/04/2011 08:50

p.s washing up still there when I got out of bed at 8.30 this morning. He got up at 5.45. He doesn't usually get up until 6. I assumed WRONGLY that he was getting up to do washing-up. But obviously he wanted fifteen minute bean time. I am considering looking through the recycling bin for evidence.

OP posts:
Tee2072 · 14/04/2011 08:53

I do think it's the Branston addiction that is the problem. I wouldn't be worrying about him buying Heinz for the OW but about him spending the Heinz money on Branston! What's next? The HP money on Aldi Brown Sauce?? ::shudder::

Bit0fFunnyBunny · 14/04/2011 09:01

I really can't believe what I'm reading here. What would you all do if the genders were reversed?

Mumsnet at its worst Angry

TandB · 14/04/2011 09:08

Dear all

I've just joined MN and I thought it would be all about being supportive 'cos we is all mums together in one big sisterhood.

I can't believe people are being so mean to the OP, asking her what kind of marmalade she is FFS. You all want to have a good look at yourselves. Hahahaha. LOL!

I don't think this is the forum for me. I am off to join Netmums.

QuickLookBusy · 14/04/2011 09:10

He got up at 5.45 and let you have a lie in?

My DH does this and it drives me f ing mad. Selfish Bastards.

And shut up BitOfFunnyBunny, with your "funnybunny" name. What can you possible know??

QuickLookBusy · 14/04/2011 09:13

And Kungfupannda , the door's that way---->

Close it on your way out

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 14/04/2011 09:15

I'm just so confused at the minute. [lady di face]

Especially since I just opened our cupboard and did a quick stock-take. Mingling with the Branston beans is Asda's own chopped tomatoes, next to Heinz ravioli (for DS) next to Aldi chickpeas, next to Sainsbury's minestrone, next to Napolena passata.

When did I allow my brands to become so messed up? Is it MY FAULT my marriage is in this mess? I have to shoulder some of the blame here.

OP posts:
Bit0fFunnyBunny · 14/04/2011 10:09

Oh, and don't listen to Fellatio- she has her own militant anti-processed condiment agenda here, and tars us all with the same brush. Most of us find it perfectly possible to combine a light-hearted love of canned foodstuffs with being successful, confident sexy women. She is just a joyless fanatic who gives the rest of us a bad name.