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AIBU?

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Original poster

to think this woman kicks ass!

215 replies

littlepigshavebigears · 31/03/2011 19:00

went to meeting of Core Offer Monitoring Group at local children's centre (like a governing body)

one of my fellow parent governors was there, she is chair of one of the committees and there was an Ofsted bod in there asking questions

this mum turned up dressed to kill, looking gorgeous, breastfed her 8mo ds in front of a roomful of people (most of them suits) without turning a hair while talking about the information the )Ofsted bloke wanted - at one point she said "Oh yes, the figures you want are in that black file to my left, if somebody could just pass it to you as I am feeding the baby"

I wish I had had that much confidence when mine were little Envy

OP posts:
Teaandcakeplease · 31/03/2011 19:27

I love her attitude too, although by 8 months mine would've been pulling off to have a good look around and everyone else would've got an eye full Grin

Very Envy of her confidence too.

MotherNight · 31/03/2011 19:32

Childrens centre, I'm think Sure Start-esque not School am I right? Either way not exactly a merger in the city. But a meeting about parents and children for parents and children.
FFS.

nethunsreject · 31/03/2011 19:35

She kicks ass.

Yanbu.

RobynLou · 31/03/2011 19:40

YANBU I bf DD1 in many meetings and whilst working.

WinterOfOurDiscountTents · 31/03/2011 19:46

Father FFing isn't a valid comparison unless he's had the bottles surgically implanted into his chest.

She shoud have stayed home, obviously, kept that nastiness away from nice professional people and there far more important business. Hmm

MichaelaS · 31/03/2011 19:54

what is unprofessional about it? IMHO that sort of talk leads to saying women should stay in the home for the first 5 years after birth because they can't possibly be professional if they ever take a day off to look after a sick child. Do we really want to divorce the elements of our life so completely that you are nothing but "professional" at work / volunteer opportunities and nothing but "off duty" at home? goodness - what happens if you accidentally make friends with someone you work with? What happens if a colleague invites you to the pub? can't possibly go as it would not be professional!!! why not mix it up a bit and have a more relaxed approach to life - Italian style? sure, if your baby is screaming and distracting everyone then leave the room. if your baby is quiet and happy, whether feeding or not - what's the problem?

Sounds brilliant and I want to be her! Grin

starcuntmole · 31/03/2011 20:04

worraliberty Would you have the same reaction if
a) person had a cup of tea/biscuit in a meeting
and b) they wiped their arse in front of the conference room?
Love that breast feeding is equated with defecation and soiled nappies in your mind. And you wonder why OP is pleased! OP-YADNBU Grin

worraliberty · 31/03/2011 20:07

starcunt the whole thing is just a bit of a Biscuit to me that's all.

If you have bring a baby to a meeting, I suppose it's par for the course to have to feed it.

I just can't understand why a woman feeding a child in a meeting kicks arse.

But the OP is happy, as are a lot of other people so it's all good Grin

shouldihaveathird · 31/03/2011 20:09

I think that's fantastic! Women have been caring for children and undertaking other work for generations, voluntary or otherwise It's just that we, in western societies, have decided that we should separate these roles, often to the detriment of our children IMHO. Sorry I know that won't be a popular opinion. Anyone who normalises bf is great in my opinion. I bf my 14 month old in public and not to make a point just because he's hungry or needs some comfort.

Original poster
littlepigshavebigears · 31/03/2011 20:10

"can't see how a woman feeding a child in a meeting kicks arse"

can you really not see the social/political significance of it? Where have you been, under a rock?

I still think good on her, and I wish more of us had the confidence to be fully ourselves - in all respects - without motherhood being some kind of shameful secret

OP posts:
LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 31/03/2011 20:12

Wineclub...Its totally different to a man ff

How so? I think it's exactly the same thing. A woman can express breast milk, so it might be breast milk being given to the child. Does it make a difference now?

worraliberty · 31/03/2011 20:13

No I haven't been under a rock.

I just can't get excited about a woman feeding her baby either in a meeting, on a bus or anywhere else.

Then again I've never seen motherhood as a shameful secret and I don't know anyone personally who does.

Maybe that's why I feel this way. You feel really happy about it and that's good.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 31/03/2011 20:16

Op... I don't think it 'kicks arse' either. A woman takes her baby to a meeting (paid or unpaid) and feeds it... whoop-de-doo. How exactly is that 'kicking arse'? All it tells me is that the woman thought it was fine to take her baby to a meeting. Is it ok for everyone to do that? It's not even a newborn.

Nobody would comment on it - whether they agreed with it or not - but you can bet your life that there were other people there who thought it was unnecessary and inappropriate for a meeting.

AlistairSim · 31/03/2011 20:16

What would be kick-ass would be if it wasn't a big deal.

FreudianSlippery · 31/03/2011 20:18

I agree with you OP.

I'm on our equivalent committee at the local SureStart and I'm sure that would happen there too :)

MooMooFarm · 31/03/2011 20:22

I agree with you OP and don't understand the reaction you're getting from some posters.

Think it's a bit sad the amount of negativity on MN at the moment. And that some people just like to disagree Confused

MooMooFarm · 31/03/2011 20:22

What happened to my bold? Blush

worraliberty · 31/03/2011 20:29

I can only speak from personal experience as a school Governor of an Infants school.

Meetings are obviously crucial to the running and success of the school. If Governors cannot arrange childcare for their children, they do not come to meetings. It's almost impossible to discuss Finance and Staffing, School Curriculum, School improvement etc with crying babies and distracted Governors.

If (and I can not think of a single reason why) a Governor did choose to turn up with a baby at an important meeting, I personally wouldn't give two hoots whether she breast fed, formula fed or didn't feed at all...I would just avise the volunteer that if she can't find suitable childcare, it's best not to volunteer her spare time because it's not actually 'spare' if she's nursing a baby.

I hope that's a bit clearer Smile

Original poster
littlepigshavebigears · 31/03/2011 20:31

it's as clear as Waterford crystal, but it's still mean-spirited bollocks

you are saying that you would rather this mumnot contribute her considerable energy, talent and intelligence because in your little mind meeting+baby=no-no Hmm

OP posts:
southeastastra · 31/03/2011 20:33

i read your name as little pigs shave big ears Grin

i wouldn't say it kicks ass, but it's certainly unusual good on her.

worraliberty · 31/03/2011 20:42

No, I'm saying a volunteer should not volunteer spare time they clearly don't have.

If you have to look after your children, it's is not spare time you are offering.

shouldihaveathird · 31/03/2011 20:44

So Worraliberty, we should just shoot ourselves in the foot as a society and say that dispite the fact that she was perfectly able to fulfill both roles at the same time, we should exclude her because she has a baby to care for? Strange logic!

worraliberty · 31/03/2011 20:49

It's not strange logic at all.

For example there are 11 Governors on the board I'm on and all of them are parents.

If they all turned up with their children there would be pandemonium. Yet it would be unfair to allow one Gov to bring their child and not another.

Do you know of any places of work that allow their staff to bring their children in whenever they turn up?

The fact these are volunteers does not make a difference.

Anyway, I've explained what I meant....it's not a big deal, just my personal opinion.

wineclub · 31/03/2011 20:54

LyingWitch

Its different because only a mother can bf whereas anyone can bottlefeed. It is likely that this woman could have left the baby with someone (the father probably) but couldn't also leave her breasts behind. I think its a positive thing that women can contribute to society before their dcs are weaned, a bottlefeeding father doesn't have that barrier, he doesn't have to tell a committee that he volunteers on that he has to miss every meeting for a year. Not all women can express or want to or have the time to. A mother might have to spend hours over a period of a few days expressing enough for one feed and would have to do that in addition to getting a babysitter whereas a bottlefeeding father only needs to get a babysitter. Although personally, given the nature of the role and the meeting I think a bottlefed baby should have been ok to attend too.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 31/03/2011 20:54

OP... Why are you insulting Worraliberty for her opinion? "...in your little mind", that's really very rude.