Porn. Not a thread about a thread so much as a thread ^inspired^ by a thread

[allsquareknickersnofurcoat]

From what I have seen on MN, it seems I am in a very small minority not to have a problem with porn? Its a complete non-issue to me whether my DH uses porn.
I just dont understand it? Yes, I am aware that women can be exploited, but that is true of so many other things too. And it seems to be the porn itself that is the problem, rather than the working conditions that bothers people anyway.
What is so bad about watching people having sex? To anyone that says its poorly acted, why does that matter so much? Lots of TV programmes are poorly acted, that doesnt stop people enjoying them!

I obviously dont think AIBU, but am curious to know why people would think I am? And okay, part of me is hoping that the use of porn will have a less extreme reaction away from the Relationships board?

worral....I lived with boys during my University days....they watched a fair bit, it was hard to avoid.

If you could point us all to a clip where women are not being abused, this is the internet afterall, we'd all watch it and judge again. Although I suspect you'd be hard pushed to find one.

My knowledge is based on extensive discussions with my brothers partner who is a psychologist who specialises in help adults who were abused children. He has seen countless porn actors who were sexually abused as children. I really think anyone who thinks porn is harmless is either incredibly thick or doesn't have a clue what they are talking about.

Question to those who dont mind porn, would you be happy for your daughter to go and do it? Have men watching and wanking while a stranger comes in her face?

The loo in the ASDA by us smells like a rat cemetary and has a lemon-lipped auld trout "attending" to the "facilities"

These are the optimum conditions for me to be able to get my rocks off.

i like priblem better

pmsl @ bupcake

Worra, I've gleaned that information from programmes like Sexcetera and a particularly awful series called porn week, a completely no holds barred look at mainstream porn that was on a couple of years ago.
Lots of actresses singing the praises of their empowering careers, their eyes told a completely different story, they were being fucked every which way by up to half a dozen men and at the end of it could barely stand up.
If my husband was turned on by something like that I would divorce him.

DB there are probably specialist websites for people like you.

when women online defend porn i alway imagine them in a football shirt

@DB, definitely specialist :o

I watch sexetra too and that's not what I see. I doubt it's what some of the millionaire porn actresses see either when they look in the mirror.

The truth is there is abuse in many industries..The infamous 'casting couch' for mainstream film/soap/tv actors. Sweatshops in the clothing industry, appauling conditions for fruit pickers/tea industry/chocolate industry/flower industry etc....

That to me doesn't mean we should never watch TV, wear any type of clothes and avoid all fruit, tea, flowers and chocolate.

What it means to me is that we should research what it is we are buying and to the best of our ability make sure it's 'fair trade'

There are ways of doing this within the porn industry. You can read biographies, watch interviews and follow many porn stars on Twitter and other sites and hear how they feel about their own careers.

It's all about individual responsibility for what we buy or choose to view.

To those who object to porn films, domyou also object to written porn.
Say you found you oh having a wank to a copy of a blacklace. Written porn by women for a female readership and no pictures just text. Would you still be anti that porn or is purely the films you object to?

"I watch sexetra too and that's not what I see. I doubt it's what some of the millionaire porn actresses see either when they look in the mirror."

Having millions in the bank means bugger all when you're riddled with STDs, hooked on drugs and the world and Uncle Tom Cobleigh has seen your fanjo used as a jizz receptacle for the baby gravy of dozens of chaps.

In fairness, even though I am broadly speaking, anti-porn , I have a link to the Petra Joy site if anyone wants to see what is touted as female friendly porn, you have to scroll down to the trailer, it's quite explicit.
I'd be interested in peoples' views of it, I don't find it offensive or derogatory, but it's also not something I would go out of my way to watch, if my DH enjoyed it I wouldn't be upset IYSWIM.

www.petrajoy.com/shop/index.asp?prod=PJF02

Having millions in the bank means bugger all when you're riddled with STDs, hooked on drugs and the world and Uncle Tom Cobleigh has seen your fanjo used as a jizz receptacle for the baby gravy of dozens of chaps

What a sweeping statement about a group of people! Do you sterotype everyone in the same way?

Everyone? No, just a the very small section of society that we happen to be discussing in this thread

I find your comment about millionaire porn actresses more sweeping, actually.

wheres the exploitation in writing? There isn't any.

The millionaire porn actresses wasn't sweeping at all. We were discussing sexetra and that's where they were interviewed.

However, assuming they're riddled with STDs and hooked on drugs is very sweeping.

There are a lot of assumptions on this thread (a staggering amount tbh) from people who claim to not watch porn.

Why would I object to erotic literature?

Picking out a handful of millionaire actresses is not an argument - the reality for 99.9% of porn actresses is very different.

I don't need to watch it to know that the percentage of porn actresses that have earned millions from their trade happen to be very low, which is why taking their opinion as being a collective opinion for porn actresses in general is misguided.

I also don't need to watch to know that STI rates among porn actresses/actors are disproportionately high. Ditto for drug-use.

You don't need to read very much much to know this...

Erotic literature is just a posey way to say porn. I dont know if you have ever read a blacklace book but the story lines include splitroasts, group sex, whippings and just about every storyline that you would find in your averge porn film.
There is very little literature involved

But would you be ok with your oh having a wank to a woman being spitroasted in written form?

'Having millions in the bank means bugger all when you're riddled with STDs, hooked on drugs and the world and Uncle Tom Cobleigh has seen your fanjo used as a jizz receptacle for the baby gravy of dozens of chaps'.

Ah bupcakes....

You have such a way with words

For every star like Jenna Jameson, there must be a thousand girls who have been destroyed by porn, living with HIV / Herpes / HPV / Hepatitis / anal or vaginal prolapse / incontinence. Need I go on?

WRT erotic literature, perhaps your DH could be hurt that you are fantasizing over perfect men, rather than him with his beer belly, just the same as you may be upset with him looking at pictures of young pert girls, rather than you with your post-pregnancy belly and saggy boobs.

No one is exploited, but there is still the potential for it to hurt someone?

You're right bupcakes but that doesn't mean all porn is like that and that's my point. Research and fair trade is the way to go IMO

By the way, why is erotic porn not degrading? If writing about a woman on her knees being covered in jizz isn't sexualisation, why isn't it?

I've got to go take the kids out now but I'd be interested to know why it's different to write about women in these positions rather than view them.

You have to take care how you react to things sometimes.

A friend cught her DS looking at porn and tried to put him off by telling him he'd go blind. His answer?

"Dad hasn't"!

Whoops!!