to tell DH his mother's day efforts are crap

[lurcherlover]

My first mother's day (DS is 5 months)...I have received a card and a novelty wine glass saying "No.1 Mum". I am in a sulk because:

1. He knows I don't like tat that clutters up the house. How can he think I would appreciate an oversized, pink striped wine glass?
2. I'm breastfeeding so hardly drinking at the moment anyway.
3. All I wanted was a card and a bunch of flowers - how did he not think to get flowers?
4. He hasn't even thought to get anything in for lunch so I've just sent him off to Tesco.

Can I sulk or am I being childish? Well, I know I am a bit, but surely his efforts have been pretty feeble...

YABU I did not get anything from dd (4) via dh. She made me a beautiful card at preschool too. Yes I would go along with that, a lot of men are rubbish at that sort of thing.

Agree with goblin and worra.

You are not his mother - but yabu and ungrateful.

Grow up.

' It's all a bit mummy martyr for my taste.'

Funny, I was thinking the same thing about all the complaining and fussing about substandard tributes.

pigletmania- but why are so many women prepared to put up with "men being rubbish at that sort of thing"? It's no excuse.

mummy martyr?

She did get presents, they just weren't the right ones. More princess than martyr.

Personally I think flowers are an awful present - I got loads when ds was born and they were all dead by the time I got home from the hospital I'm pleased with my tacky "I love mummy" mug from ds.

Don't let it take over your day. Get him change every nappy etc...

It's not been a gift strewn day here but DS1 carried a plate of toast for my breakfast ( dropped it so ate it with fluffy carpet bits attached) and we are off to a model railway exhibition which is my idea of hell. But inbetween I am getting hugs. I thought about having a strop but it's Mothers Day so I shall remind myself why I utterly love my kids and love being a mum and drag them to the shop later to pick out some daffs for me.

YABU. He made an effort. Just because its not quite to your taste doesn't mean it was feeble.

OP get some sparling non alcoholic stuff to put in the glass to celebrate (or get DH to). When youve finished BF fill it with wine of course ;)

You are being unreasonable AND ungrateful.

I think another reason mum's who get 'crap' presents are pissed off because they it's embarrassing to admit to their other mummy friends. It's more emotive than birthday's and Christmas to some extent as to competitive mum's a crap present = husband think's you're a crap mum

I got nothing. I must have been very bad in a previous life!

It's my first mothers day. I got a card (written in front of me!!). I have been told that DS (5 months) is "making" me a present this afternoon - a splatter poo perhaps?! I assume DH is baking me some muffins or something.

I don't really care to be honest. The whole days is a load of shit.

Gosh, the consensus is I am BVU! Fair enough. I have stopped sulking. TBH I was really upset at the lack of thought. I don't want him to spend loads of money on me - that's why flowers would have been enough, or just offering to make lunch without being asked to. And he knows I like flowers. But the wine glass is just tat, sorry. And he knows I hate tat (and FGS, posters saying "wait til your house is full of tat your kids have made" - I don't think you can really equate cheap tat bought from a shop with stuff your own kids have made you! I can't wait til all I get on mother's day is a card made of computer paper and a bit of play-doh from DS!). I think what I'm upset about is the lack of thought that's gone into it. I normally accept presents with good grace whatever they are, of course, as that's good manners, but I do think things from your life partner are a tiny bit different. I've had texts all day from people saying "what did your lovely DS get you for mother's day?" and replying "er, a novelty glass" just feels a bit rubbish really.

YABU

I couldn't give a fig about mother's day or whether I get anything.

YABU! You got a gift - stop whining.

Perhaps when he senses your lack of appreciation he won't bother at all next year and then you'll REALLY have something to moan about!

YANBU - I think some people are being really horrid here. Think you are justified in being a bit pissed off actually, a small bunch of flowers and having lunch made for you is not too much to ask. It's not as though you demanded diamonds or a new car or something!

Yes yabu. And precious. It isn't even supposed to be him that gives you the gifts so I reckon your LO did bloody well

OTOH I still get a momentary quiver of regret that I don't get flowers. But I acknowledge I am being U and precious and then get over it!

another one here who thinks ungrateful, unreasonable and a moany old cow :)

OP, I don't blame you for being pissed off! As someone has already said, some posters have very, very low expectations from their partner and feel they should be happy to get anything at all.

Of course you didn't want that wine glass - who would? He bought it in a hurry and didn't think about the type of person you were and what would make you happy.

Why should anyone be happy when someone's been thoughtless?

yabu you wait till they start buying the presents themselves I have had some very odd things over the years right down to a bar of parmolive soap from my 6 yearold little girl (who is now 26 and buys wonderfull presents) who had asked for some ideas and I happened to mention I liked pretty soaps LOL

ah just read your second post and i see the problem

you wanted to show off and boast to your mates how princessy you were being treated and now cant

hard luck, live with it :)

You're being ridiculous. He got you something! Mother's Day presents don't need to be so grand, do they? Just a card would surely do. Poor guy...

Oh get off your high horse louloudia.