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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not let DD play out?

112 replies

OutOutLetItAllOut · 19/03/2011 13:32

she is 6 nearly 7, 2 other kids on our street are knocking for her. one is 9 and one is 5 or 6.
i have said she is too young to play out the front. we live on a cul d sac, not busy, but a fair few cars.
am i being a mean mum?
the kids are now sat on the path out the front of the house with dd staring longliny out the window!

OP posts:
moogalicious · 19/03/2011 13:35

Can she not just play in front of the house? Or be allowed to go one house down? You could keep an eye out that way. I'd love my dc's to be able to play out but we live on a main road.

lesley33 · 19/03/2011 13:36

I understand but I think YABU.
Tell her she can only playin the cul de sac and put the fear of god into her about cars. Thats what my mum did.

iPhoneDrone · 19/03/2011 13:36

Let her out!

DD 5 and DS 3 have been playing out all morning (cul d sac) they are having a fab time.

Rules are they are NOT ALLOWED to cross the road, they can go between one lampost at the end of the road and the drain at the other end (I can see them all the time between these two points)

They are playing with all the other kids and the new girl who moved in last week (who is teaching them Polish Grin)

Get her to check in every 10 mins or so.

iPhoneDrone · 19/03/2011 13:37

The more kids who are let out the safer it becomes.

Original poster
OutOutLetItAllOut · 19/03/2011 13:38

i was expecting to be told iwbu for even thinking about it!

OP posts:
activate · 19/03/2011 13:38

the first time you do it it hurts and feels odd

the second time you do it you still worry

by the fifth or sixth you'll just be glad they have the opportunity to be kids and realise that today's society makes you feel like you're making them miss out on great bits of childhood

not saying you're wrong - but what's the very worst that can happen?

MaisyMooCow · 19/03/2011 13:38

If you are able to keep an eye on her it shouldn't be a problem. Just tell her not to wander from the front of the house and to stay away from the road.

Bucharest · 19/03/2011 13:39

When in the UK at my Mum's house, we are also on a cul-de-sac and once she was 6 and with very rigid rules,I have let her play out with the others (all boys and a couple of years older) Always stay on our side of the road, never leave the end of the street, don't go into the other kids'houses without coming and telling me too.

feeblephoebe · 19/03/2011 13:39

i would never allow a three and five year old to play out in the road, but maybe the 7 year old could play in front of the house

ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 19/03/2011 13:42

Oooohhh, wish my dd could play out but she's far too vulnerable Envy (12 yr old with ASD)

Let her go out with strict rules and let her enjoy being a kid, it doesn't last long you know...

iPhoneDrone · 19/03/2011 13:42

They are not playing out in the road.

They are playing in the front gardens and on the pavement and having a bloody fab time.

They are also a hell of a lot more street and road savvy than most of the older kids we see walking to school who dont even look when they cross the road.

activate · 19/03/2011 13:43

just heard my 6 year yell at the 10 year old that it's not fair that he went across the road because she's not allowed to

they get what they are allowed to and what they're not

and it's a glorious day out there today

Condensedmilkaddict · 19/03/2011 13:45

Why don't you invite them in to play?

iPhoneDrone · 19/03/2011 13:46

God don't invite them in, it is a beautiful day, they need to be outside running and playing

MaisyMooCow · 19/03/2011 13:47

I agree with feeblephoebe 3 is too young to be out front. Maybe in the garden but def not on the pavement. But, he or she is not my kid so I'l butt out!:)

Summerbird73 · 19/03/2011 13:49

i totally understand your concern but if it is a cul de sac and the older ones promise to look after her then she will be fine

i grew up on a cul de sac and have many fond memories of playing british bulldog with the entire street on the grassy verge.

why dont you let her out and maybe sit in your garden with a book and keep an eye on her?

edam · 19/03/2011 13:49

This is one of the major benefits of living in a cul de sac IMO. ds has been playing out since he was 4 - initially I kept a close eye on them but have long since relaxed. If anyone falls off their bike, we can hear the yells... only downside is when they come running through the house (I leave the front door on the latch), leave the door wide open, open the back door and leave that open too. Brats.

GiddyPickle · 19/03/2011 13:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SquirtedPerfumeUpNoseInBoots · 19/03/2011 13:50

Let her out. Just tell her the rules, and keep an eye out. Being outside with kids to play with will be good for her.

Summerbird73 · 19/03/2011 13:51

iphone aww i love that your DCs are learning polish from a neighbours kid! reminds me of my spanish neighbours when i was little - they taught me little snippets too!

aww its just like the old days!

valiumredhead · 19/03/2011 13:54

What squirted said. Let her out. You are in a cul de sac - this is THE major plus point of living in one!

wellwisher · 19/03/2011 13:55

YABU. She needs sunlight, fresh air, socialisation and independence. It's cruel to deprive her of these without good reason - am :( at the thought of her gazing out of the window while the other children frolic in the sunshine!

Is she your PFB?

lesley33 · 19/03/2011 13:55

Your daughter will benefit from being outside on a lovely day playing with the other kids.

iPhoneDrone · 19/03/2011 13:57

The people who are concerned about my 3 year old, I can tell you with 100% conviction that there is no way possible that he would step out into that road.

He has been out the front since he was a baby (first with me, then me sitting on the doorstep and then last year with supervision) and he has never ever gone out in that road.

He just wouldn't because he has been out there since he was tiny and KNOWS not too. Plus his sister would scream blue bloody murder if he even thought about it.

jonasmcflonas · 19/03/2011 13:58

One of the things I liked most about moving to our new house was that the children all play out still. They range from 4 to about 14. I stood out for ages watching my DD (4 nearly 5) but now I let her out on her own. She knows the rules and is not allowed to cross the road or go in anyone's house. She absolutely loves it, and it is so nice to hear them all in the summer and not have them in the house bored. I suppose we all know what are the worst things that could happen, but playing out without adults is part of letting them learn and grow up to be independent.