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AIBU?

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Original poster

Wanting to get this teacher fired

690 replies

lividbeyondbelief · 19/02/2011 23:08

My dd attends a language class on saturday mornings in central london. This week due to horrible traffic we were 30 minutes late to collect her. We tried texting her teacher to say we were stuck in traffic but never got a reply. Anyway to make a long story short - she left my dd outside the school, alone with another boy, whilst she went out to go buy lunch. To make matters worse she told her to lie to us and say she was in the room next door if we asked where the teacher was when we collected our dd.

Our daughter was really upset and cried whilst being outside alone with this boy. My dh noticed she had been crying but the teacher just dismissed it, saying to dh she cried because he was late.

Obviously the bond of trust is broken and she wont be going back ever again. My question is what else should we do?

OP posts:
Violethill · 20/02/2011 20:16

Its a shame she won't answer why her cultural trait of being half an hour late being totally acceptable, upsets her dd so much. Or what she replied when her dd asked if they'd called. Or indeed, why they didn't call in the first place.

herbietea · 20/02/2011 20:18

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buttonmooncup · 20/02/2011 20:18

Had the teacher just gone home I would have an issue with that as if there had been an accident the kids could have been left for a very long time. But the teacher was back by the time the parents came. And the kids were 7 and 8 - not 3 and 4.

vintageteacups · 20/02/2011 20:20

yes Herbietea but at preschool, you weren't allowed to put the kids outside to wait on their own.....no matter how irresponsibly late the parents were (former preschool chair person).

veritythebrave · 20/02/2011 20:20

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Laquitar · 20/02/2011 20:21

'how long a saturday morning language lesson last fgs?'

Ours is 9.00am - 1.30 pm .

vintage these schools are not run by a company. They are run by the Consulate, Parents Commitee and sometimes the head of church/moscque/whatever applicabe.

Livid, i really think the lesson is to approach a couple of parents so that in the future you can help each other if stuck in traffic.

herbietea · 20/02/2011 20:23

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HateThePILs · 20/02/2011 20:25

Have I missed something, a person left two children alone on a street in London. This is wrong, what if the OP had had an emergency? That child could've been there all night. Even if the OP was late every week the teacher could have said upon collection that the child wasn't welcome back to school because they were always late.

There is no excuse for the teacher allowing a child to be in such a vulnerable position.

Violethill · 20/02/2011 20:29

What if the tutor had an emergency? Other people have got lives too. And a simple phone call would have ascertained what was going on- except the parents couldn't be bothered because apparently being half an hour late isn't a big deal to them.
Utter lack of respect - for their own child as well as the tutor.

HateThePILs · 20/02/2011 20:29

Wonder if the teacher has a teaching qualification....or what culture it is...

HateThePILs · 20/02/2011 20:30

They could be the most feckless parents in the world, it wouldn't make the teacher right.

Violethill · 20/02/2011 20:32

Interesting that the OP is trying to present herself as a responsible and caring parent though, isn't it? I wouldn't leave a child like that without bothering to phone and explain why

veritythebrave · 20/02/2011 20:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Psammead · 20/02/2011 20:33

HateThePILs the teacher was in the wrong. Does that mean she should be fired?

caughtinanet · 20/02/2011 20:34

I don't think the OP means that her DD was scarred - its a typo surely she means she was scared because she was left alone which is quite understandable for an 8yo who doesn't know when their parents will be coming to get them.

If this very long saga has highlighhted one thing it's that we should all ensure that we know the procedure if we're ever late picking our DCs up from something other than a school/nursery setting.

My DCs go to different sports and music activities and tbh I don't know what would happen if I just didn't show up to collect them.

I know the sports coaches have a full after school schedule and don't answer their phones during lessons - I guess they might check for a message if a parent wasn't there but in practice they will need to start teaching the next group.

Its certainly not a clear cut issue.

BoneyBackJefferson · 20/02/2011 20:34

HateThePILs

due to the story changing we don't know if the OP is right either.

HateThePILs · 20/02/2011 20:38

Erm, I'm not sure. Surely it's gross misconduct to complete disregard her duty of care. Personally my school wouldn't be getting any more pennies from me.

I really don't think the OP is right, but I think that's besides the point.

SarahStrattonHasNiceBears · 20/02/2011 20:38

It's NOT central London and OP has already stated that the school is within an estate.

"This primary school has only an estate around it and the nearest shops are a few roads down." - OPs post at 14:21:11

"We were what should have been 2 minutes away by car, but took 30 minutes due to major traffic. If my health weren't an issue i could have walked it in less than five minutes." - OPs post at 23:20:56

"You cannot park when you are stuck in the middle of 3/4 lane traffic !!" - OPs post at 23:36:19

Make your bloody mind up. I may not know every inch of zone 2 and it may be 15 years since I worked in London, but how many estates have 3-4 lane highways running through the middle of them?

Violethill · 20/02/2011 20:39

I wonder if the OP is going to come back and tell us how she explained to her dd that they didn't bother calling to say what was going on. That's the first thing any responsible parent would do, not only out of common courtesy to the adult, but to reassure the child.

Actually on second thoughts, I don't think the OP needs to bother, because she's bound to just blame anything/everybody else rather than actually face up to being responsible.

buttonmooncup · 20/02/2011 20:40

Can't see hoe the kids would have been left all night. The teacher was back by the time the parents got there and they didn't realise anything was amiss until their child told them that the teacher had nipped off to get some lunch.

seeker · 20/02/2011 20:41

OK, everybody.

Imagine you have a 7 year old. You are driving to collect said 7 year old from school and you get a puncture. It so happens that the bit of road you are on has no mobile phone coverage.

You change the tyre, and get to school 15 minutes late. You find your 7 year old sitting on the wall outside waiting for you. All the staff had to go because there was a training event they were booked into from 4.00.

Your child had no idea where you were or when you would turn up. She had just been told to sit and wait.

Are you all saying you would be happy with this?

MrIC · 20/02/2011 20:44

it sounds like there's a problem with the school

I work in a Language School and some students are as young as 7. Many are dropped off before class and/or picked up late but the responsibility for looking after them lies with the reception staff - how the hell can the teacher(s) be expected to provide pastoral care outside the classroom when they clearly also have teaching responsibilities as well as their own biological needs? It sounds to me that the school organisation is at fault here for not providing:

a) an adequate support system for their staff to deal with situations like this

b) clear instructions to parents over what to do and who to contact (and how) in such cases

Livid if you want to complain to anyone, complain to whoever is organising this language school - it's not the teacher's fault.

Violethill · 20/02/2011 20:45

Seeker:

Imagine you are a tutor paid to teach a language lesson from 10 to 12. You have arranged to pick up your own 8 year old dd from a Saturday morning club at 12.15. Two children from your own class haven't been picked up, so you feel you can't leave them, but on the other hand, you have finished teaching, the parents should have arrived, and your own daughter is waiting on a busy street (possibly in a terribly dangerous area)

Are you saying you'd be happy to just let your own child remain in a vulnerable position?

phooey · 20/02/2011 20:45

Seeker - is my seven yo sitting on a wall on a central London street or in a playground behind school gates in a suburb?

Wink
FairhairedandFrustrated · 20/02/2011 20:45

I doubt very much that the tutor left the children!

What she most likely said to both children, was something along the lines of, wait out here so your parents can see you, don't worry, I am just in the next room getting lunch" (obviously I wasn't there) but this seems more likely than leaving them.

I think the OP is overreacting, making a mountain out of a mole hill etc etc etc...

I wouldn't like my own 7/8 year old left alone (albeit with another child) in the school playground, but I actually doubt very much that this is what happened.

The OPs lack of regret is staggering... the very fact she blames the tutor on leaving them alone & not herself for being late, speaks volumes!