to secretly judge a mum who doesn't work but bought her son's 1st birthday cake at Waitrose?

[howdidthishappenthen]

Note that she's a REALLY one-up-manship yummy mummy who doesn't work because 'money is the man's responsibility - I'm the homemaker'. Then I hear her DH praising her for 'buying' a great cake for DS's 1st birthday. OK, I accept not everyone can cook. And after a few years, of with a few DCs of course we're all going to revert to shop cakes. And Waitrose cakes taste nice and lots of my own efforts are a bit dodgy. But no job, and the 1st birthday? C'mon... make an effort!

she's judging her because the woman in question is extremely judgemental herself. It isn't that hard to figure out!

ah but her judgement gets in the way of her baking.tut tut

Ha! My sister and I spent hours making an amazing spider cake for DS's first birthday. His first birthday. What were we thinking? I mean, we enjoyed doing it very much, but there's no doubt it was all about us rather than him.

You sound very jealous and quite insecure OP

And not very nice at all

Get a life!

I'm guessing the OP has only one child, and no job, she's clearly overthinking this one.

FWIW my DS had a bought cake for his first birthday. He cooed and oooohed with excitement at the chocolate ganache. I couldn't have made one so good (M&S choc b-day cake). When my PFB DD turned one I did bake her cake myself, she only had one bite before refusing more! I didn't much like it myself. In my defense DD has multiple allergies so it was dairy/egg and wheat free. Yuk.

U are being a knob and very U!

Genuine LOL moment at organic, free range omelette.

I spent fucking hours decorating PFB's 2nd birthday cake in the style of INTG a couple of months ago, fashioning an Iggle Piggle out of blue icing. DH had to come in and calm me down when I was half way through it and no way of turning back since the party was that afternoon.

"What are her nets like?" LOL!

I am SAHM and all my dc's birthday cakes were shop bought by my mum

She probably thinks baking cakes is beneath her. And she's right.

My motto is 'if it takes longer to cook it than eat it, it's not worth it'

Why do you even give one about this?!

Personally, I try harder to make a home made cake even though I work because I have this thing about no one thinking my kid misses out because I work.

I doubt either child has appreciated this sentiment and I might as well go and but a Sainsbury Caterpillar cake and be done with it!

Having said that, the Dalek cake was bloody brilliant even though I do say so myself! Oh and I love showing the pics round the (male dominated) office. "Look I can do bioinformatics AND bake cakes, aren't I brilliant".

Amazed (and a bit worried now!) that anyone would even think to take note of whether the cake was shop-bought or homemade, much less where it came from- sure you're not secretly hoping to out yummy-mummy the yummy mummy?!

I cook, and I'm good at it. I HATE baking- I hate measuring, mixing, flour everywhere, and then the end result being like a brick. Have baked a couple of cakes for the dc, decided it was a PITA and have happily bought them guilt free ever since.

Have discovered (on the secret mummy grapevine!) that there is a factory outlet bakery near me, and if you queue outside it at a certain time on a certain day (no, I will NOT tell!) you get the same cakes they ship out to M+S etc for a fraction of the price! Tis quite an experience, because once they are sold out, that's it. I got a plain one and created a garish lovely dino scene for DS with coloured icing! Was very proud of the decorating, but HAH- any passing yummy-mummy-upmanship type would have surely thought I baked it myself!

Could you clarify please, do you think she should have made it because she has hours to spare, or because as she has no job, she should try and save money and make one. Or because she's a woman, or because a 1st birthday is special.

I'm glad I'm not your friend anyway.

Wow I really thought this was a piss take. I can't believe anyone would get so riled up about this they would write such a pointless op. It's actually hilarious.

It really
doesn't
matter

OP, how do you have time to worry about these things?

YABU.

But . . . if the woman in question has held herself out to be some kind of amazing Nigella-esq figure of domesticity then I might think the same thing. Fleetingly.

YABU, though I cook simple cakes for pleasure, none would be good enough for a childs birthday party, my decoration is desasterous.

Would rather my guests enjoyed the cake instead of spitting it into their napkins tbh.

Wow... do you not have anything better to do than judge somebody because they bought a cake?

Not specifically you now, OP, but it really bothers me that really petty, judgemental people are adding to the population... breeding the next generation of people who do the same thing... we're doomed!

As a newbie to Mumsnet I am wondering why you consider it a bad thing to buy a birthday cake from Waitrose? Am I missing something?

Love the responses though

All cakes must be bought from Iceland daisy.

Anything else is infra dig and will be secretly judged.

hth

I was living in a hotel room on DS's first birthday so bought a cake. Oh god I should have conjured one up with the travel kettle, shouldn't I. I mean there was nothing better to do of an evening than watch Russian TV. I'm such a failure .