To not want to moderate my language in front of these children?

[notanumber]

I am a teacher (Secondary in inner London).

Contrary to popular belief, teachers mostly don't clock off at half past three and are in school for a good while after the pupils have left.

This means that for those teachers who are also parents, they cannot collect their children straight from their school but have to make other arrangements with childminders/after school clubs etc.

However, my teaching colleague has children who attend the nearby primary school and he chooses to have his children (about 7 and 9) walk up to the school we teach in and and hang about in the staffroom until he is ready to go (usually about 90 minutes).

The school is short of space, many people don't have their own classrooms, and in any case classrooms are often used after the end of the offical day for twilight or revision lessons.

Therefore, the staffroom is very very busy in the hour or so after the final bell. Lots of people working (marking or planning), some people doing the networking stuff (talking to HOYs about particular pupils, calling parents, discussing upcoming lessons with their department) and others just relaxing and gossiping.

Basically it is full. Full of teachers who have got to the end of the day and dealing with all the stuff they have to do or just blowing off steam.

Teahing is a stressful job and sometimes shouting, "cunting top set year 11 make me want to kill myself!" is necessary to maintain sanity. This is extreme though, but many people do swear and discuss non-child friendly things fairly routinely.

Ok, after all that, here comes the AIBU!

On occasion, when there has been some colourful language the teacherparent
has been known to admonish with, "Language! Do you mind? There are children in here?"

The thing is, there shouldn't be children in the staffroom IMO. The clue is in the name - it's a staffroom, not a crèche.

It is the one space in the school where you can let you guard down and say what you like. especially if it's "after hours".

AIBU to think that if he doesn't want his children to hear "language" then he should make proper arrangements for them?

[Goblinchild]

'I have a hard day with undergrads sometimes'

Oh yah, I hear you. Teaching undergraduates is obviously as stressful as consecutive and resentful Y11 classes filled with teenagers who don't want to be there and are forced to remain.
Absolutely.

[petitdonkey]

OMG- yanbu. When I was teaching it was a standing joke that for the hour after the children left the air was blue. I don't normally swear but after a full day of suppressing your gut responses, you need a bit of 'fuckity fuck'.

[cumfy]

Also, wouldn't they prefer walking home ?

Much healthier :o

[scottishmummy]

report to headie and be done with it

[Goblinchild]

I'm not a swearing person, occasionally online I might say crap...
I have, however, cried in the staffroom. I'd probably have told any gawping children to fuck off or I'd kill them if I'd had to put up with them staring and speculating.

[UnseenAcademicalMum]

Furthermore, pixie, if a student wishes to contact me dring my contracted hours regarding something confidential, they could guarantee that my children would not be there (but I am contractually obliged to say that I can not guarantee confidentiality). However, my non-contracted time, is my own and if a student contacted me during that time, whilst I'd bend over backwards to help them, I wouldn't guarantee they could have a meeting with me without children being present. (In this instance, I am thinking of a particular postgrad who knew I worked till 1pm on some days and had to collect from nursery by 1.15pm, but would come with a question at 12.55pm knowing I needed to be gone in 5 mins). Sometimes expectations just exceed what is realistically OK.

[UnseenAcademicalMum]

Goblinchild, no-one forces you to spend teach Y11.

[Goblinchild]

I don't teach Y11, I teach primary.
I do have a son in Y11, a daughter at university and an OH who used to teach undergraduates and postgraduates.

[UnseenAcademicalMum]

Yes and I have a mother who used to teach primary and I am an academic who teaches undergrads and postgrads (and another family member who is an OFSTED inspector)

If they contact me during contracted hours, fair enough (my hours btw also include summer holidays etc), if they contact me outside of contracted hours (and yes, I do get some contacting at 2am and expecting a reply by 9am), I have to draw the line somewhere. If my contracted hours were till 3.30pm, either pay for the extra time (i.e. teachers should be paid more), or expect that personal life infringes on that. Do you disagree that teachers should be paid for the hours they work, as opposed to the hours they are contracted to do?

[IHeartKingThistle]

I don't want to get into a whole 'my job's harder than yours' thing but if you are not a teacher and you came onto this thread to tell the OP that occasional swearing or otherwise venting in the staffroom is unnecessary, go and spend a day in a secondary school then come back and give us a .

[scottishmummy]

completely agree professional persona and personal life not interchangeable. paid salary to be away from home,at work undertaking specific professional duties,not fannying about at 330 balancing childcare and job. with the salary comes the expectation i am available and not traipsing my dc into an unsuitable environment

[nailak]

my mum is a primary teacher, when she was teaching infants and me and my bro in jrs round the corner we used to leave home 7.30 evry morning to be at school with her by 8, then we used to spend next hour in playground/libary whatever then go to school come back at 3.30 and carry on sitting reading or watching tv somewhere etc, we hardly sat in the staff room, unless we were eating or getting a drink or something.

and as for the poster who said parent helpers cant use sr, where do they go at lunch/break? and where do they make tea?

[UnseenAcademicalMum]

pixie when you are still working at 3am, I'd hate to think I was uncommitted. I'd love to see a teacher go to the lengths I do for my students.

[scottishmummy]

why cant the teacher just use asc?hes chancing arm. tell ht

[scottishmummy]

pack it in you two.squabbling who has it hardest

wake up this isn't about how hard done to either of you is or isn't

[scottishmummy]

you are both lightweights. i have it hardest.not birkenstock wearing teachers

[IHeartKingThistle]

I teach part-time. I have to leave as soon as my timetabled hours end to pick up DCs but I work until stupid o'clock most nights after they're in bed. It's not ideal but the work gets done and my kids aren't knocking about at school with me (I can't imagine anything worse - had to have DD in school with me for 1 lesson when childminder was taken ill and I thought my head was going to explode!).

[UnseenAcademicalMum]

Gosh, don't you have it tough.

The rest of us get 30 days per year (or less) of holidays.

I don't have my children present at staff meetings because staff meetings are scheduled during contracted working hours.

[UnseenAcademicalMum]

Birkenstocks? ffs, I never left my student years. I never left my DM's.

But, it's not about getting a chip on your shoulder about working harder, it's about teachers being paid for the hours they work (I am on the side of the teachers fgs). If you are paid to work till 3.30 pm, you should expect it is only reasonable that children are out of childcare by then.

If you are paid to work longer hours, children should reasonably be in childcare longer.

[IHeartKingThistle]

UAM, it's great that you work hard, honestly, and that you give your students so much time. But you're going to put people's backs up if you go around suggesting that teachers don't do the same.