How many men have you slept with?

[NameChangeBooBoo]

Tell the truth, if you can.

And how many do you confess to?

I would say seven inches & fat is probably the ideal morphology

Big n hairy, is my muff. But it's been under wraps for a while.

spider are you a bloke with a thin dick or a woman who does magic whilst trying reverse cowboy???
Loving smoothing mixer- and hating all liquid ideas!

Even - I love my full on Joy of sex bush - we should cultivate them as a reaction to the shavers....

I'm more bothered about it being neat for a smear test than for DH.

PMSL at this thread!

It's so lacks volume though

i actually haven't got a clue.

more than i would admit to put it that way.

But i am counting sexual partners, rather than just men

Kangers - why you thinking he's a bloke? 7inches and fat would be great.

How hairy (and non fashionable) is your muff?

Kangers - am most certainly a woman

I treat my bush the same way I do my legs.....bald in summer, hairy in winter......

Did you see embarrassing bodies with completely shaven thrush girl on Friday? ELNP I agree re smear- always do a good tidy up before that- those lights are so...... clinical....

Kangers - you sound like a bloke

EvenLess - I trim it for the Dr! For fuxake, I don't want him thinking I'm a hippy.

Other than that I grow it for warmth.

It's the ultimate proof that we care more about what other women think about our appearance than what men think!

To get volume I use mousse and give a good blow dry. Fo extra length I get my straighteners out but singed my minge the last time I did this so just opt for the wiry curly look now.

I have no idea - I haven't kept count, not since I could drive without a penalty on my car insurance for being young.

babyliss- Hilarious-
My muff is messy- I try to do a bit of a self-designed in the shower with no glasses and no mirror brazilian -ish narrow tidy area at the front- but it sticks out like a privet hedge- then occassionally get scissors to self trim volume in same rushed, soap-dazzled state.
It really is messy.
But my hubby does not mind- he's not 17 so expects see hairs!!!

Even - I have managed to encourage volume without lateral growth by leaving it alone for a good 37 years.

& whatever - thank you, they are the ideal dimensions for the discerning woman

That would be hard to explain in A&E. Singed minge.

GOML I am not a bloke, but an aggressive female holding back grumpy husband with the get off mumsnet diatribe.
I am rather graphic but its funny- love the mousse and the straighteners and the hippy stuff. LOL.

I dunno - I just don't want the Dr getting tangled in the undergrowth.

I shagged this bloke a while back when I was pissed and I hadn't shaved or pruned anything for a good 6 months.

He absolutely pissed himself laughing at my muff and said he loved it. He was pretty old though.

That's the problem Spiderslegs. I got carried away and removed all the hair for a few months and it's never come back the way it was. I lost my curl

Have we established how many men the OP has slept with??

Trimmed and neat here. No bush fires are starting in between my legs.

Much cleaner when shaved with a bit of fluff like a moustache on top.