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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unreasonable DH. Divorce on the cards.

164 replies

marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 19:47

I have been craving spaghetti hoops on toast all day. DH rang me on his way home from soft-play to say he was calling in to Aldi to get some loo roll and then to the Co-Op to get some fruit/bread. Was there anything I wanted, he asked? I said yes please, a big tin of spaghetti hoops.

When he gets back, it seems that apparently he didn't telepathically know that I wanted Heinz hoops and not Aldi's own brand hoops. I am most annoyed. Aldi hoops have watery sauce and the hoops are soggy. This is Not Good Enough.

Looking past the fact that he has looked after DS all day and then taken it upon himself to go and get essential supplies, he is being very unreasonable isn't he? I can't be expected to live like this.

OP posts:
kaj32 · 13/04/2011 20:54

Forget leaving him, murder is the only option and i doubt a court in the land would convict you

QuickLookBusy · 13/04/2011 21:05

Marmalade, sorry to say this but are you sure he isn't having an affair?

Buying own brand spagetti hoops and fruit shoots in the same day. There is no other explanation.

midnightservant · 13/04/2011 21:08
Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:13

Well, LookBusy, there have been other signals too if I'm honest.

He said that he let DS and his mate eat a DibDab each at soft play. Plus he griped at me for eating one of his birthday Ferrero Rocher's this afternoon...

OP posts:
sobloodystupid · 13/04/2011 21:13

Check his pockets for receipts (or tin openers). I bet he has bought branded hoops for ow and cannot buy you the same as he would be "unfaithful" to or "betraying" the ow. This is a standard script. Next he will "forget" your attitude to Marmite and the jig will be up.
Stay calm. Buy "The Toxic Tin opener/enabler", enlist the support of your friends and family. Do not keep this private, by airing this you are removing the secrecy and double life (Aldi re Heinz) that he is thriving on. Good luck, keep posting

BeatRoute · 13/04/2011 21:16

He's gaslighting you!

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:20

I am sobbing here at the support you ladies are giving me. sobloodystupid you have opened my eyes.

Also, I settled on the sofa to watch Hollyoaks on catch-up, whilst eating my sub-standard hoops and he did this heavy sigh and passively-aggressively asked if he could watch the football but only after I had finished watching whatever it is you're watching on catch-up" :(

OP posts:
BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte · 13/04/2011 21:21

If it's any consolation, my DH did very similar the other evening... he came back from Lidl with an oatmeal rather than granary loaf. The solicitor I spoke to said that it should go through the courts all very smoothly...

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:23

breastmilk I will start us a thread in Relationships tomorrow. We can support each other through this.

OP posts:
QuickLookBusy · 13/04/2011 21:26

Ah love, wish I could come round and give you a big .

Please hang on, there is help out there you know.

Ring Heinz's helpline tomorrow. They are used to helping women like you.

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte · 13/04/2011 21:28

marmalade are you pregnant?

Lovecat · 13/04/2011 21:29

BeatRoute beat me to it, however I think this not only smacks of gaslighting but also a controlling, abusive nature. Why does this man think he can tell you what brand of hoops to eat? The bastard!

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:31

I hope I am not pregnant, although I did wonder when I woke up craving spaghetti hoops with loads of Tabasco :(

Also, I might be drip-feeding a bit here but I had spaghetti on toast for lunch (Heinz) but it did not sate my craving for hoops as it was long spaghetti. Thought that might be relevant?

OP posts:
sobloodystupid · 13/04/2011 21:33

Because he watches Hollyoaks with her. I'm afraid Marmalade he can't make it any clearer unless he puts the bunting out. Start detaching, gather your strength, you don't need any more information or to prove anything

ConstanceFelicity · 13/04/2011 21:34

I am guessing this man was not breastfed.

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:41

YES

He never watches Hollyoaks with me yet seems to know characters/what is going on. I feel such a fool...

OP posts:
QuickLookBusy · 13/04/2011 21:48

Is he sat there now, looking all innocent?

God I don't know how you can be in hte same room as him.

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:50

He is watching SUPERSCRIMPERS and is telling me to take note. Angry

OP posts:
FellatioNels0n · 13/04/2011 21:53

YABVVVVU. No spaghetti hoops are edible - not even Heinz ones. I would be advising your husband to leave you on account of your terrible taste and general ungratefulness.

Original poster
marmaladetwatkins · 13/04/2011 21:54

Shut it, Nelson. Walk a mile in my shoes etc etc.

OP posts:
QuickLookBusy · 13/04/2011 21:56

Fellatio have you read the rest of the thread????

The poor OP is going through hell here. Please have some sympathy.

Tee2072 · 13/04/2011 21:56

OK, everyone, an intervention is clearly needed. First it's hoops and now we have Fruit Shoots.

Who lives near this poor poor woman and can get her and her children to safety?

I think the Hollyoaks issue is the last straw, TBH.

ConstanceFelicity · 13/04/2011 21:56

Ooooooh Nelson, I bet your answer would be very different if the OP was a man...

JaneS · 13/04/2011 22:02

Oh, OP, you think you have it hard?

Spare a thought for the rest of us normal people whose husbands bring us the foragings from the dump and the kibble the rich folks' dogs didn't eat, and make us choke them down while cutting off our toes to fry for the kids' tea.

I may have to report your post for entitleness.

CurrySpice · 13/04/2011 22:08

Your DH clearly does not respect you or believe you deserve Heinz

This is just the the first of 57 different varieties of disrespect