to not like 'boy' behaviour?

[Nagoo]

My Ds is nearly 4.

on the whole he is a lovely lovely boy, bright articulate and kind.

Sometimes he behaves like a bloody idiot.

But it's 'boyishness' I tell him off for. Pissing about making an aeroplane out of his knife and fork, and sliding under the table, that kind of thing. He hits himself in the head and laughs, running around for his own amusement (I don't tell him off for that, try to distract him).

I worry that I am not allowing him to be a 'boy'. because I expect him to think about what he's doing and calm down a bit. I feel like I'm trying to discipline the 'boy' behaviour out of him.

AIBU to want him to be more sensible? Is it 'boy' behaviour?

I'm still giggling at 'willy banjo'

Check out the book 'Raising Boys' by Steve Bidolph. It's supposed to be brill and explains why they do the things they do and how to react/not react to it!

Oh and my ds is just turned 6 and does all sorts of 'boy things'. His fave saying at the moment is:

"willy, bum, bum, willy, willy, bum, bum" He just around saying it at quite inappropriate times and giggling to himself. It makes me giggle too.

Then he'll pick his nose and say something like
"you should try picking your nose mummy - it's very good for you"

It think just kid behaviour.

My dd1 often rugby tackles her baby sister to the floor and the baby responds by laughing

Some kids have morre physical energy than others which I prefer makes life more entertaining!

Oh I understand your defensiveness Sardine. These gender threads do pop up from time to time and in my experience they are often started by a frustrated mum who wants to celebrate the great things about her boys because of some anti-boy comments she's seen elsewhere. Fair enough.

Inevitably, within 1 -2 pages a poster will come along and say "yeah, i agree, I don't like girls anyway". Boys love their mums more, they are less "bitchy" blah, blah, blah. Coming from women! It floors me every time. I am probably sensitive to it like Sardine as I have two DDs. Two DDs who wrestle each other and all that 'active stuff' - they just do it in tutus.

I have to admit that although that happened here again, it was a poster who said she didn't like boys first. Its horrible either way.

I should point out that DS has been known to play the willy banjo whilst wearing my heels. If I leave them out he will parade around the house in them the same as a girl might dress up in her mum's clothes.

He also likes to put my bra on his head and pretend they are earmuffs!

Belgo, that's terrible.
Who doesn't allow it? The parents or the school?

I try hard not to gender stereotype my two (ond dd and one ds)

My boy without much prompting was obsessed with vehicles and now its castles and transformers. He has started getting a bit rough and tumble at times, wanting to play fight. I have zero tolerance of violence though.

My dd grew up with all her brother's toys but from the moment she could walk was fascinated with babies e.g. would go up to babies in pushchairs when out and give them things and try to talk to them

I had no dolls in my house but when she was at my MILs she went straight to the baby doll and accessories. Spending ages at pretend play with them.

I find it fascinating and it is an interesting subject. Are these differences inate (and I appreciate there will be girls who play with cars and boys who play with dolls) or do we mould them without even realising?

My ds also had a pushchair which he loved pushing around and tea set. So I appreciate it isn't straightforward. I also think in my own post I have segregated toys into boys and girls ones so maybe I do stereotype!

I do try to treat them as individuals rather than boy/girl though and like others have said there are certain behaviours I won't tolerate from boy or girl.

I do wonder if the education system gender stereotypes? Should it recognise differences (if there are any)?

I certainly had no preconceptions such as 'boys love their mums more' and 'girls are bitchy'

My two are different but how much is that personality and is any of it gender? I don't know.

My ds actually played with my dd new doll and told me off for giving her a pretend lollypop as they 'were too hard for babies!'. I once caught him breastfeeding his favourite teddy!

But there is no doubt he tends more towards wheels/battles/knights etc.

It is a fascinating subject and like someone said if we could avoid the usual stereotypes and certainly nasty comments about boys/girls then it could be a great discussion!

It is definitely personality type. I work with children and there is no such thing as standard boy behaviour or girl behaviour to me.

HELP I have 3 girls that did not fidget at the table, knew when to behave and were helpful but we have a 10 year old boy, nearly 11, who is intelligent but driving me mad , as someone said he has "ants in his pants", cant stop fiddling with everthing and still likes to run round making noises, pretending he is an aeroplane. Is this acceptable at 11? My husband says I dont understand "Boys" my son says "Its cos you have never been one"!