to use the disabled toilet in this situation?

[dolldaggabuzzbuzz]

I took mine and my sister's DCs for a nice day out to the cinema. There was just me and 4 kids aged between 3 and 5. After we bought our tickets I took them to the Ladies toilet, they were all engaged and there were a few people waiting.

I decided not to wait and took the DCs out to the disabled toilet as there was no one using or waiting for it. When we had all finished we were washing our hands when someone tried the door, one of the DCs had unlocked it and this woman in a wheelchair came in with her partner, I said I won't be a minute. She glared at me and muttered some things.

I was really embarrassed that I had been caught out using the disabled toilet and I wanted to apologise to the lady for keeping her waiting (for less than a minute!) but she was really, really angry. The DCs ran out in opposite directions and I quickly said sorry to the lady and as I walked off she screamed "Bitch!" at me. I never turned back to look at her. I don't think the DCs noticed anything!

I was so upset I couldn't get it out of my head throughout the film, and it ruined my day. I don't think what I did was that bad. I thought that woman was really horrible. AIBU?

Sit down kungfu. Resist!
don't go to the dark side.

I've read the whole thread and I agree broadly with altinkum and Vintage.
An accessible loo is just that. it is not reserved for exclusive use by one group of people.

Lo...lo...lo....no, can't do it.

at Fu

You are disabled by your environment (as all mothers are with pushchairs or kids)so you are not being unreasonable. She on the other hand!

at disabled by your environment.

Anyone who thinks that having a buggy is the same as disability deserves a whole new word for stupid.

We are massively inconvenienced by having buggies. We are not disabled. Nit by a bloody long chalk.

I have read some staggeringly dim stuff on mn but that wins.

a new word for stupid!!! excellent idea. entitledtit?

This has gone on for an long time.

Yes disabled toilets are for the disabled. However there are some very good points on this thread about why people need to use it.

sometimes people have to wait to use the loo.

That's life.

are you for real moyasmum?

Disabled by your environment?

Hang on a sec.......LOOOOOOOOLLLLL!!

Sorry, Pag - it just burst out of me.

New word for stupid - environmentally-challenged perhaps?

[goes off to scrub self clean of LOL residue]

They are not "toilets for disabled users" - they are "accessible" toilets, and not reserved for exclusive use - Radar key toilets are for exclusive use.

If you are bursting for the loos, you would not use the gents because you would find other gents in there (though in long-queue situations I have known ladies use the gents), whereas an accessible toilet is likely to be empty. People have to wait for toilets whether they are disabled (visibly or not) or not. Equal rights mean that accessibility issues are to do with provision, not with whether they should have immediate and exclusive access to that provision, regardless of urgency.

This has got to be the best disabled toilet thread ever

Thank You.

Accessible toilets are so disabled people can access the toilet, full stop, NOT so they can have a right to use a toilet above all others.

If there was only one toilet in a given establishment, then the disabled person has no right to use that toilet above any other user. They would not be entitled to jump any queue (although others may show courtesy and allow them to do so, just like some people have allowed me to queue jump when I have been out with my obviously, about to wet her knickers, toddler.

And for what it's worth the toilet facilities in M&S have a sign on them indicating wheelchair/buggy toilet- so any mum with a buggy there is perfectly within her rights to use it.

So what you are suggesting kadokage, is that the op stopped washing hers and the childrens' hands after they had been to the toliet, and taken them back into the ladies to wash? Touching door handles and goodness knows what else on the way with dirty hands? Is that socially acceptable now then? To spread who knows what about a crowded cinema??!!!

Kadokage- ridiculous.

coffee is speaking sense.

Same could be said about lots of things though, disposeable nappies, umbrella folding buggies, automatic washing machines, etc etc. Doesn't mean we shouldn't use them though.

We have had a lot of what ifs, what if I need to get the buggy in there, what if I have more than one child.
No one has looked at the what if from the disabled person point of view.

The lady and her husband have decided after much deliberation to finally venture out and go to the cinema, they sit and watch their film it finishes, they then have to wait for everyone else to leave the screening room before they can leave, ensuring they leave safely without bumping into other peoples ankles, tripping people up etc. they get out of the room, people are milling around they are asked politely if they can move so the wheelchair can get through, these people either choose to ignore or look at the couple with disgust and turn away whilst staying exactly where they are (it does happen a lot) the couple then have to struggle maneouvering the chair around everybody else, they notice from across the lobby that the disabled loo is vacant (thank god as bladder is now getting uncomfortable) they continue to negotiate the various obstacles, half way across the lobby they notice that a woman and her four children have come out of the normal loos and popped into the disabled,(obviously because there is a queue in the ladies, if that wasn't the reason then she would have gone straight to the disabled) finally after a lot of hassel, ignorance and downright selfishness they arrive at the loo and wait, by this time she is in pain and he is knackered (adult and chair is bloody heavy). Finally after what is beginning to feel like a life time the door opens only to be greeted by 'I won't be a minute'.
So her day has now been ruined, she goes home seething, thinking that she shouldn't have sworn. Everytime she goes out there is something, she is spoken over, people address her husband and not her, people refuse to let her pass in her chair, she is tutted at, loud whispers 'they shouldn't be on the street, etc and the final bloody straw is someone using the disabled loo because they couldn't be bothered waiting.